AIBU for stopping a nice Muslim girl from showing my son her hair?

[BeSpoonyRedCat]

It was on Monday after school, 10 year old DS, a very traditional 10 year old Muslim girl, and another 10 year old girl from my son's school were in the living room.

DS asked to see the Muslim girl's hair and she was actually about to show him. I stopped her, nothing dramatic. I basically said no sweetie, don't do that. I wasn't loud. Both girls looked like they wanted to laugh while my son looked annoyed. After I finished dropping the girls home, my son was all moody.

Yesterday he was still moody and I asked why he's upset. He basically explained that the Muslim girl doesn't show any other kid her hair. I said there's a reason for that. And I'm thankful my son didn't ask me the reason because I actually don't know.

From my perspective, I was being a responsible adult with my son and 2 girls under my supervision. I don't know the ramifications of that little girl showing my son her hair. I don't know if her parents would have been upset with her. I don't know if her parents would have banned my son from being friends with her. But I'm still wondering if I was dramatic.

Am I being unreasonable?

I think you did exactly the right thing.

I'm a primary school teacher, currently teaching Year 5, and have two girls in my class who wear head coverings.
Only a couple of weeks ago, we needed to take the temperature via the ear of one of them. We asked her if she wanted to go into a separate room so she could move her hijab out of the way without boys potentially seeing her hair. She did.

It's just being respectful of other cultures. And now your son knows that it's impolite for an unrelated male to see a girls hair. It's just a manners lesson. If he wants to be huffy about it, that's his problem.

Bit just in this particular instance.
A boy or any other male has no right to ask a girl to remove any item of clothing that she doesn't want to remove for whatever reason she doesn't want to remove it. Any item whether it is a cardigan, a hat or underwear.

Out of interest, does your school do anything to try and determine how the girls feel about having to wear these head coverings? Any safeguarding policy?

Do you try and determine if there is coercion or conditioning or any other ulterior motive like in the case of Sara Sharif who was put in a hijab to hide regular signs of the physical abuse she suffered before her father ultimately murdered her?

Is it possible that lessons have not been learned from the circumstances that led to her murder? What has changed to stop it happening again?

Services in Surrey failed to identify that Sara was at risk of abuse and did not question unexplained bruising, the review, external found. This included a failure to properly investigate why Sara started wearing a hijab - that covered the bruising - for "fear of causing offence".
….
The review also found it was not properly investigated why Sara started wearing a hijab, saying a newly qualified occupational therapist was reluctant to mention it for "fear of causing offence". It was later learned that she wore one to hide her injuries.
Neighbours also said they "feared being branded as being racist" if they reported concerns.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/crmx0ge18d8o?app-referrer=deep-link