AIBU to feel embarrassed after colleague’s comment about payday?

[Malteaser197]

My colleague said ‘’oh my wage slip has come through’’ I said ‘’oh yeah, payday has come round quick I think, thankfully’’ (pay day tomorrow). She said ‘’oh, I never think like that. I don’t even think about it, just stick my wages into an account, save it, spend it if I need too’’ felt embarrassed by this. As I live pay check to pay check, and obviously she was stating that she doesn’t and being paid makes no difference to her.

No need to be embarrassed. Most people live payday to payday. Your colleague is in a hugely privileged position.

Honestly your colleague is the one who should be embarrassed. It’s crass and insensitive for her to say that to others who may be in a different position, and of course you had already been mentioned you had been waiting for payday.

I think an awful lot of people live pay check to pay check and most people know that. Ignore her, she’s being a dick, you’ve nothing to be embarrassed about.
And your colleague may well be in a privileged position or she might also be full of shit.

You really think she wasn’t trying to make op feel small with that utterly pointless comment?

I don't think I know anyone who doesn't know exactly when their wages come through. Your colleague is in a very lucky minority

The only person who should be embarrassed is your colleague - what a twat!

It could be that she has so much money wether she is paid or not doesn't matter but it equally could be that she is the kind of person that doesn't care a out spending money they don't have and lives permanently in their overdraft. Either way that's all about her and nothing about you. Don't let things like this bother you. There will always be people better off than you but there will always be people worse off as well.

No need for you to feel embarrassed, your response is perfectly normal. I’ve had chats at work where the team on all levels of the pay scale, talk openly about “how much longer is it to payday” and so on. I think your colleague is probably talking rubbish/being defensive. People work to be able to pay for food and shelter etc. If we didn’t need the money we wouldn’t work, or else do less hours.

I think you’re taking it wrong.
I always lived like this.
Just spent money on what I had to and when it was gone, I ate porridge.

I found the more I looked at my account the fewer funds I would see and it made me feel shit.
I always paid rent/bills/monthly rail ticket etc as soon as the money came in, then what was left lasted as long as it did.
I was always skint!

Honestly, with the amount of people struggling at the moment I think your colleague is the one who should feel embarrassed. That was a bit crass comment.

This just sounds like average convo between wage slaves. Similar to slagging off the boss even if s/he is a good one. Normal work chat follows some predictable themes (too many hours/not enough pay/short holidays/crap coffee...) . Maybe your colleague is trying to cover her desperation...
Don't take it to heart. It's just chat, like about the weather.

She either lives with her parents or a husband and they pay for everything, or she has an inheritance. But she must be really stupid if she thinks most people don’t need their salary. What on earth have you got to feel embarrassed about? People literally work to earn money to pay their bills each month. She’s the odd one.

She should be embarrassed, not you.

I don't live pay-day to pay-day. But I wouldn't dream of bringing that up with anyone. I don't pretend I do, I just wouldn't comment either way in a conversation as that would be insensitive.

My OH has made comments about finding it cringey when people in his office make comments about pay day (insinuating they’re glad it’s coming around) I think it’s super weird that he thinks it’s cringey! I find it difficult to believe that anyone isn’t hoping payday is around the corner in this current climate. Also, my OH made these comments at a time when he was really strapped for cash and in debt so take what she said with a pinch of salt. I think he once pretended to not even know when pay day was to a colleague - what a weirdo! and I told him as much. I much prefer real interactions with people, I am not desperate for money she haven’t been for a while but if I’m overdrawn and payday comes up in discussion I’m certainly saying something like “That'll sort the overdraft.” What I’m saying is that she may not be being honest, some people are weird.

Edited to add (only applies if your job is low paid) you should say “Why do you do this shitty job if you don’t need the money?” That’s what I wish someone had said to my OH when he was playing his weird I-don’t-know-when-payday-is-but-I-just-Klarna’d-my-lunch games 😂

I agree your colleague should be embarrassed. It was either a very privileged brag or she is bad with money and doesn’t even know what’s in her account.

But I do sympathise with how you feel. I overheard a conversation in a cafe of two women talking about work and finances the other day. One said she thinks maybe she should get a job but doesn’t think she’d have time. The other said make sure your earnings don’t go over £100k but remember to set up a pension for your (nursery age) child. And I was embarrassed that I was only eating in that cafe as a special treat, I must work (for a small fraction of £100k) and I barely have a pension for myself. We just have to remember that we are the normal ones and most people have big bills and do need to think hard about money!

It’s your colleague who should be embarrassed

I think you are misreading it. To me, she’s saying she never looks at her account because she’s generally feckless with money.

I think ur colleague is telling pork pies unless she genuinely is just working her job for the fun of it, she’s just trying to make a statement and to make you think she is something she’s not.

Waiting for Thursday here!

This isn’t necessarily true.

Talk is cheap OP……. You implied that you were thankful that it was payday, just like most people BUT this colleague jumped on that and used it as an opportunity to score points and claimed she really doesn’t spend her pay……FFS….what a load of bollocks!
Take no notice OP…….there’s a multitude of people working paycheque to paycheque.