Stag do plans and suspect abbreviations

[WestlieJ]

DP is joint best man for a close friends Wedding in early summer and the stag is abroad next month. DP sorted the logistics of booking, chasing everyone for payment etc (there is 16 people going). The other best man has put together a ‘plan’ for the long weekend and sent to DP for his approval.

I’ve seen this because it’s saved to iCloud and we can jointly access that through the iPad we share to watch Netflix etc.

It’s all fairly standard stuff, but the final section is titled ‘expected costs’ and lists things such as a beer, meal in restaurant, etc, to help people budget. Within this section there are abbreviations, which I’ve taken to be ‘dodgy’ given they are not written in full and one is fairly obviously a strip club, although no idea on ‘MP’.

Ive got it in front of me as took a photo so have written out exactly:

SC - Ent: €10-20 / PD: €50-70
MP - €50 / HR +€30 / OWO + €40 / PM,SO +€50 / FS €100

I have already asked DP who said he scanned over the main itinerary and didn’t even realise that last section was on there and has no idea what it means. He also said he never has and never will step foot in a strip club.

Am I being naive to think DP was unaware? And does anyone know what the last part means?

'My DH went on a stag do - all his mates went into a strip club and he waited outside'

🤣🤣

Super naive to think this absolves him - the amount of threads on here in recent times about cheating that has been discovered or proved by cloud/shared services purely because the silly men covered all tracks apart from that one is crazy. The thread I mentioned from last year where the OP was watching her husband cheat on her in real time on a stag do in Benidorm was similarly due to a cloud service beaming his little adventure back to the family tablet ipad IIRC. Your DP defo won't make this icloud mistake again OP, and nor will any of his mates!

Just because there's a menu, doesn't mean he's going to order off it

But the thing thats dodgy here is "the groom wont be impressed"
Well isnt the point that a stag do is for the groom?
Surely he wont want these shenanigans taking place on his stag do....so he needs to step in and change the plans....its his stag do!!!
Any decent man would be appalled at this and not go. End of.
Standing outside a strip club?! Is that the moral highground then?!
Some peoples standards when it comes to men are so low, no wonder the manosphere is on the increase

Definitely do this!

Make it clear you’re horrified and approach it in a way that assumes he is horrified too, as a good
man should be.

He needs the STI check up before she goes anywhere near.

He’ll be all over you on return OP. Saying he’s missed it etc when he’s actually getting off on what he’s done/doing. Be ready for it because you’ll have the clap before you know it.

His stories will be “yeah it was alright, didn’t really get on with half the lads. Not my style, immature, crude etc”. And then that he “doesn’t actually know what went on and it was mostly drinking and sun. Although he did lose them one night, go back early, couldn’t really say” etc.

Bull. Shit.

Sex tourism hasn't gone up nearly as much as food or gas.

Massage parlour. Are they off to Amsterdam by any chance

I knew she’d have a bloke who confirmed it for him 🤣 mate, your brother was just having your husbands back ffs. He did not stand outside like a fucking wet dishcloth

Owo is oral without ie: without a condom

Where was his shock and horror? If he doesn't then decline to go on the stag himself then it would be over for me.
My husband did exactly that declined to go on a stag do to Amsterdam and actually stopped being friends with his childhood group of friends because he had zero in common with them happily buying access to women.

This made me 🤣🤣🤣 too!

And even if the poster’s DH didn't go in on that occasion, and the poster knows it’s true because her brother was there and told her, I’m pretty confident that if the poster’s brother hadn’t been there, her DH would have quite happily gone in!

ikr....its laughable....how long was he out there 😂😂😂

A little line of principled men waiting outside for their mates 🤣🤣🤣 funny how you literally never see this in the strip clubs of Benidorm but everybody’s Nigel has done it

pmsl.

I mean make it plausible, 'some blokes went to a strip club but it looked rough so me and 3 others went to a bar and played pool. Still very yeah right but not waited outside .

I don’t know why you are getting such a hard time. My husband has friends that are grim and go of for sleazy trips to Bangkok, if he was going on a stag do to Benidorm I know that these friends would have a similar list. That doesn’t mean I’d have the right to ban him from going, on the stag do and I wouldn’t actually want that right, I’m happy believing that yes he’s friends would be up to all sorts of sleazy crap, but I know my husband wouldn’t join in, you sound like you believe the same of your husband, that’s not a bad thing.

I would be very surprised if your husband was unaware of the intentions of some/many to have sex/take part in sexual type entertainment

You, however, are choosing to believe him and that's your choice

I wonder how you'll find out, after the stag do, if your husband went back to the hotel whilst all/many of the others went to have a jolly time

He'll obviously say he went to the hotel.

He doesn't want to let the groom down .... how incredibly noble of him.

But he is fine with going on a trip (which HE has organised) knowing that members of the group will be endorsing and contributing to the degradation and exploitation of vulnerable women.

What a prince among men .... not my idea of a life partner.

Why is your husband friends with men like that? Did no one teach him that when you see something immoral happening, you speak up and you cut those people off? How odd.

This behaviour only continues because men continue to accept it within their social circles. These friends of your husbands are rapists, these men think they can purchase consent, they’ll happily use trafficked vulnerable women. And your husband actually calls them friends? And spends his time willingly with these men? How grim. I’m glad I picked a better partner.

My genuine apologies for ruining your day.

If the groom and your DH respect women and respect their own bodies then they have been let down by the other best man. If they genuinely don’t like/want that kind of behaviour, the groom can cancel the stag and opt for a golf weekend or something. Alternatively the groom should understand and respect why your DH declines to go. Your DH is prioritising this trip over your comfort and his own self respect. That would be a reason to leave in my book.

OP, you’re a fool. He’s as involved as all on that trip. If he wasn’t, he’d have cancelled already.

Oh dear. Birds of a feather flock together. Some of them just have chicks that are more gullible than others

It’s not about your “right to ban” him. It’s about your right to walk away from a relationship where one partner shows behaviour that suggests he has no respect for women. You also have the right to stay of course but I couldn’t. A man who is happy to see women degraded is a man who is happy to degrade women and I couldn’t be complicit in degrading myself by accepting this.

Weaponised incompetence strikes again. My ex DH* couldn't figure out how to order a Tesco click and collect (apparently) but he knew how to find what he wanted online from exploited women.

*DH here stands for dickhead

You can guarantee this particular specimen of male achievement won't even know what the terms dates are for his kids' schools, despite them being blue tacked to the fridge.