10 month old DH said i am being lazy.

[ILoveFatFaceSocks]

When DD (10months) wakes, I change her and then give her milk. I then pop her in her playpen where she happily plays with toys. I then make a coffee and watch some TV - play pen is infront of TV (well TV in on wall, playpen is infront of couch). I sometimes just watch her and occassional look up at TV sometimes I will watch the TV. I enjoy having my morning coffee and she is happy playing. After 30mins / 1hr or so I then take her through to kitchen where I give her actual breakfast, porridge, yoghurt, etc.
DH wfh and when walking past livingroom popped head in to say hi. He looks shocked thst I had a coffee and was lying on sofa watching TV. He asked was mummy having a day off and that the play pen isnt for me watching TV and that im being lazy. I was so annoyed. Is he right?

You’re the one that called lots of posters fat thick bitches aren’t you? Ah ok. Not someone I think I’ll engage with

I didn't use the word fat. Again, yet another one who is unable to comprehend.

@Posner Yet you followed me on another thread I posted on. Thought you didn't want to engage?

Independent play is essential for baby to develop problem solving skills in the future. As is an older child being bored. This is why we have a nation of children who struggle to cope with any inconvenience and need so much hand holding.
when my child started at childcare, a task I was given was to encourage independent play as the carer couldn’t see to each individual child at the same time in some instances. We worked hard on it. And sometimes that meant me sitting and relaxing for a short period when they played by themself (as a 10 month old).

Yes you did
Deleted now

Just ignore it, it gets pathetic.

Half of them probably have theirs sitting all day with earphones in watching some cartoon while they scroll their SM - and that's the ones who even have children, which it seems some of the critics don't.

Children need plenty of quality input, but there are also times when parents need to go to the loo, cook dinner, field a phone call, have a cup of tea etc and this is a perfectly appropriate time to employ some other assistance to keep them safe in the form of screen or play pen.

It doesn’t sound as if you are doing anything wrong at all OP. Tell H to F off!
As for ‘what are you teaching her’? That downtime is fine and normal - not that she’ll even remember anyway at that age.

No I didn't call anybody fat as I wouldn't know. Bit ironic since your post on the other thread stalking me was deleted.

No one called anyone fat
You lot are unhinged

Are you and your husband still fighting about this?

Youre taking offence to a word that wasnt even used
Thats on you.
If you are fat.. erm okay, your issue not mine so do something about it instead of picking fights
If you aren't fat then wtf

"Still fighting"
I didnt even say we were!!
You okay????

Ok so are you still very annoyed at him?

I guess I hate he is so opinionated when he has never cooked for her so hasnt come up against this but is telling me im being lazy!

what a catch

You clearly have mental health issues
X

Thank you.

It's frightening, isn't it? Some lovely posters on this thread but some downright nasty comments. So sorry you've experienced this posting a reasonable and fair situation. You sound a lovely mum who is very unappreciated. Fair enough to disagree, but the nastiness....So much for solidarity. I pity them as they're clearly insecure and can't be as perfect as they make out.

As an aside, Fat Face is brilliant!

Life can tough, take a lie down or your medication x

Its anonymous so you do expect disagreement and the odd rude poster. It's just batshit crazy when people are just nasty or make stuff up like poster above... so they stalked you on other thread??

And thanks I do love fat face. I only have some clothing items from there. It is mostly socks. I think i have a wee ff sock obsession

You did say thick meaning stupid obv not thick as in fat so it just prove you right... thick people 😂😂

I'm a mum of 6 worh a huge gap between the first 2 and the last 4. I think it's fair to say I've used a variety of approaches.

First and foremost OP, as long as you're committed to your child and I'm pretty persuaded you are, there is no one way to "correctly " do this age group. You'll look back at this age one day and it will mostly be a blur woth some vivid aspects standing out. It is a marvel to me that we women somehow adapt to little sleep and still function. It's akin to torture when you're going through it but it passes. My fourth child and first daughter was a nightmare in terms of sleep and wanted me all the time. It got quite exhausting so I bought a musical wind up mobile and created sleep rituals.
At ten months she might be transitioning to one daytime nap. I'd try and get her down at 12 or 1pm for a few hours. Create a rourine around sleep. Playtime, lunch, wash , lights dimmed in her room, wind up mobile. Sit with her and pat her back until she falls asleep for the first 3 to 5 days with the mobile on. Gradually you refuce the time you spend comforting her to fall asleep until you aren't required as a sleep cue. The musical mobile, dimmed lights and routine are her sleep cues. They will try and test the line. Keep tones soft but firm and try not to talk while you're setting the routine. It takes time, patience and consistency but it's possible. Bedtime for evening is similiar; dinner, warm bath, story. Dimmed lights, musical mobile, staged withdrawal.
Nothings perfect but the aim is manageable. My daughter is 13 now and she still absolutely loves mums hugs which I'm certainly not complaining about.

Exactly.

Yes, the poster searched another thread I posted on and replied negatively.

I know right haha!

Fat Face socks are great! There's some very colourful ones! You can never have too many!

Haha. I thought exactly the same about you reading your comments.
To be honest with you it was the ridiculousness of claiming that primary aged children had problems with emotional regulation if they hadn't been "left to fuss".

And then the self-righteousness of claiming you were "reaping rewards" and your children and those who had followed your methods were all thriving whilst the poor breastfed, co-sleeping babies who weren't "left to fuss" were all knackered and unable to emotionally regulate 5-10 years later.

I don't cosleep but I do breastfeed on demand and don't let her fuss so I guess it did strike a nerve because you're talking utter rubbish with some kind of authority.

Again, glad your kids are thriving but there was no need to put others down initially and the fact you think that your "sleep training" has had a positive impact years later is utter bollocks I'm sorry to say.

If I was in this kind of relationship, yes I imagine I would find life tough 💐

If it helps you feel better (although I’m not sure why I triggered you so hard), I did it because eldest was a terrible sleeper. She had colic and screamed solidly for the first 12 weeks which killed my mental health, then nap time became highly regimented because if she didn’t sleep at set times of the day she was inconsolable.

She is an awesome teen, but likely neurodiverse and easily overstimulated which may explain why we needed blackout blinds, swaddle, hairdryer noise etc. but it is also true that when we cracked self soothing she has been a great sleeper. The word ‘strict’ which appears to have triggered you to the point you aren’t reading my posts through your rage cloud was on myself and my husband, not my kids. But yeah, after many many hours of standing by cots and gradually creeping out the room over weeks and months it did work. Wasn’t easy, certainly had set backs, requires huge commitment etc.

I’m sorry my kids not being emotionally disregulated by my outdated actions causes you such anger. If you are a crunchy mum who wears your kids and home schools then go you, that is fabulous for you.

We are all trying to get through this life with kids who can go out in the world and live their fabulous best lives. If I can pass on to mums to ignore the sanctimonious ‘baby experts’ following the latest fad (which will be labelled outdated and damaging in a decade from now so enjoy your righteous moment), and that there is no guilt in sleep training for your own sanity and your kid won’t be scarred for life because you stuck Peppa pig on in the background when you were knackered, then I’ll share. Here’s the thing, if you disagree that is totally cool, look away, ignore me. but you don’t need to attack me for being out of date. My kids are teens, I’m hardly parenting from the Stone Age.