This is off isn't it?

[coulditbeme2323]

Husband and I loaned another couple a significant amount of money as if we didn't their dream home would have fallen through. All properly drawn up, and to be fair was for a short period of time as in just under 3 months.

All paid back two weeks ago as agreed (no interest by the way as it might matter) and friend text saying we want to take you our to dinner to say thanks.

Didn't expect or want that, but lovely gesture.

Went to a very nice place Saturday and other husband said to my husband I'll get the food and you get the wine/drinks. Now to put into context the wine/drinks were about 35% of the bill so other couple paid 65%.

Now it's not the money, and it was a lovely evening, and I would never mention to my friend, but is that a bit cheeky?

My view is that they were bang out of order considering what you had done for them. The least I would expect is a fully paid for dinner including drinks, cocktails, whatever. What they did was not very nice at all, and not what normal people in their circumstances (financially secure) would do I reckon. You are dead right to think it was "off".

In fact I'd ask them out for drinks (not dinner) and sit on my hands for the night. That's easier said than done, but it's what I'd like to do. But then again Mr. Moneybags didn't have any qualms in doing the same thing did he.

I would be plotting something I think. And I would be raging at their obvious lack of gratitude for your very decent and invaluable help.

Nowt quare as folk eh?

Maybe she hadn’t told her husband that the plan was to pay the whole bill?

It's what my DM would call, 'spoiling the ship for a ha'porth of tar.'

It'll niggle you forever OP. Silly man.

Yes, since the meal was supposed to be a thank you for having lent them a substantial amount of money, to enable them to secure their dream home.

Yes that would piss me right off. They should have paid the whole bill no questions asked.

This is a great saying and I'll be using it from now on!

Yes under these circumstances that was rude and should have been agreed in advance

Why??? Either is a massive amount of money to lend a friend!!!

I wonder if the husband had no idea of the reason for the meal. Maybe the wife didn’t tell him it was a Thankyou meal

Exactly the same. It's these type of responses that I just think people are here just to argue

@coulditbeme2323 I'm totally with you.......taking you out for dinner, should be food and drink.
You loaned them a substantial amount, the least they could do is treat you to a meal with everything included.

Yes its tight .. they wanted your money to borrow but can't pay for a meal & drinks to say thankyou for helping them ..it is off .

You are not wrong, that is what I would have expected. If it was a very expensive restaurant, I might have suggested to DH that we pay for the wine, while the other couple paid for the food but I would certainly have taken their offer to mean that they were intending to pick up the bill.

I'm just wondering if you read the OP fully?

Some people are just foolish. If they couldn't afford the whole restaurant food and drinks, they should've cut their coat to their size. Buy a lovely bunch of flowers and a nice bottle of wine that they can fully pay for with dignity. But no. They wanted the whole 'big man, we're taking you out to dinner!' performance, and then couldn't afford to follow through.

OP doesn’t sound grabby in the least. You sound goady and rude yourself.

I totally disagree. They loaned them a large sum of money and were invited out for a meal as a thank you. It is very odd splitting the bill, in effect. It takes the gesture out of the thank you and they would have been better not bothering. Very odd!

Quite the opposite.

I think you'll find that it's more a matter of principle than of money @Lmnop22.

What your friends did was totally out of order OP.

Idle curiosity ... did your friend's wife know that he had asked your husband to pay for the wine?

@OP your friends have no 'class'. That's the word i was looking for. They're not foolish, just classless.

This is weird on their part. If you offer to take someone out for dinner as a thanks or whatever then surely that is what you do - ie you pick up the whole tab! You don’t offer to do it, and then not.

Was It a miscommunication between the pair of them? Ie one made the offer and the husband didn’t get the memo?

Or their finances are more strained than. You think or one of them thinks?

Yes,but they didn't pay any interest on the loan. To me, if someone had loaned me money. I would have paid for the whole meal and drinks

I think this really says a lot about these friends.

Yes they are very cheeky.
You loaned them money, agreed on no interest (already very generous of you btw), they invite you out (which means they pay) and then don't pay the full bill. That's really not on.

Multi millionaire buys a multi million pound holiday home and has to borrow a small percentage of it?

Well yes, of course she was. They lent these people a significant sum of money for several months, interest free. The couple texted them and said 'we want to take you out for dinner to say thanks.'

Which bit of this indicates to you that the OP should have expected to pay for any of it?