AIBU that I am upset over a tattoo design?

[Lemonypaintpots]

Hello,

sorry this is a little long so please bear with me!

Backstory- I am currently doing an illustration degree, as a mature student and the rise of AI was right around my first year. It is well known that AI has stolen many artworks that are published online to feed into their generators and AI is a big threat to illustrators. My husband and I have had many conversations about AI and he knows my views and knows I do NOT want my work put into any of these. I am a quiet and introverted person, and I don’t generally show my work much to anyone but I am gradually building up more confidence. I have loved art and drawing all my life and by no means new to it,

Moving on to the tattoo- He specifically asked if he could do one of my drawings- and requested a few alterations, which I did. He seemed very happy with the design, and booked in to get it done. I was having a small tattoo done as well so we booked to share a time slot.

Well yesterday was tattoo day. I checked again with him in the morning that he was happy with the design. He said he was, and that he was going to have a small alteration- to add my name into it. As there is a space where this could work, I thought nothing more of it, as I know the tattooist could easily incorporate it.

We got to the studio and began filling out the forms. Whilst he was filling his out, the tattooist asked which design he was going for- mine or the AI. This was news to me and I wondered what was going on. He immediately said, the AI one and asked my opinion. The tattooist showed me the screen with the AI image. I was mortified. I was completely put on the spot, and on the screen was this image with the same items as my drawing, but completely different style. It was very obvious it was AI, the positions had all changed as well, and he could see my reaction wasn’t positive. He tried to explain himself, saying that mine wasn’t very clear so he ran it through AI to sharpen it up. But It’s a completely different image. I just said, well it’s your tattoo so go for whatever you are happy with.

I went off to have mine done, silently furious he put my work into AI, and so embarrassed- that he told me he wanted my design- was it not good enough? I was also embarrassed that he put me on the spot, and that my name was going to be put in the middle of an AI image after hours of hard work making a design.

Later on he showed me, and honestly, It looks AI. When we got home, I expressed my views about AI again, and asked why he did it. He genuinely didn’t expect my reaction, and claimed he forgot to tell me that he ran it through, that he wanted the elements to be different proportions, and sees this AI image as my design. It only has the same objects in- it looks nothing like my style or design at all. Bear in mind I asked several times if there were any changes to be made, and he kept saying no. I explained how I felt, why it bothers me etc. We both hate confrontation, so he just shut down conversation about it and nothing more has been mentioned about tattoos at all. I noticed he has chosen to keep it covered up since. He seems to genuinely not understand my reaction, and I am just so embarrassed that he chose AI, embarrassed that my name is in the middle of it when it’s not my work, and most of all I am disappointed that he hid this all from me until the moment- he clearly knew my opinion and we have never hid things from each other. It’s not like I didn’t ask if there were any further alterations either! It has completely put me off finishing my degree, if my own husband cannot even support me over AI-

So AIBU?

Controlling? (I hate that word)

He asked to use her design
He asked for a couple of changes - she complied
She asked if he was happy with it or did he want anything else changed - No
He knows how she feels about AI (quite rightly)
And they went to the tattooist, he'd put it through AI and changed it and he put her on the spot over it
Now he won't talk about it

And she's controlling?

It is to her.

He's asked to use her work, taken it and changed it artificially even though she'd have adapted it for him.

That's a big deal

I use AI for my small business, adding in a different colour background, or removing unwanted shadows or changing the wording on my photos of a personalised item to save wasting blanks for photos. This use does not use anything that is from other peoples work I wouldn’t generate images or stories or anything like that. I know AI has its uses. Art/Illustration in my opinion is not one of them- there are talented hard working artists out there for that.

He's altered her work artificially and she's supposed to feel 'honoured'?

I think theres probably two factors at play

1. your reaction. The comment about giving up your degree, the low self confidence that comes through, the allowing him to have it then seething about it afterwards (to the extent he is hiding it from you) suggests to me that perhaps feedback isn't as easy as you think it is. Especially if your default is to devalue yourself as an artist

2. People have different relationships with ai, and you also use it for fine tuning stuff. To a lay person outside of the industry they may not see the difference between you using it to change a back ground, and them using it to change a font or size of a flower for example.
   I have found that lots of people have really poor ai recognition, and will actually struggle to see half of the differences ai makes. Its possible he really feels like its still your design at heart, with little tweaks.

