Dh in mood as I said I may get mcdonalds for my dinner he said its selfish

[Tomcdonaldaornot]

Hey mn!
I have just read some other posters complaining about their partners wow there seems to be a lot. I don't want that to cloud my judge ie being angry on their behalf and therefore my dh is wrong.
So I am asking here.
My baby who is 9months woke at 830am and hasn't napped today. She fought her last two naps and I have wasted an hr each time trying to get baby to nap. She usually naps but the last few days she seems more active. With no naps I have found it really impacts my night when baby doesn't nap, she has a bad night. So I have gotten ready. Dh who works from home popped downstairs and asked how day is going. I said its been full on she hasnt napped! He looked at her and said "cheeky" she laughed!
I said I was going a drive as she will nap in the car. I said I was thinking of getting a Starbucks via drive thru so I am not just driving around. At least it'll give me a destination! Then I thought ohh i could get a McDonald's! That'll sort my dinner out. Baby will nap in car. Dh then told me that was weird. I'm a grown women. And then.... wait for it... what about him? I offered to bring him mcdonalds and he said no. I then laughed and said you are a grown man I'm sure you can sort dinner. He stormed away saying "dont treat me like a child!".
Am i wrong?! He has never acted like this!!!!!!
What would you do??

Babies bring out a lot of emotions in people. Don’t sweat it. It’s a hard time when your baby is that age. New children can be testy for relationships. Don’t sweat the small stuff and you’ll be ok…

Man child!

Boycott McDonald’s and Starbucks!! They’re supporters of genocide

I've tried to go all the way through these posts.

Fuck all of them.

Eat your Macdonalds and enjoy.

FFS.

Oh my, the number of McDonald's I've had during a car nap. Countless. I don't get anything for anyone else. It would be cold, and if they want the McDonald's, they can do the drive! 😂

@Tomcdonaldaornot did you post yesterday too, about your DH checking for dust in the house?

No you're not wrong. Please don't fall into that trap of caving in for a happy life. You need to speak with him and say if you want to drive around to get baby to sleep and pop into a pub/restaurant/shop/fast food outlet/ late night shopping etc you will and you don't need his permission to do it.

As another poster said this is a crossroads moment - on the face of it, it sounds trivial to some people but he’s revealed several things to you:

He’s become grumpy when you prioritized your own needs - sleep rather than sex, a drive through take away rather than making him dinner.

It’s not bad that he was disappointed the early night didn’t mean sex or being irritated that he might have to fend for himself in the kitchen for once - normal human reactions.

But what he didn’t do was process those negative feelings alongside empathy/sympathy for his exhausted spouse.

He let himself feel hard done by and in his mind neglected which let the early night disappointment manifest into victimhood ‘pity McDonalds’ then processed into anger and revenge - eating the baby snacks.

That he jumped so quickly to the drama of threatening to go to a hotel is why I don’t think you can just brush this off.

If he apologizes, I’d give him one benefit of the doubt.

But I’d watch out for this type of behaviour. You have good boundaries which is great - keep an eye out for signs that he doesn’t like it when you prioritize your needs over his.

It's really not trivial. It's a behaviour pattern which is likely to escalate.

You should say you used baby milk to make the pastries. 🤣 I once lied and told my partner I used breast milk to make these muffins for my daughter when I actually made them for myself. Him and his friend were building a shed in our back garden and they would have ate them all. I was too pregnant to want to share.

Also you did nothing wrong. You need to get out and have a break. My son didn't sleep much and going out for a cheeky McDonald's was the only time I got to eat in peace.

I hope you messaged back saying your were tuning up your tiny violin. 93% agree with you.

Hopefully it’s all blown over today and you’ve got some naps in OP (or better still it’s a nursery day!)

Baby would as you said nap in car

Hope you are ok

Yes, similarly when I was on maternity leave and husband had to go back to work, he'd come home, cook dinner and then spend time either with our child or doing some housework; whichever I preferred.

OPs husband sounds incredibly immature and selfish. Instead of offering to lighten her load hes thrown a hissy fit because she didnt immediately ask him if he wanted maccys, then escalated it to an argument by way of deliberately eating food he knew was for their child.
He could have offered to drive the non-sleeping child and picked up food, to give OP a break. He could have cooked some food for them both, or spent time with the baby whilst she ordered a takeaway.
He could have apologised for being an absolute arse.

He's just realising the consequences of his actions and trying to make anyone other than himself in some way accountable.

It is really tough when your baby doesn't sleep (I don't have babies any more but I go through bouts of insomnia and the difference it makes to the day if I sleep well is incredible). I think the thing is that sometimes the person who has been "working" all day (albeit from home) often does expect to be looked after by the person who has been "home" all day (even if they're looking after a baby). If he isn't normally like this then he may just be frustrated that he isnt going to get a home cooked meal (if that is what you usually do?). That may seem unfair to you (and I get that, you're sleep deprived and your baby is probably over stimulated and possibly more demanding). I'd maybe offer to get him fish and chips if he doesn't want McDonalds and put it down to just the usual stresses of having a child - it's tough for both mums and dads.

Yeah stand your ground and nip this in the bud soon. Does he have baby for full days often?

You should be a team and he’s playing mind games over getting less attention than the baby. He needs to grow up

Comprehension skills on her are decreasing by the day!

Oh god what a bellend he is.
Sorry OP.

Why couldnt he have gone for the drive with you?

I love having a brew or a snack whilst baby is sleeping in the car 🤣 he's being dramatic!

Hrft but this, absolutely this, you're tired, frazzled, be nice if soneone got your dinner for you, but if you have to take baby out to nap McD is very reasonable.

I also recommend the chicken selects, much nicer than nuggets.

Have done this myself a few times to get a baby to nap, or to prolong car nap.
Enjoy your macdonalds and forget hubby acting like a child

You can have whatever you like, whenever you like from wherever you like and dont need to justify yourself at any time, he's a grown man and can also make decisions all on his own... sounds like a man baby expecting you to get home and put his meal on the table, prepare for a wee sulk the night

Am I reading a different post to you?

I hope you're ok. You're absolutely not being unreasonable. You say he's not usually like this but sometimes men show another side once a baby is here so keep your wits about you. Red flags may be lurking that you haven't even noticed. Stand your ground now or before you know it this could be someone who cancels a day out with your child to get to you for some other imaginary wrong doing. Take care