Totally spiralling right now. I have Body Dysmorphia and have had it all my life, haven’t had therapy. Older guy I’m dating has spoken about a beautiful woman who works at a restaurant in Crete near his holiday home. Says he could look at her all day- she beautiful, thin, long legs etc. When I suggested he would like to be with her he dismissed the idea but his reasons were that she just sees him as a tourist etc. So more to do with her probably not wanting him.
Have seen her a photo of her and she’s literally stunning. I feel full of self hatred now, comparing myself to her and feeling utterly and completely ugly. Wish I had never given him any photos of me, he must be really repulsed. He is going back to Crete in September and I am utterly dreading it. He says I have blown it way of proportion but I feel like maybe some people here might understand how I feel. Just need some understanding and kindness. He is aware of my BDD but doesn’t really understand it. He compliments me a lot on my appearance, which lifts me up but then he says something like this and I spiral. He is mortified that he’s made me feel bad, says what we have is special and goes beyond physical appearances.
AIBU to ask - is he insensitive or am I over sensitive? Please be kind.