Recently we were sent a photo of some birds put through ai, the prompt was simple which wasnt about changing the image. Im not an artist but am familiar with the birds. Immediately I was like oh its changed the pose of that one, and could see things like legs being changed, wings no longer correct. However everyone else in our group, accepted it as the same photo with just a filter on.

My general take is that you are right to be annoyed but don't blow it out of proportion.

I completely understand your point of view. I would be sore about this for years. I'm the creative one in my family and yes I'm not amazing and you could get better artists or AI but my family love my drawings and tattoo designs because I did them. He basically chose AI over you. The tattoo is now not sentimental and will be a constant reminder that your efforts and creativity don't mean anything.

I get your hatred of AI- I work in the creative industries, and it's a pile of shite- but I do think that the biggest problem here is communication. When he asked you at the tattoo studio what you thought, you should have felt comfortable and confident enough to say, 'I don't like the use of AI and I don't want my name on your tattoo if you're going down that route.'
I spent many years in a marriage I thought was brilliant, with a man I thought was lovely- we never had a proper argument. I had no idea how unhealthy that was. When the big disagreements finally arose, we weren't equipped to deal with it, because we'd suppressed our anger and upset about the small stuff. In subsequent relationships, I've had to train myself to be allowed to be vehement about stuff, to fall out, to really say how I feel even if it's not easy for the other person to hear. It's made a big difference!

I'm gonna say YABU, because it's his body his choice... You do sound a bit like those people who self publish a novel, and want everyone to read it (and say it's wonderful!)

Even so, I think you're very brave (or bonkers - I can't figure out which one) to do an illustration degree, when AI has been so dominant this decade. You are going to really struggle to get work. If I was only in the first year, I would probably quit too, truth be told, and find another subject to do, and then I would start a fresh degree.

JMHO.

.

honestly you might as well quit if you’re not going to critically think about AI and how it can complement what you do. It’s here and it’s only getting better. A hatred of it will just make you miserable.

also YABVU to not tell your DH your feelings before he got the tattoo permanently on his body. Poor guy.

What are you going to do about it OP?

Are you thinking of LTB?

Yeah that sounds bonkers to me , but as you can tell , A LOT of thought goes into my tattoos. However , it could just be that in this instance the generated image matched his “vision” on the first try. It’s rare, but it has been known to happen. I’m sure you can relate to that feeling of seeing something ( that possibly you can’t even properly describe ) and thinking this is it!

I would talk to him, not about his use of AI, but about hiding it from you , because in my eyes that’s the bigger issue.A calm, reasonable conversation about why he felt he had to hide it and see what you can unpick from there.

Do you think the AI 'style' might be what he was going for? Just wondering if he's seen a lot of AI designed tattoos lately and he's subconsciously picked up the idea that that's what tattoos look like.

Still a shitty thing to do though. I have different views on AI and barely know you, but having heard how you feel about AI, I wouldn't put your work into it.

I think that your husband was extremely inconsiderate and I also think that it is a subject that most people don’t understand about your particular field of expertise.

The Good Ship Illustration and their podcasts are very helpful, if you have not already come across them? https://www.thegoodshipillustration.com

AI slop is everywhere now and it’s so obvious. The butty shop by my work has now got a horrendous over-saturated logo plastered all over it and it looks tacky and puts me off.

A close family member of mine is an established graphic designer. They were in high demand, work for an agency and used to freelance.

The freelance work has dried up because clients are just using AI. Their work at the agency has changed and they spend most of their day feeding prompts into AI - which they hate.

That industry has changed fast and that’s probably worth knowing if you’re studying in it.

I think your husband was unreasonable.

With all due respect, this very much sounds like you are regularly feeding your work through ai

It will have stored it, and use it in the future

Huge amount of disrespect from him. He knows very well how you feel about AI, he was given chances to tweak the work any way he wanted. Then he chose to add your name but literally turn it into something he knew you'd outright dislike. A new way of expressing disdain for someone right there.

I think you just have to make the best of it.

Finish your degree and carve out a business with the usp of not using AI. I'm petty enough that I'd use his tattoo as an example of AI mangling your work 💩

But its also a valuable lesson to both control your work with what you allow clients access to and enforce it in contract vs whether you control your own feelings and decide to let it slide.

