Only knickers in the Co-op

[1981RickyVilla]

A teenage girl (aged 15 or 16, roughly) in front of me in the Co-op was wearing a crop-top and a pair of knickers only. Not bikini bottoms, not short shorts but cotton M & S midi style knickers. I didn’t say anything (none of my business and she probably wouldn’t have approved my sartorial choices either). If I had been her mother, seeing her before she left the house, I would have said that it looked unhygienic and wasn’t an appropriate way to go to the shops.
YABU: People of whatever age can dress how they like when they go to the Co-op.
YANBU: A mini-skirt or pair of shorts are a minimum requirement when you’re off to the shops.

I can remember some wild outfits in the late 80’s and early 90’s.
One girl I remember used to be at raves completely topless with tiny cycling shorts on.
A girl in a nightclub in a tiny bikini.
Loads of thongs under completely transparent trousers or skirts.
However, the outfits were only at night.
Nobody was whacking round the Co-op in knickers.
Think I might give it a go. Not sure my neighbours are ready for me in Sloggis but if you can’t beat em, join em?

Where was this? It was 13C maximum with a cold wind where I live in the UK yesterday. Supermarkets are freezing when it's warm out.

Sounds like another completely made up lot of bollocks by very odd and unpleasant misogynistic individuals to me. Reported.

They all wear cycling shorts underneath. Thats why

Women and girls can of course wear what they want. The question is why they want to wear it. They will tell you "it's comfortable" (if it were comfortable, men would wear it) or "I like how I feel when I dress this way". But again, what exactly is that feeling? Where does it come from? Why do you like it?

I feel sorry for teens as they get pressure from all sides. I see girls I know going out practically naked and then coming back in tears because men were leering at them, passing comments, taking photos. I mean yes, women should be free to wear what they like, but on the other hand, when you're going into the shark-tank, it's just smart not to wear a bikini made of raw meat.

I’m laughing at the idea that the weather would deter young people from wearing exactly what they want. Where I live on the east coast of Scotland it’s normal for young lads to go topless at a blink of sunshine, while adults are still layering up with fleeces. In fact the phrase “taps aff!” is a thing. And young women here go to school in winter wearing dark tights and the skimpiest of skirts that only just cover their bum cheeks. It’s not misogynistic to state these observable facts.

I've mentioned to my teens a few times over the years "you can wear what you want but people WILL be staring at you, and not just pretty teenage boys but also leering unpleasant men thinking unpleasant thoughts about you. If you are ok with that, then that's fine but you need to be aware that it's definitely happening."
Has resulted in costume adjustments before leaving the house several times.

Did you tell the boys off for swearing too?

Did you tell the boys off for swearing too?

I’m so torn on his. On the one hand i firmly believe girls and women should wear what they want and sod the male gaze!! But on the other hand i do feel they are demeaning themselves when they have their bums hanging out.

In secondary? No they don’t. In year 7 and possibly 8 as well, but beyond that, these get ditched in favour of thongs. Skirts generally if bought in year 7 and pleated or skater style, can just get progressively shorter as legs grow longer and hips fill out.

It does rather stretch credulity doesn't it? I mean, very small hot pants style shorts, yes, they are indeed fashionable. But no 15 year old girl would wear a big pair of M&S knickers as a fashion choice. So either the OP mistook the skimpy shorts for underwear, there was something amiss with the girl, or the OPs imagination has run away with them.

Grim. Even if it is fashionable.

The poster is 61 so born mid 1960’s. I doubt she would remember the mini skirt ‘fuss’.

Yes, I said this to my dd when younger. Kids can be so unaware. And it’s actually uncomfortable for anyone male or female. As a woman, it makes me uneasy, because it makes a girl / young woman vulnerable to predators / unwanted attention. And I’m sure plenty of men feel uncomfortable, because they don’t want to put a foot wrong, and be accused of doing something wrong around them.

To add to that, I don’t think it’s even about remembering a certain era. I think the point @LunaTheCat was making isn’t so much about the actual clothes, it’s about the power of the media to get these girls / young women to dress in such a uniform way.

I once wore very short shorts, a bralette, and a fishnet top in order to persuade a guy I was dating to come to a gig with me- he had agoraphobia and did come because I looked hot AF but went off to have a panic attack during the gig (oops, I had imagined he'd adapt). I wouldn't wear stuff like that now but it's fun when you're young- mid-twenties, no kids back then- and cool.

OP didn’t specify when this took place. The weather here has been spring like but still quite cold and windy. It doesn’t seem to deter the teens because as soon as the sun comes out the skimpy outfits appear.

I agree. Not because women can’t wear what they want but because young women are not aware of the bigger picture. They are thinking in a context of their own friend circle and social media. If nobody tells them otherwise, they don’t have all the info they need to decide how they want to present themselves to the world. In that way it’s similar to youngsters wearing clothes that aren’t suitable for the workplace. If nobody tells them they’re not dressed appropriately for work, they will naturally assume that what they’re wearing is acceptable.

It was 23 degrees in London last week. Very warm.

Agree. I think young girls unfortunately are dressing for male attention, not themselves. It's not "empowering", it's social media.

I think this must be a thing. When I came out of the cinema yesterday there was a young woman pushing a pram wearing just red pants on her lower half.

I take it you’ve never been to Newcastle?

I was in Newcastle recently, in full parka, hat, gloves and still feeling chilly. Gosh there was some flesh on display from the youngsters.

I am always so fascinated by the body positivity of today's "processed food" raised youngsters, some of who are significantly larger than people I knew in my youth.

How do they they honestly ever expect to be taken seriously?
It'll just be phase they are going through.
After years of working with teens, one things for sure, how they behave and dress at 14 is completely different by the time they are 18, 21, 25.
Its not a great phase admittedly when they are going out in public dressesd like Bianca.Censori but they will grow out of it.

At my place of work the bedrooms and TV and rooms are upstairs. One teenage girl wears thongs. We would know this even if we didn't do her clothes washing as her skirts are so short her bum cheeks are lower than the hem of the skirt. It's a sight if you are behind her on the stairs. After the first time it happened I made sure she was at the top before I went near the stairs after that!

I think that’s a good way to explain it to them actually. It’s natural for people to look at others regardless of what they’re wearing.