To ask for the life advice that has served you well?

[mumofoneAloneandwell]

The truth shall set you free

If you find you dislike a man, walk a mile in his shoes. Then you will be a mile away, and you will have his shoes

Nothings stays the same.
If you going through a bad time it won't be forever.
Brighter days will come.

I'm loving these.

'Give me the serenity to accept what I cannot change, the courage to change what I can, and the wisdom to know the difference'

Don't let the bastards grind you down

I see it more as when you're in a stupid or petty disagreement with someone you love to ensure you don't hold on to anger and resentment. So not to stew basically.

Work smarter not harder

What’s for you won’t go by you.

The only way out is through

Shoulda Woulda Coulda

said in response to anyone saying “oh I wish I’d done that instead…..”. No point worrying about what you shoulda, woulda or coulda done. You didn’t.

Deeds, not words.

If you look after the pennies, the pounds will take care of themselves.

Never say never.

What’s for you, won’t go by you!

'If you look after the pennies, the pounds will take care of themselves...'

I think many, many of us are trying this continually, but it never seems to of any help. Something else always goes up in price, or another thing crops up to wipe out any savings made.

Pay yourself first.

Also “learn to live the life unplanned” (although still working on that.)

Love this!

And yes that was a great life lesson for me generally. And for dating I couple that with “if he wanted to, he would.”

I teared up at the dog bit, what a lovely bit of perspective.

Something I was once told by a friends parent

Dont complain. If everyone in the world was sitting at a large table and we were all asked to put our problems on the table for everyone to see. Then the host says “take someone else’s problem home”, you will most likely take your own problem back.

They said it better - but ultimately, everyone has a problem. And we are built to deal with our own.

And recently - fall in love with problem solving.

Lastly - you are not better than anyone. But nobody is better than you.

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Sometimes your best yes is a no.

Marry a man that makes you laugh - one day that's all that will be left.

"Don't worry about things above your pay grade."

I was in my first job fresh out of university. It was an admin job, which I came to realise I wasn't well suited to. It was all very procedure driven, and I'd stress about getting things wrong, going home and worrying about stuff.
I said this to an older colleague over lunch one day, and she just looked me straight in the eye and said that.
It helped me so much, and I've never forgotten it.

• Things you buy are worth what they're worth to you. If someone laughs at you because you've spent a lot on something - ignore. If it's worth that to you personally, that's all that matters.
• Don't let the best be the enemy of the good. In other words, don't be a tedious perfectionist.
• Remember that, when you're doing anything, at work or in your personal life, you have a plan or idea in your head which no-one else can see. If you fall short of it slightly in your own mind, it won't necessarily be obvious to others. I used to moan to people, or reject compliments, because what I'd done hadn't matched up to the ideal plan in my head. But that plan was just in my head.
• In 2, 5, 10, 100 years...nothing we're worrying about will matter!!!!!
• Many issues solve themselves if you do nothing. (Not always appropriate, but some things are best left to time to resolve).
• Style and elegance are NOT about fashion. Fashion is an entirely different thing. Style is about individuality and confidence.
• I think that most of the problems with relationships we see on MN would be avoided if people valued themselves more, set a higher bar for friendship and romantic relationships. Choose the right people and you avoid most of the misery of exploitative and toxic relationships. A few true friends are better than loads of superficial mates who don't care about you.

That one has saved me so much angst over the years.

Also if a jobs worth doing, it’s worth doing well.

Don't let principles get in the way of pragmatism - if something works, do it.
I've seen so many problems caused by people with unshakable principles. They were very pleased with themselves, but other people suffered as a result of their obstinacy.

I think “what’s for you won’t go past you” can be a bit glib in certain situations though. It wouldn’t have helped when I was struggling with infertility for example.

I'm sorry you had to go through that. Yes, I've heard that one but I don't like or agree with it; it feels kind of fatalistic. Why bother trying to make stuff happen if it's already determined whether it's "for" you or not?

Don't bring your emotion to work.

Yep - I find that a bit glib. Same with “if you really wanted it you would be doing to”. There are ao many barriers to that.