AIBU to expect DH to take DD to the party?

[Mrsmissunderstood]

DD has a party today DH said he wasn’t going from the moment we got the invite about a month ago. I’ve been ill for a week with a sinus infection so the house is a mess tons of washing not been done and no food shopping. DH wet his bed last night so his mattress needed cleaning. So i said to DH this morning you take DD and I will just stay here and sort the house out. He said he didn’t want to go and sit with a bunch of women.

So I said ok you stay here and clean I will go to the party that was also a flat out no. So I said fine you go the party then since you don’t want to help out here.

I gave DD a shower and got her dressed and it was about 10 minutes until the party started. He comes up stairs hanging about telling me that I’m going to be late. He can quite clearly see me in my pyjamas running about cleaning and helping DD get ready.

We went back and fourth for about 20 minutes poor DD in tears and him refusing to take her. He got in a strop and eventually took her.

AIBU?

He’s a cunt and your daughter can see it. You need to put your kids before this dickhead-sorry!

What did he expect to do? Just sit at home?

From this he sounds utterly useless.

DH wet the bed?

Your DH wet his bed? And you have to sort the mattress out??

He wet the bed? I assume he’s a drunk as well as a useless husband and father?

He wet the bed? And didn’t clean it up??

Your DH wet the bed? Why exactly?

I know that's besides the point but you're cleaning up his mess so he shouldn't be stropping about anything. He sounds like a spoilt brat.

Oh my gosh no DS 😂😂

So he basically didn't want to do any parenting?

Sorry but what do you see in someone that lazy who refuses to do the bare minimum?

There is nothing I can do about it! He won’t move out and it’s my house. He refuses to move out so we just live in turmoil everyday.

He sounds fucking awful.

Won't to take one kid to party, won't clean other kids bed instead.

Just wants to laze around and opt out??

Sell the house a d move?

Is this unusual behaviour from your DH?

Are you married? If so I'd be looking at divorce. If not, tell him to move out and change the locks.

Wtf, get rid of him ffs, you absolutely can sort this out op.

Life is too short to be stuck in an unhappy marriage with a bone idle dickhead. Have you seriously considered divorce?

Ime it's a conversation to be had early in with dc..
We agreed dh does any parties from football team.
I do school friends parties...

Or perhaps agree alternate invites..
. But dd shouldn't miss out.
But dh has a point. Parties are mind numbing.

Message him and say you want him out of the house by the time you get home. That's one argument to many your poor kids.

Of course you can do something about it! In the meantime you are exposing your kids to such a toxic atmosphere!

I’ve applied for a divorce we’re currently at conditional offer stage. He won’t move out as he doesn’t want to rent or stay with family. He doesn’t think it’s fair that I get to keep my life the same and he has to start all over again.

Can't you go to court to evict him?

He’s a lazy nasty arsehole. LTB

Sorry - I see you're divorcing him.

If you're married dies he not have some legal stake in the house?

if you’re married is it still just your house?
if yes then surely he can’t just choose to stay.

If he doesn’t want his life to change maybe he shouldn’t be such a lazy bollock.

good luck, sounds like you’ll be losing about 12 stone of dead weight once you’re through this.