AIBU to resent friend on UC living better than us?

[Sunshineandrainbows123]

I know I am being unreasonable but just need to rant and I’m aware that perception is different to reality. I’ve worked hard all my life, since I was 14, paid my way through uni to get a decent qualification and job at the end of it all. I bought a house with my partner but as with so many of us I feel like I can’t rub 2 pennies together. Meanwhile a close friend claims universal benefits, has minimum 4 holidays a year, 2-3 abroad, gets regular beauty treatments, a new car and is able to regularly take her children to the cinema, days out and buy them new clothes, trainers and toys. I feel like I took the wrong path sometimes - she doesn’t have to pay rent for the home they live in, or school lunches for her kids, there are so many discounts and opportunities afforded to those on UC that working families don’t get. I don’t know if it’s better to distance myself. I know I need to probably give my head a wobble.

The reason that anyone gets UC whether in work or out is that they qualify for it for some reason. Either they are living well below the line. Or their rent is very high. Or their income isn't enough. It's not just part time workers who get UC. There are people who work full time who qualify as well if their rents are very high - and there are millions of people who could claim benefits who don't - because they don't know they are entitled

Maybe people should put the figures through a calculator and see what people on part time wages actually get in top ups from UC before people assume that they are all living the high life

Again, there are myriad ways that governments raise revenue other than income tax.

Welfare states ensure stability for all. Do you want to live behind steel gates?

Again. I paid INTO the system in the form of taxes for decades. With respect. I'm not going to be shamed for claiming benefits - just because some random person on an Internet forum thinks that Im "living off other peoples labour"..

You stated that it's only childless people who shouldn't get benefits - so you're OK with parents and kids getting UC yes? You don't mind your taxes going to some of the population?

Why are you avoiding my question? Why is it ok for me to pay for you but you not to pay for others

Strange thread. You only want to be friends with people who don't claim UC. Don't forget lots of working people get UC too.

It's her business what she does. None of yours. She could be in debt for all you know as said it's none of your concern and your business it nine of hers.

Recently discovered similar. My family member was upset about her finances (works 3 days a week 21hrs) she has got herself into debt. Doesn't want to work more. She lives in a 3 bed council house. Rent paid as she's single parent to one 13 y/o.
Basically sorting out finances with her and discovered when we add up all her universal credit and minimum wage payment from her job she's brining home the same as my Husband after he's taxed. He earns 40k. She is always eye rolling me or saying I'm tight when I don't get the kids takeaways etc. But we are supporting 5 kids and 2 adults and the only debt we have is the mortgage. Yet on the same take home she has run thousands up on credit cards for just her and one child. I did always wonder how she afforded botox, constant hair appointments, clothes, expensive stuff in general. Spends hundreds on her child at Xmas and bdays and anything they want in-between.
Turns out she couldn't afford it eithe.

I think they way to do it is have a couple of kids with 2 ricjlh blokes and get a chunk of CMS from each of them. Another 1k a month on top of benefits and the other stuff paid for isn't a bad income

A large proportion of what she gets in that payment will be her rent element particularly if she's in private rented accommodation. Her own UC top up income won't be that much

Completely offensive to women who get nothing or very little from fathers for their kids.

I didn't say anything about childless people?

Perhaps people can get what they pain in?

Will always have the same response to this, if you think it's that fantastic try it!! Quit your job, get all the free stuff you're talking about. Let us know how rich you are after 😂 absolutely insane 😂 you should step back from your friend, she probably doesn't deserve a jealous judgemental friend

Quite offensive to women full stop really.

I have the impression you've not really thought this through very logically.

Yeah that does include her rent but she's in a council property think that was about £600pm she gets for that. I meant when we add all her income together, rent, wages abd UC she gets the same as as my husband who works 40hrs a week.

You said "a single person" - you actually meant no one rather than just single people then?

This is what I was thinking. If I honestly believed that I’d quit my job in a heartbeat! I think what OP is saying is “why aren’t they struggling starving and penniless” mind your own business OP comparison is the thief of joy! Maybe spend more time focusing on your OWN finances if you’re not happy with them!

Why people are so obsessed with other peoples finances is beyond me! I have a friend who has a decent job and her partner owns his own business. They go on holiday 4 x per year and my other friend (who doesn’t work and is single with 2 children) has accused the husband of being a drug dealer 😂 no proof but he “must be” people can’t stand anyone doing better than them it’s awful!

My mate on UC saves and budgets gets food from free apps, to good to go boxes ect, has no treats at all no hair cuts, takes aways, new clothes is strict with heating and electric no lights left on no stuff plugged in heating on once you already in layers and saves she saves religiously to take her child on holiday. Car is likely finanance as a reliable one is in the end cheaper then a banger. You aren't a very nice friend ..friends are happy for eachother and support eachother they aren't jealous and judgemental so yes end the friendship

It's nonsense though isn't it. When I was on UC (lockdown) I was absolutely broke. So she's not doing this on benefits.

Perhaps she’s doing black economy work to fund this lifestyle while still qualifying for UC on paper?

Comparison is the thief of joy, my friend, but there is definitely more to this. I wouldn’t waste energy thinking about it though.

People who say she is talking crap are utterly clueless - my friend has an income from uc most people could only dream of. She claims DLA for 4 kids for adhd and is always going abroad for various surgeries. I’ve seen her income first hand and it’s shocking

In what way. ?? I certainly don't find it offensive and I got the grand sum of a fiver for 14 years maintenance for 2 kids.

It's a different ball game if you get lots of money from fathers As a friend of mine managed

If she's working 21 hours a week and getting the living wage she would get around 24700 a year. She gets keeping her wages, she'll get 400 pounds a month Uc for herself, 292 for her child and assuming there's an in work allowance there is a taper of 55p in every pound applied after she gets keeping the sum of wages that the taper applies to

Around 11k of that figure will be on rent and her child element. I don't know her hourly rate so just assumed it was the living wage

I reckon she’s got an only fans account or a boyfriend contributing. She isn’t getting all that from UC.

The OP didn't say her friend was disabled