I had no idea that my friend is a multi millionaire!!

[shockedpuppy]

Been friends for 35+ years. Both from "normal" working class backgrounds. I found out today, that her DH's business turned over £100 Million last year. Yes, One Hundred Million, it's not a typo.

They have a nice house in the South East, worth maybe £700k. There are no obvious signs of such wealth. They are not big spenders. We were at a party with them last month, and they were (as usual) quite slow to get the drinks in when it was their turn. We definitely got in more rounds. Gifts at Christmas are especially frugal, I normally receive something that has obviously been recycled as it's so bizarre, or it's obviously a freebie with another purchase.

I had been feeling quite good recently about money, as we pay off our mortgage later this year (house worth about £340k for context), and we will have a reasonable amount in savings. Now I just feel a bit Meh, as we will never attain anything like this. Just one million would do me, lol. I know comparison is the thief of joy, but I feel absolutely positively green with envy.

They will be able to do things for their 3 daughters when the time comes, like buy them homes outright - something we can't do.

We are all in our 50's, if that's of any relevance.

Not if he’s a significant shareholder, he’ll take lots of dividends. Are you a CFO of a comparable company?

I hate all this comparison is the thief of joy Protestant bullshit mentality

They have significantly more money, yet choose to shirk buying drinks and give crappy recycled Christmas gifts?

Come on

We all know you are…..

Brilliant 😆

Yes I’m sure 😂😂😂😂😂

Honestly, I’m happy.

It doesn’t sound like they are spending in the way you describe. As it’s in a business it could be lost if times are tough. I wouldn’t be impressed if my friends were looking up how much my business was worth and discussing it. Sometimes we need to be happy with what we have!

What's even worse than this is expecting your friends to give you expensive gifts and wanting to end the friendship if they dont. Basing friendships on how much money they spend on you is parasitic and transactional AF.

I’m not. I own it.

Glad you’re trying to join the dots though > 😂

The business net worth.

depending on kind of business a lot of it could be tied up in assets such as buildings/machinery etc.

seems like you have seen a headline & rushed to conclusions. Turnover, profit and net worth are different things. He could pay himself like 100k a year & so not really taking money from the business & why they don’t appear as ‘wealthy’ as you have judged.

I say this a lot on here but comparison is the thief of all joy. You are paying your mortgage off this year, have savings etc. there will be plenty out there reading your post thinking, ‘I’ll never attain that’

Agree. It always reads as wildly insecure.

So what?

You think they shouldn’t have it because you don’t.

I like that your friend doesn’t come off as having money, why should they buy you drinks? Wild.

We could just be happy and laugh a lot.

Being stingy is such a huge turn off, I don’t envy stingy people. What is the bloody point of being rich if you hold onto it for dear life. Depressing and uncouth.

I would be asking what husbands business is and working out how to do that myself.

I know so many people who are much, much wealthier than me. It comes with its own issues — as does having a house gifted by parents etc. If what you are envious of is their ability to provide security for children, start planning it for your family. If it's more, 'their bowl has more soup than mine', get over it. Hoarding wealth, like any other type of hoarding, is a mental instability.

Did you have an issue with them before you knew they had money? Maybe the gifts aren’t great as they don’t consider you to be close friends and they’re just tokens.

Personally think it’s worse when people go around flaunting their money. I have a friend who’s always saying I’ll get this or I’ll pay for that but in a way that sounds like you obviously can’t afford it me and my pots of money will pay (we can of course pay our share or we wouldn’t be there!)

The net worth is the “book value”of the business - simply put the value of the assets minus the liabilities at a point in time. This can be very different from the “market value” of the business but yes, your friends could possibly liberate multi millions if they sold

Apart from it being none of your business I’m guessing your reaction is why she didn’t tell you. I suggest you find a place for your jealousy because it will impact your friendship if you are not careful.

Probably not.

Why are you so angry because they have done well? It seems like you hate her. She sounds nice to not be super flashy look at my money.

But the furniture might look like IKEA.

This

Quite! The funny thing is, I DO have my own business!! 😂 I’ve run a successful business for years. It’s just much lower key than my friends DH! I don’t know why people make assumptions on here?

You don't know the difference between turnover and profit and yet you claim to run a business?

Exactly! I just don’t believe posters saying that. My friend has never given any indication that the business was this large and I’ve never thought to look it up. We live very ordinary lives, very middle of the road. I thought that all of my friends were in a similar page financially so of course this is a shock. Will I ever say anything? Of course not! Will I ever ask for a hand out? Fuck no! We are fine financially. I’m allowed to be shocked surely.

I’m one of those posters. My shock isn’t that you are surprised- it’s that you were sufficiently nosy to go digging for information on something that has literally nothing to do with you