Things I haven't said out loud this week

[Nam3ChangeAgain]

I will go first!
You are literally the only person that thinks you are amazing! I had to suffer you for years until I wised up! Even your own kids are starting to see you are a dick. You think giving them money makes you a good dad? Try actually spending time with them and getting to know them you you lazy prick!

Next week if you are late again without good reason to our lunch we have had a table booked for, you can consider this to be the last time we meet up.
If you can make your medical appointments etc on time, then you can make it to the lunch less than 10 minutes from your home on time. I’ve tried talking to you about your lack of effort and it’s got worse not better. You wonder why so many friends have dropped you.

I gifted you money for your birthday that you asked for to make yourself something nice at the workshop. I find out weeks later you used the money to make something for your mum instead…. That is fucking weird, did I just buy your mum a Mother’s Day present? Is every word out of your mouth a lie? I’m also sure that you haven’t got a weekend away for £120 in July ARGH

Use some bloody headphones

If I mattered I think you would have remembered.

Sorry I'm late to your meeting. I don't really have an excuse to be honest, I was just dicking about on my phone.

No, it isn't a lovely dress. It's hideous. You have terrible taste in clothing and you are four sizes bigger than me so stop giving me your bloody cast-offs!

This is a pre-emptive strike.....brother(who I do love to bits) coming for the weekend.

"No, I am happy with a coffee. No thank you, I don't want scones, or cake, or chocolate biscuits, and neither do you, seeing as you ate a massive breakfast/lunch only an hour ago and you've already had 2 heart attacks. Actually, giving the luxury hot chocolate with whipped cream a miss might be an idea, too."

Fuck off with your fake congratulations, stick your congratulations up your fucking arse you bunch of cunts.

My gp and husband are fat phobic ableist cunts, who decided to point out 'helpfully' that if I lost weight it might cure my fibro, and my autism?!?!, nooo, at 12 stone and 5ft6,i was overweight yes, but my joints hurt because my nerves are on fire due to the autoimmune problem, but thanks for setting off a latent eating disorder that saw me lose 5 + stones and funnily enough my joints still hurt, and now I'm dangerously underweight. Thanks!

To my male guitarist friend, If you keep messaging me, dropping hints about a meet up for a song run through and are gushing when we meet with no follow up, you can piss off.
You needn’t be frightened, I don’t want a sexual relationship with you, just friends as we get on like a house on fire.