You fool, you idiot!

[coulditbeme2323]

There were a couple of threads on MN yesterday about what posters spend their money on. One was about a slice of cheesecake in London and the other the cost of a toastie in a Garden Centre.

Neither items were cheap, but I thought there was a lot of rude comments such as "only idiots pay that" or "you fool."

Now MN is for debate and there is nothing wrong with disagreeing, but is name calling really fair just because people choose to spend their money on different things.

It is bear pit

My DD spent £18 on a bowl of olives the other week ... in some bar in London 🙄

I mean if it was a nice place, and she enjoyed it, why not!

No, I don't think that name calling is acceptable, or swearing for that matter. I manage not to do either when posting on here. But then my language on MN, is the same in rl anyway.

We all have different priorities but when it comes to money, people get very weird and personal.

Things that I think are foolish to spend money on, others would see as absolute essentials. And vice versa.

There's nowt so queer as folk.

Some on here are tight as arseoles tho

I love the flask and sandwiches brigade!

Am I the only one who heard this said in the voice of Cruella de Vil (Glenn Close) in 101 Dalmatians?

Nothing wrong with carrying your own lunch when going on a Day trip, if you can, or want to. At least they will not be ripped off by eating in an overpriced cafe. I don't feel the need to look down, and sneer at people who do this. The same way I don't care who wishes to spend £19 or whatever it was, on a sliver of cheesecake.

I luv them when they get the sandwiches out on the plane,washed down with the free water (which they must give you) from the airport departure lounge... priceless

I agree there is nothing wrong with taking sandwiches, it's when people suggest that to posters who quite clearly don't want to make their own sandwiches!

Sensible, I agree.

It's probably sensible from a cost perspective, but some people want to relax on holiday.

It’s rife. Like all forums people say things they’d never dream of in real life. Sad really.

Mumsnet users can demean any argument they might have about a topic by swearing, insults and generally being abusive. It doesn’t enhance the point they might be trying to make at all.

Those threads are ten a penny and I love them. Did anyone say they should forgo their cheesecake and give the money to charity? 🤞🏼

Fair enough, we are all Adults here, and should not need to be advised about taking a packed lunch. If people want to spend over the odds on food when out, and about, and can afford to do so, it is no one's concern at all.

I quite often take my own sandwiches (have been known to do so on a plane, though not always), but would equally be happy to spend £20 on a piece of cheesecake if it was amazing cheesecake in a fancy place and I thought I would enjoy the experience.

We went to a NT place over the weekend, took our own sandwiches because I didn't feel like queuing for half an hour and spending £30+ on lunch on what was supposed to be a cheap day out. Quite happy to spend the £7 on 2 ice creams though because they were delicious and we enjoyed them.

I don't like paying over the odds for things that aren't worth it (whether that be in terms of the food itself, or the overall experience) but I've certainly been known to fritter away money on things others would view as a complete waste.

Answering the actual point - I think a lot of mumsnet, especially AIBU, is just people enjoying getting to insult others and project the version of themselves they most want to believe (they're so rich they can afford stupid prices for cake, or they're so good with money that they'd never do such a thing even though they earn 6 figures or whatever it is). Fool and idiot are not the most offensive terms that get thrown around on here! I don't care so much when it's general discussion topics, but it's really nasty when it's to people genuinely looking for help.

I saw that thread and agree that there were some very sneery people on it.

I also think you sound quite sneery about the flask and sandwiches 'brigade' here OP 🤷‍♂️

I do still come on here (joined in 2011 when my youngest was newborn) as I find human life and interactions fascinating.

But a previous poster has it right that it’s a bear pit. And 2 things surprised me hugely as I noted the change - the increase in casual insults and the general lack of empathy.

I posted on 1 January this year after the unexpected death of my beloved daughter 2 months previously. I had been surprised and a bit unsettled that some friends had messaged me wishing me “a happy new year” and I asked if I was unreasonable to feel surprised about that. Although the responses I had were largely kind, I was taken aback by the number of people who thought that I should be grateful to have been remembered at all and I could not expect a tailored message just for me. One poster even suggested that my friends might have thought I was “getting over it now” (I can’t be sure that was the phrase they used it might havd been “feeling better” or something similar) given we had been out of the country for Christmas. Despite my having explained that this was just because we could not face Christmas in the UK and that I had been having suicidal thoughts.

Sorry, op, I digress. But I agree with you. It’s madness on here at times. With some quite startling bluntness, rudeness and lack of sensitivity. BUT. And it’s a big but, before anyone wades in, I choose to have a look see several times a week and even to post occasionally. It’s still a fascinating place. And there is kindness to be had too. It’s just a bit harder to find than maybe it was 14 years ago. But I think that might be a reflection of life in general.

I think the 'you fool' brigade do sometimes miss the point. Going out for food or going for coffee is about the experience rather than purely about being fed and watered.

I always imagine them snorting in disgust when they write 'you foo!l' or 'total nonsense!' or 'rediculous!'.

How is taking your own packed lunch, which has exactly what the person wants in it, on a plane, indicative of not being able to relax while on holiday?

😁 I heard it in the voice of Ren. "Steeempy ... you eeeediot ...."

If you are asking me personally?

I don't want to be making sandwiches while getting ready a family of five for the airport, I don't want to eat sandwiches in the middle of the airport, I want to sit in a restaurant and have somebody wait on me.

Sometimes its cost and worth. I take my DC to a nice bakeries after hospital visits so we have something to look forward to afterwards. I see it as an affordable luxury. The cost is considerably more than Lidl's bakery, say, but worth it to sit somewhere nice, chat and decompress.