Friend asking to borrow few k for her friend?!!!

[JenniferAnistonnumber1fan]

get a call from a friend who is 70. (who btw I’m not close friends with me, we talk on phone every few months or meet up for coffee a few times a year, she’s more my mums friend) asking if she can borrow a few thousand for her “good” friends?

says they are in a very bad financial situation and she really wants to help them? She gave them her money but just needs a few more thousand.

kind of shocked, i tell her I can’t. I mean…I don’t know these people?

she goes well I do! They are my GOOD FRIENDS, They are such nice people you have to help them!!! You trust me don’t you?

she then says you still have that inheritance don’t you?? Your sister in law said you haven’t spent it yet.

I reply…yes but thats locked away in high interest savings accounts for years…( shocked she knows about inheritance)!

she does like a sad face then says oh right I forgot! My Lithuanian pension is supposed to be coming in a few weeks, I’ll use that! Phew. Problem solved!!! Ok never mind.

but after she hasn’t talked to me in a while.

am I right to find this very all very bizarre?

1. this friend brags how great her pension is, how well off she is, how she financially supports all her family, her grand sons ex/baby mama, paying for her beauty treatments, days out and holidays and grandkids and that she has 30k in savings from house sale
2. We are not close friends
3. she brags that she has soooo many friends and how popular she is. She has friends much closer than me. She has relatives. Why not ask them??
4. I don’t even know these people

she knew about the inheritance, (got 25k)

because my sister blabbed to her I got inheritance years ago. She also recently asked “so has she spent all of it”? To which she replied no

All sounds very suspicious, that she is apparently so wealthy she has been throwing money around, but now has none and is asking about other people's savings. I also thought maybe she's being scammed, maybe in person rather than online? Or maybe she is just borrowing from Peter to pay Paul and it's the same money going around in circles (none of it hers). I think we will never know

my husband says it’s not a coincidence she contacts when she learned about my inheritance.

especially contacting my sister and asking “how much is the inheritance” “what did they do with the money” have they spent that money? Or do they still have it?” asking more nosy questions about the inheritance

He doesn’t think it’s scam,

says very convenient isn’t

he reckons she’s been spending too much money impressing relatives being the “fairy god granny” “cool rich granny”

she’s run out of money and planning to borrow from me then says she’ll later say these people disappeared/didnt give back

This is his theory, What do you guys think?

No, you're under no obligation to potentially lose thousands of pounds to some complete strangers because a vague friend says you ought to!

Like @PolkaDotPorridge I never lend money. If I'm in a position to help a friend in genuine need I may give them some money and indeed I have done so on occasion, but I'd never lend.

Clearly your husband thinks YOU are the one being scammed then! (Or potentially although clearly you're not falling for it). So this woman isn't really a friend at all then?

He could be right. You could play along, say you'd consider if but you'd need to have a contract drafted with legal repayment terms and see how she reacts. Or just ask why these 'friends' so desperately need the money.

The scam is someone contacts her by social media, phone whatever way, comes over very nice but has a small problem desperately needs a small amount of money after a few very nice chats she agrees and sends them money. They are eternally grateful, are coming into money soon and will pay back, but they just need a bit more to pay legal fees, which she sends and then there's another more expensive problem, etc, etc. It may or may not involve actual romance, but often wanting to meet and cost of flights and visas comes into it somewhere, of course they never arrive. People lose tens of thousands of pounds (or more) to these dear friends. And If they can't afford the latest requirements people start borrowing money to give them, just like your friend is asking you for money for her friends. Any number of variations on the theme.

Edit: She may not want to ask close friends or relatives as they might smell a rat. And normally there is a reason why it all has to be hush hush.

I'm sure the person you inherited from would love their final gift going to a stranger's stranger. Using it in a way they would have been happy with is important to keep in mind, imo.

Why would you even consider giving away thpusands? Because you will not get it back
Give to a registered charity if you have spare money.
Tell this lady she is being scamned and walk away.

@JenniferAnistonnumber1fan Just block her number.
And don't fall for the sad face/begging if she turns up at your house.

No is the right answer and you don’t have to explain.

That was my thought too. The story is weird and I would bet that there's something sinister going on that she has herself caught up in.

She could be being scammed or blackmailed, either way it's not your problem. They say a friend in need is a friend indeed. Banks lend money tell her to ask the bank, better still avoid her abd advise your mother too incase she gets hooked in.

She's asking for money from friends, for people they don't know. It's a scam. They are fleecing her. They've now fleeced her enough that she is going begging on their behalf. Google how much money is being scammed now.
Madness. Tell her as much.
Friend got romanced scammed recently, we all warned him, but no...apparently it was true love. Now his savings are gone, so is she. Took 6 months to bleed him dry.

I’m not sure how she’s done what she’s done with £30k? It’s hardly big bucks and neither is your inheritance. I’d just ignore her, if she’s done what she’s done then it would take no time to spend £30k.

No No No
neither a borrower or lender be
if shes short if a few £ she should stop giving it away

She's a CF to ask and to bring up your inheritance. I'd be tight-lipped with SIL about anything I didn't want spread about, but just be prepared to refuse unreasonable requests. I'd be glad to see the back of your 'friend' after that, but if she ever comes back and starts that nonsense again, I'd not hesitate to tell her that you don't care if her friends were the nicest, best people in the world. You still aren't giving them your money. Sorry, not sorry!

No. Tell her to fuck herself.

PP's suggestion of warning your mother is a good idea, though she may not ask her if she doesn't perceive her to have an inheritance sitting around ready to spend. 🙄

Tell her to fuck off harrassing you and it ain't happening period. I would be blocking her on everything and not bothering with her ever again as she is no friend and how dare she treat you like this. I would be ripping your sister/sister in law a new arsehole as well for divulging your private information cheeky bitch - why did she think that was acceptable. Tell them fuck all in future.

@JenniferAnistonnumber1fan shes going the right way to be scammed

Scammers often do this - once they have sucked their victim dry, they persuade them to ask friends or family members to 'help' them. If she's a friend, I would talk to her to try to get to the bottom of it, and signpost her to the correct authorities or organisations for help or support.

an old friend who has poor mental health was almost scammed by a thief on facebook a few years ago. The person pretended to be a semi-famous man and said he was down on his luck, he'd pay the money back etc etc.

When she told him she had no money at all (she doesn't have two pennies to rub together) he suggested she ask her family. She said well my mother is worse off than I am so no. He then said well don't you have friends? Call them! Ask them and all I need is xxxx money and as soon as I get this little problem fixed you'll be repaid double.

I felt so sad when I read to her accounts of exactly the same scam online, she kept asking me 'but its really not Semi-Famous Man? Are you sure?'

Its easy to catch people off guard and suck them in to a scam. Your friend has probably already been turned down by her family and other friends.

hmmmm yeah

she never contacted my mother

I suspect that she asked you even though you are not close is because she has all the other people she close to and they have said no.

I suspect that she is being scammed either by some romance scam or via her family and their friends.

I would be warning your Mom and I would be having strong words with your sister about not discussing your business with anyone.

that was supposed to be 300k

not 30k, 300k*

she also few years ago claimed she has private pension left to her worth a few million

which is why I’m so confused

She’s advertised herself as a target then