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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend asking to borrow few k for her friend?!!!

97 replies

JenniferAnistonnumber1fan · 21/04/2026 12:08

get a call from a friend who is 70. (who btw I’m not close friends with me, we talk on phone every few months or meet up for coffee a few times a year, she’s more my mums friend) asking if she can borrow a few thousand for her “good” friends?

says they are in a very bad financial situation and she really wants to help them? She gave them her money but just needs a few more thousand.

kind of shocked, i tell her I can’t. I mean…I don’t know these people?

she goes well I do! They are my GOOD FRIENDS, They are such nice people you have to help them!!! You trust me don’t you?

she then says you still have that inheritance don’t you?? Your sister in law said you haven’t spent it yet.

I reply…yes but thats locked away in high interest savings accounts for years…( shocked she knows about inheritance)!

she does like a sad face then says oh right I forgot! My Lithuanian pension is supposed to be coming in a few weeks, I’ll use that! Phew. Problem solved!!! Ok never mind.

but after she hasn’t talked to me in a while.

am I right to find this very all very bizarre?

  1. this friend brags how great her pension is, how well off she is, how she financially supports all her family, her grand sons ex/baby mama, paying for her beauty treatments, days out and holidays and grandkids and that she has 30k in savings from house sale
  2. We are not close friends
  3. she brags that she has soooo many friends and how popular she is. She has friends much closer than me. She has relatives. Why not ask them??
  4. I don’t even know these people

she knew about the inheritance, (got 25k)

because my sister blabbed to her I got inheritance years ago. She also recently asked “so has she spent all of it”? To which she replied no

OP posts:
Itsalwayslocation · 21/04/2026 12:11

It sounds like she’s part of some bad online romance scam where she has to keep sending money - are you sure she knows these people??
I definitely wouldn’t be giving her money but I might be flagging it with your mum/her family

Figcherry · 21/04/2026 12:13

Your 'friend' sounds like she's giving money away that she can't afford and is now running out and trying to continue the facade of wealthy benefactor.

Lmnop22 · 21/04/2026 12:15

Itsalwayslocation · 21/04/2026 12:11

It sounds like she’s part of some bad online romance scam where she has to keep sending money - are you sure she knows these people??
I definitely wouldn’t be giving her money but I might be flagging it with your mum/her family

This. Be curious about exactly how much she’s giving away, to whom and why - she could easily be being taken advantage of and, although you did well to stay out of it, she may well need some help herself

JenniferAnistonnumber1fan · 21/04/2026 12:15

Itsalwayslocation · 21/04/2026 12:11

It sounds like she’s part of some bad online romance scam where she has to keep sending money - are you sure she knows these people??
I definitely wouldn’t be giving her money but I might be flagging it with your mum/her family

Highly doubt that

she is very bad with computers, doesn’t even social media and rarely uses internet

she also had the money to pay for her grandsons ex/baby moms Christmas holiday in nice resort and buy her a car

OP posts:
JenniferAnistonnumber1fan · 21/04/2026 12:17

Itsalwayslocation · 21/04/2026 12:11

It sounds like she’s part of some bad online romance scam where she has to keep sending money - are you sure she knows these people??
I definitely wouldn’t be giving her money but I might be flagging it with your mum/her family

Highly doubt that

she is very bad with computers. Doesn’t use internet much.

she also gifted her grandsons ex a car, money for plastic surgery not so long ago and holiday for Christmas (I know this for sure)

doesn’t sound like someone struggling…

OP posts:
B1anche · 21/04/2026 12:18

How do you know she did a sad face if she was phoning you?

JenniferAnistonnumber1fan · 21/04/2026 12:19

B1anche · 21/04/2026 12:18

How do you know she did a sad face if she was phoning you?

WhatsApp video call

OP posts:
LittleGreenDuck · 21/04/2026 12:20

Is this the same mum’s friend who isn’t paying for translation services? Style seems very familiar 🤔

toomuchfaff · 21/04/2026 12:21

She's definitely being scammed. Its not all computers, they ring you, they WhatsApp you.

She is being scammed.

Anyahyacinth · 21/04/2026 12:24

toomuchfaff · 21/04/2026 12:21

She's definitely being scammed. Its not all computers, they ring you, they WhatsApp you.

