Stag do plans and suspect abbreviations

[WestlieJ]

DP is joint best man for a close friends Wedding in early summer and the stag is abroad next month. DP sorted the logistics of booking, chasing everyone for payment etc (there is 16 people going). The other best man has put together a ‘plan’ for the long weekend and sent to DP for his approval.

I’ve seen this because it’s saved to iCloud and we can jointly access that through the iPad we share to watch Netflix etc.

It’s all fairly standard stuff, but the final section is titled ‘expected costs’ and lists things such as a beer, meal in restaurant, etc, to help people budget. Within this section there are abbreviations, which I’ve taken to be ‘dodgy’ given they are not written in full and one is fairly obviously a strip club, although no idea on ‘MP’.

Ive got it in front of me as took a photo so have written out exactly:

SC - Ent: €10-20 / PD: €50-70
MP - €50 / HR +€30 / OWO + €40 / PM,SO +€50 / FS €100

I have already asked DP who said he scanned over the main itinerary and didn’t even realise that last section was on there and has no idea what it means. He also said he never has and never will step foot in a strip club.

Am I being naive to think DP was unaware? And does anyone know what the last part means?

We know. It's been clarified a few times now.

Not quite sure about that, but if that’s what you want to believe then crack on.

Yep. Poor op's dp is just misunderstood. He's booked the accommodation only, sex tourism, exploiting and abusing women is all news to him!

Yes it’s blood hideous

a fucking price list circulated before - gross and so disrespectful and mysogenistic (can’t spell today!)

really don’t get why this is part of a weekend away - when you can have sex every day at home!

you are who you hang out with 🤮

of course they’ve discussed it!!! Your being so naive OP

'Gosh'?

What is so nasty and so judgemental to say pot bellied middle aged men do not go to Thailand for the temples?!

This thread is getting a bit 'cancel the cheque' now.

That whole idea is gross

gross group
of men giving home nation a bad reputation abroad - what the fuck is wrong with them

you are really niave OP - of course he could opt out - he wants to go

Omg hideous

trip advisor on exploiting women

😂😂😂

You can bet each and every one of them
is telling that story to their spouses..

”it wasn’t me” 🎵

This!

it’s not ordinary blokes pp
My husband would be horrified

It’s that there is a Menu and he’s still going

a menu 🤮 sleaze city

It's ok Brits abroad couldn't have a much worse reputation and it's Benidorm somewhere famous for a woman who pulls various items out of her vagina. I don't think a stag do going to strip clubs and pos brothels is going to panic the embassy

Not worried about the embassy

just fucking horrified

let’s not all race to the bottom

I think OP that you only know what your DP might engage in without your knowledge, or what he'd turn a blind eye to.

Objectively, it is a bit of a stretch to suggest that the group itinerary contains abbreviations and no one told your DH what they mean. He's been involved in the planning - but of course not the shady parts.... - but he hasn't looked at the itinerary or asked what the abbreviations mean? That's not really believable. The only way he wouldn't have to ask what the abbreviations meant was if there had been a discussion in the group chat. Either way, it's really hard to believe that he didn't know what was being planned.

Also, he tried to put you off the scent originally by suggesting it was a cost of living exercise. Nothing to see here, right?

Whether or not he would partake, only you would know. Or maybe not. Plenty of women are shocked at what their partners get up to when on the piss and away from home with male friends.

Ask him what he was planning on doing when the rest of the group head to a strip club or massage parlour halfway through the night. Go back to the hotel and sit on his own? Sounds unlikely.

I think very best scenario: he knew but was adamant he wouldn't partake. Worst case scenario: he's fully aware and happy to join in, to some degree. Neither is great, tbh.

Final point, you said: "If DP was up to no good he’d have ensured that it wasn’t visible in our shared iCloud." I think it's entirely possible that he'd have forgotten that documents would sync to your Cloud. Especially since he wasn't the one to add it to the group chat. More than one man has gotten caught out over a silly mistake.

I’d be thoroughly disgusted if my DP was so blasé about holidaying with men who create a shopping list for the single men or the ones that go to Thailand (nudge wink 🤮) to get their kicks.

This is apparently the acceptable explanation offered by the OP’s husband.

Men, it’s all about getting their cocks serviced because that’s the most important thing for them.

Edit - NAMALT - but still fail to call it out hey 😣

Do you think we could/should ask MNHQ to add these to the authorised list of MN acronyms? 😂

Trying to imagine an OP - “I asked DH for OWO but he wanted HJ and FS and asked me to dress up and pretend I work in a MP…”

Exactly

Well I for one can't wait for the grooms response - make sure you're around for that call.

The Groom is aware, DP has shown me the messages they’ve exchanged this afternoon. He doesn’t approve but said he’s made clear he won’t be partaking so whatever anyone else wants to get upto is their choice.

He also said that from an ‘ethics’ perspective, the other best man sourced the details from an ex-pat working over there who is strictly independent.

I missed the part about it being in a group chat, so presumably you can see the rest of the chat and see if your DP has been involved in any prior convos re this? Or has your DP made it so you can't see it now?

I'm not sure what the last sentence is supposed to mean? 'Ethics perspective'???!

How does the source of the list address the ethics, it’s just saying he got the list from another sleazy guy. 🤷‍♀️

Need to be very clear, OP. If you don’t have children with this man, I would seriously be reconsidering. My ex husband was exactly as your husband was - right down to horrified by how other men behaved on stage dos. He wouldn’t have even considered strip clubs. It transpired that he was, on every stage so, visiting strip clubs, sleeping with sex workers and harbouring a deep dislike of women who are not there to please him solely. I know you don’t want to believe this but the evidence is there, in black and white. If your husband wouldn’t entertain these things, he would not be entertaining this trip.

'He doesn’t approve but said he’s made clear he won’t be partaking so whatever anyone else wants to get upto is their choice.'

Yeah sure, they'll all be 'partaking'. Obviously.