AIBU to be fed up with my in-laws' reverse one-upmanship?

[GreenPoppies]

I know I'm not being unreasonable because making disparaging comments about someone elses choices is always rude but does anyone else get so annoyed by reverse one-upmanship?

My in-laws are the ultimate in this. We are going on holiday to Portugal in August and they are flabbergasted that we are flying. "But why can't you just drive? It's so brilliant. We love driving. The views from the motorway are second to none. I don't understand why you're flying" Because, Not-So-Dear In-Laws, we have 9 month old and a 2 year old, and 2-3 days of driving is neither comfortable nor practical. "But just do it all in one go, it's only 24 hours if you drive non-stop, you'll be fine, it's so much fun, I don't understand why anybody would fly there in 2 hours when you could drive there in 24! Such luxury!".

We took our (then) 18 month old camping last year in our 4 man tent. "you sat on CHAIRS?! Oh wow, that's crazy, I can't believe you sat on chairs, we would just sit on a tesco bag. And that tent may as well be a castle, we just prop up a tarp and sleep under that, no need for sleeping bags, it's so much fun to camp without all the unnecessary extras".

We were once on a walking holiday with them and I mentioned (didn't make a fuss or anything) that I needed to stop at a shop. When they pressed ("why on earth do you need a shop? Just sustain yourself on beer for 3 days!") I said I needed some plasters as a stone had got into my walking boot and rubbed my foot raw, I'd bled all over my sock. I was made out to be the most precious princess ever, to this day I'm ribbed about "can't even do a 6 hour walk without needing a plaster the next day! We just walked through the blood!"

I'm getting fed up of gritting my teeth and putting up with it. I've bitten back a few times and told them to shut up if they can't say anything nice but again, I'm seen as 'dramatic' and it's ignored. I now try and avoid them but obviously they are my kid's grandparents and otherwise not bad people so needs must.

It feels like they assign a moral worth to anyone who does not suffer like bloody Christ on the cross! I'm a second rate human being because I fly, camp in a tent, use plasters and god-forbid breathe bloody oxygen. The fact I've run 10+ ultramarathons (so fully know what discomfort feels like) goes ignored....

Arghh I feel better for that rant now :)

Tell them you're proud to be a princess. How bizarre to expect you to walk with painful feet. They sound incredibly weird.

Are these people for real?

They do not seem to understand what comfort. pleasure and enjoyment in life are about.

Sounds as though they would be happier living in Refugee Csmp.or War Zone..Where people genuinely suffer from shortages. terrible living conditions and limited resources on a daily basis.

Because they have no choice.

Eeh By Gum.

Best holiday we've ever had

That library thing is utter shite! I was born in 1972, on Saturday mornings my dad took us to local library I'd be 5 or 6 ish so late 70s into early 80s.
I had every topsy and Tim book out of there, I loved getting my book stamped, the stamper thingy just fascinated me. I even had my own library card. So she's talking shite

Yes, this. Next time you go on holiday, tell them you're walking there. All the way to wherever. And see what they come up with.

@Steeleydan yes one thing we did have was the library.
We were called Junior Readers and had a blue card.
The kids’ section in my local library was as big as the adult section.
And I can remember going for meals occasionally and definitely getting clothed.
I can remember having a lot of stuff from a brand called Ladybird? And M&S stuff at Christmas, as well as C&A.

Exactly! I was going to suggest that you call them that and start quoting some lines to them!

Personally, I would be mimicking them each time once they started and just going one step further. I mean massive piss taking. Really lean into it and have fun.

This is one of the funniest threads I've read for ages.

The "yes, isn't it great" response on repeat is genius. Going to use that.

Great response - a bit patronising, just amused tee hee, better than they deserve tbh!

I agree. "We walked to school in the snow, uphill both ways". I thought the first post was a joke.

While we’re on Monty Python territory “tis but a flesh wound” might be worth quoting liberally if anyone else takes the piss out of needing plasters!

As I was reading the opening post, I thought "This would make a bloody good comedy sketch"!

They sound really tedious OP, I'd be minded to go low contact with them, and give away very little about where you go etc.

I like camping, was talking to my parents about some stuff I had bought for next holiday, all I got was 'that's not camping!, electric lights! blow up mattress! yada yada, my reply? 'I'm astonished you both know so much about camping, I've known you for 63 years now and I've never once known either of you sleep in a tent' The silence was wonderful😂

Yes I had a FIL like that. He was more the sort to make snide comments. "your children will turn into delinquents as you are going back to work and using a nursery" (SiL didn't work).
I just stuck to the same response "oh FIL! We have a saying back home, if you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all" worked quite well.

They sound absolutely feral.

My response? "Why on earth do you sleep in a bed at night!? I just sleep on the floor of a shop door-way. Much more fun! Tally-ho!"

That's so annoying for you OP. My MIL could be like this. An example that sticks in my mind was she asked what we'd done with the kids one day during school holidays, I said we'd gone swimming then geo-caching (kid's choices). She then regaled us with tales of how she didn't do boring activities, and how they walked up some mountain in Yorkshire and got completely lost but luckily met a man who walked them some of the way back, then went down the wrong side of the mountain and someone else had to take them back to their car and it was after dark when they arrived back. Oh and it was near a military zone and a soldier had turned them back from their path and helped them get to a village.

And I replied "Really? I like to plan things quite well so I don't disrupt the day of random people or require the armed forces to get me back to my car".

Anyway, my response was to reduce the number of times I saw her, and also reduce my speaking time when I did see her. If she started a rant about some activity and how hilarious it was I'd just go on my phone and let DH handle it.