As far as I can see, AI does produce brain rot in the people who use it, who lose both taste facilities and also confidence in their own judgment, to the point that they can't choose something if it hasn't been fed to them by AI. That's one of the (many) things I find alarming about AI, the way that it's removing people's ability to say not just "This is the one I like, deep in my soul I prefer it" but more importantly "It doesn't matter what the 'all-knowing' AI says, I can choose this myself with confidence and security".

All sorts of buyers, stylists, make up artists etc are commenting online that while in the past, people would come in and say "I love this [pink lipstick/green flares/velvet platforms], can you find me something like this", now they'll come in with what AI has told them they want, and even if AI has made up the item, they'll be extremely panicky and alarmed about finding something that suits them better, but hasn't been AI-tweaked and AI-approved

I wonder if something like this has happened with your husband: AI 'knows best', and therefore his tattoo had to be 'improved' by it before he went ahead with it.

Either way, I totally get why you're upset. Please finish your degree - good taste is going to become absolutely key over the next few years, as AI shows it has absolutely terrible taste, and you'll have the skills to show it off.

YANBU to feel the way you do.

YABVU not to have said something before your husband got it permanently tattooed on his body. That's a really shabby thing to do.

I agree it was disrespectful of him to choose an AI version of the design. I also agree it was disrespectful of him to put you on the spot about this too.

I would concentrate on those points when talking to him.

Finish your degree and try not to worry about AI too much.

A career in illustration has been difficult for many decades now (I am in the industry) long before AI became so prevalent. So, finish what you started and I wish you the best for the future.

If you work in the Arts you will need to develop a thick skin and the ability not to catastrophise, and be able to sell yourself. So my advice would be to work on that. Good luck

Gosh I didn’t ask him to use my work, he asked me for use of the design! It was an older drawing of mine that he apparently loved, and asked for edits to make it into a tattoo for him. I spent a long time making them (he didn’t know how long as I do most of my art when he’s elsewhere) and he said he was very happy with it. I checked several times, including the morning of the tattoo and the only thing he added was that he was going to ask for my name in it. Why ask someone to do hours and hours of edits for you just to use something else? If my design wasn’t right, he should have accepted more edits. If he felt the original image he liked was lost and no longer wanted to use it, he could have said he no longer wants to use it- not put my work into AI without asking. This is not just a regular client- I wouldn’t be offended if it was as they wouldn’t know me or my preferences- but my own husband who knows my views on AI for illustration uses- that hurts. Like I said in another post, if he is happy with it then I am happy with it- but it doesn’t change the feeling of betrayal and disrespect.
With my degree, I started it just months before AI exploded. Perhaps I should have seen it coming? I am in my 4th year now but doing it at home, so have up to 5 years to go. With not even my husband supporting traditional art over AI, I am aware that I am likely doing it just for self satisfaction now, hence why I wonder if it’s even worth the huge fees.

He has been a bit of a twat and you aren't being unreasonable to be upset but for goodness sake finish your degree.

Can he/would he have another tattoo over your name?

He was incredibly stupid to put your design into AI and not expect you to be upset!

God, this really got me thinking. And it is so depressing. I guess the reality is that, thanks to AI, training as an illustrator is radically less likely now to have economic benefit. But it seems like your husband's choices have struck you at a much deeper level.

Lots of people, especially mature students, are looking to deepen their creativity and express themselves more effectively in their developing skills, rather than just training for a career. It is a way of finding more meaning in life. And it seems like you feel that project has been eroded by your husband's choices. Your design was a way for him to see you and value you and he blew it.

Should that make you devalue your talents and devalue the project of developing them? The world will be an incredibly bleak place if humans no longer have the project of human-created beauty and insight as a way of making meaning in their life. I feel like we have to find a way of making AI's talents irrelevant to the assessments of our own creativity.

Would it be worth making a comparison with the beauty of nature and the universe? None of us can match that. All of our attempts are paltry and limited compared with that beauty. And AI's attempts certainly are. But that doesn't erode the value of our attempts, and I guess that may be because our human subjectivity and consciousness is part of how our creativity is assessed. Nature isn't art, because it doesn't have a creator (unless you believe in god). Similarly, nothing made by AI is art because it doesn't have a creator.

Your husband may have missed or devalued that characteristic of art, but that doesn't mean that it is lacking in reality.

Don't throw your toys out of the pram OP. You will regret not finishing your degree. Let yourself calm down. He knows he's fucked up.

But next time he asks for your help. Tell him no because he can't be trusted and he dented your confidence the last time.