She is being scammed.

Yep...came to say this . Very sophisticated interactive scams...using video of the person asking and interactive conversations.
The lady sounds at risk to me

JenniferAnistonnumber1fan · 21/04/2026 12:25

Figcherry · 21/04/2026 12:13

Your 'friend' sounds like she's giving money away that she can't afford and is now running out and trying to continue the facade of wealthy benefactor.

My husband thinks this too

OP posts:
KnickerlessParsons · 21/04/2026 12:25

Itsalwayslocation · 21/04/2026 12:11

It sounds like she’s part of some bad online romance scam where she has to keep sending money - are you sure she knows these people??
I definitely wouldn’t be giving her money but I might be flagging it with your mum/her family

100% this. It was my first thought. It doesn't have to be via a computer.

JenniferAnistonnumber1fan · 21/04/2026 12:28

To all of you saying it might be a scam

what’s the scam though?

I don’t get it!?

and I don’t understand why she contacts me when she has many friends and relatives, adult kids and grandkids

friends much closer than me she can ask for money

and also she is financially well of herself. She boasts of this herself

Well off businessman husband left her money too and she showers her grandkids with nice gifts. Sends each few hundred a month, every month.

Like I said earlier, paid for her grandsons baby moms/ex Christmas holiday

OP posts:
PolkaDotPorridge · 21/04/2026 12:28

Why are people so keen to give their own money AND others money away on here lately?! I never lend money. Ever. Never a lender of a borrower be. Has served me well.

7238SM · 21/04/2026 12:29

I'd be having words with my sister if she told this 'friend' about your inheritance! WTF.

I'd also be warning my mum about this woman. Its clearly something dodgy, whether she believes it or not- keep away and avoid her.

CopeNorth · 21/04/2026 12:30

Is she vulnerable? Risk of a scam?

Tablesandchairs23 · 21/04/2026 12:30

Ignore her request she's taking the piss. She's an acquaintance asking for money for strangers. Tell her to jog on .

Mum2Fergus · 21/04/2026 12:31

JenniferAnistonnumber1fan · 21/04/2026 12:28

To all of you saying it might be a scam

what’s the scam though?

I don’t get it!?

and I don’t understand why she contacts me when she has many friends and relatives, adult kids and grandkids

friends much closer than me she can ask for money

and also she is financially well of herself. She boasts of this herself

Well off businessman husband left her money too and she showers her grandkids with nice gifts. Sends each few hundred a month, every month.

Like I said earlier, paid for her grandsons baby moms/ex Christmas holiday

Edited

Is she though? I think there is a potential welfare/safe guarding issue here.

Selloonacup · 21/04/2026 12:31

It also sounds like she might be a scam victim to me- could be a romance scam, investment scam, anything. If she's asking someone like you who she doesn't know well, she may be pretty desperate.

busyd4y · 21/04/2026 12:31

Is it start threads about lending money to friends day? What's that all about, this is the 3rd one I've read

Augarden · 21/04/2026 12:32

I worked for a bank and it definitely sounds like she's being scammed, I would alert her family if you can.

JenniferAnistonnumber1fan · 21/04/2026 12:33

busyd4y · 21/04/2026 12:31

Is it start threads about lending money to friends day? What's that all about, this is the 3rd one I've read

lol no I just saw that other thread and it motivated me me start my own

this happened a few months ago

OP posts:
Dollymylove · 21/04/2026 12:34

PolkaDotPorridge · 21/04/2026 12:28

Why are people so keen to give their own money AND others money away on here lately?! I never lend money. Ever. Never a lender of a borrower be. Has served me well.

That was my Dads favourite saying. I certainly wouldnt be splashing money around for someone I dont even know!!

Bjorkdidit · 21/04/2026 12:35

she brags that she has soooo many friends and how popular she is. She has friends much closer than me. She has relatives. Why not ask them

She probably has already asked them. If they've any sense, they've said no.

JenniferAnistonnumber1fan · 21/04/2026 12:39

My daughter is friends with her kids and grandkids

i know for a fact she sends all of them/each one a hundred to few hundred every month

“fun money”

in fact my daughter told me just recently her granddaughter bought drinks said it’s one me and talked about how nice her granny is spoiling her

OP posts: