to be fed up with how little I can eat now I’m menopausal?

[menno]

Since hitting menopause my metabolism seems to have just given up. I have to live on salads and protein twice a day to keep my weight stable.

I do weight training 3–4 times a week and exercise regularly. I guess that helps otherwise I would gain weight.

Last week I went out for a birthday dinner and also had afternoon tea and cake and I’ve put on 2kg. Now I have to go straight back to being super strict, like fish/meat and vegetables every night just to shift it again.

Pre-menopause I could eat more without watching everything. If I did gain, it would drop easily. Now it is hard work.

DH and teen DC put away huge amounts of food and I have to watch everything I am eating.

AIBU to find this really depressing and restrictive?

Same...and I have a skinny friend who doesn't seem to grasp that I'm not slightly overweight on purpose. I have Hashimotos, get masses of exercise (I cycle 30miles 3-4x per week)...but according to my BMI I'm slightly overweight (size 12-14) and I think I'd have to starve myself to lose weight. Not worth the misery. But I find it easier to relate to friends who can empathize, not the ones who eat anything and still look like someone out of Selling Sunset...

Yep I get it. I love running and it’s so quick and easy. But it doesn’t help me with muscle mass or keeping weight in check unfortunately.

I have had to commit to doing weights at home. You don’t need a home
gym just a few sets of dumbbells and half an hour or so is enough. I aim for 3 times a week but should really do 4. Then I walk the dog and that is my cardio. This is after years and years of running and other cardio. Resting heart rate still low so it’s enough.

I'd rather be a bit on the chunky side than live like that tbh.

It’s also a dilemma as we know what we should be eating for health but to try and fit it in cals wise is very tricky. So then it becomes another things to beat ourselves with. I’ve stuck to my cals but I’ve not had enough fibre or oily fish or whatever.

I would be seeking treatment for your weird view of what looks good!!!

I have been chunky and just felt uncomfortable all the time. My legs would rub together and I had rashes. My stomach was sticking out a lot - I would even get asked if I was pregnant. I would rather keep an eye on what I eat than go back to that.

I like Bountys... To be honest I'm generally so hungry that I even like the idea of Haribo...

Then I'm all out of ideas, sorry.

The only other thing I can think of is that you're underestimating what you eat/eating very high calorie food without realising 🤷‍♀️

I get that you feel uncomfortable at a certain weight but it sounds like losing weight is also very uncomfortable, in the sense that you have to restrict to an unpleasant extent. It may work out better for you to come to terms with being a little heavier than you like and maintaining at a higher weight rather than constantly trying to lose weight?

It's also almost impossible to get enough fibre on a low carb diet, especially bearing in mind the NHS guidelines are really the minimum you should be eating.

Did you say you were 55kg? How much did you weigh when you were "chunky?! I haven't been that small since I was about 14.

It been tough I won’t lie. It’s been very very gradual and the side effects…. Sheesh.

I’ve taken a very long term view. However it has shown DH and myself that all the comments I have had in the past about portion control, not exercising, and being a pear shaped girl have all been discredited. It’s stopped the food noise mainly, which went into overdrive when I hit 40 and started HRT.

When mum got breast cancer and I piled on all the weight, I decided to change. It all goes back on if I stop the GLP-1 but keep up with the new routine. My body can’t fight the weight gain even with all the best advice and effort.

I wish more was done to understand the why.

I’ve done no sugar, fasting, no carbs keto and pretty much everything else. The needle moves slow on my scales.

I would love to know how many of you are actually overweight and how many of you are simply annoyed that you are now 9.5 stone instead of 8.

if you eat 2kg of food, even 2 kg of fat and sugar, you CANNOT put on 2kg

I wish I could eat high calorie food!

You absolutely can eat high calorie food. But you're convinced you have to stay at a certain weight so you're not allowing yourself to eat it. It's not a can't situation, it's a won't situation.

I was 66kg when I was chunky - that was in the obese category.

I am now 55.8 which is still in the overweight category according to the NHS BMI calculator.

Are you 2 foot tall?!

My TDEE will keep dropping as I get older so if I am a little heavier now that could be a lot heavier later.

This

That's not really how it works - your weight will only keep going up and up if your intake of food keeps going up and up. If it were possible for people to keep gaining weight indefinitely on the same food, world hunger would be solved!

I honestly think some of you are screwing up your metabolism (amongst other things) by eating so little.

If your TDEE drops as you age, it is because your activity levels are dropping, and you have not put enough focus on building and maintaining muscle, and/or have not eaten enough to build/maintain muscle. It's not because you've aged, that is not how metabolism works.

Possibly but I think there is a huge under estimation of cals consumed going on too.

I also think if you can't eat more than 1200 calories at 55kg without putting on weight then maybe you need to accept you aren't actually supposed to be that size.