Watch this argument with me

[Motherflubber]

I’m eating alone in a very small restaurant in a very small town and there’s a very small woman absolutely laying in to her dining partner who is resolutely refusing to react.

She’s in her mid-60’s I’d say. Her dining partner looks a similar age, he’s probably late 60’s although looks younger because he’s got that lanky teenage frame and posture about him. He’s deathly calm in the face of her fury.

Anyway, she’s fuming. It started about 20 minutes ago with a furiously whispered ‘well it’s just like it was in millets PHILLIP’. The ‘Phillip’ was spat with such venom I winced from across the room. There’s only them, me and another table here.

From what I can gather, Phillip has a long held opinion on something and as a result, doesn’t want to buy something that this lady would like to purchase. She says she will buy it for herself and Phillip has calmly said ‘that’s fine if you want to, I don’t mind you having one but I won’t be using it’. He’s eating a burger and switched from eating with a knife and fork to picking the whole thing up in his hands - this infuriated the woman further and she said that sort of behaviour was exactly why she can’t have him coming to Mark and Fiona’s next week. He didn’t reply to that and that also seems to have annoyed this woman even more. She has finished her main course but keeps picking up her cutlery and putting it down again like she’s stuck for something to do.

Phillip has attempted to change the subject a few times but she can’t let this go. They’ve not said what the thing is but my first thought was an electric car maybe? She wants one but he doesn’t? Whatever it is has clearly been boiling her piss for a while because she’s absolutely hopping mad that he won’t agree to use one of whatever it is. I’m also dying to know what happened in Millets.

Also yes I’m eavesdropping, although given the space is tiny and they’re feet away from me, I’d hear what was happening whether I was trying to hear it or not. It is indeed none of my business and if you need to tell me off to feel morally superior then please do go ahead. If you’re a people watcher though, come and speculate with me

He wants a swarm of alpacas, she'd prefer a cat. or a gerbil.

Soz - have I lost my mind/thread? OP asked what they were arguing about.

Nosiness....human nature

‘it’s not a hobby Judith, we don’t have to do it together’
🤣

It’s an e-bike and Phillip doesn’t think he needs one just because she can’t keep up with him without a motor. (Despite his knees)

im a fan, must listen to more random conversations I’m not in!

If you read the OP’s updates you would know that she has revealed what the item they are arguing about is.

I think the hobby is a "Pub Quiz" we have a team member in ours so when we are discussing possible answers in heated whispers talks out loud with his contribution so the teams on the next tables hear!
Very infuriating! And now everyone tells him to "shush" he takes umbridge and doesn't want to join in, he says he doesn't need a hearing aid 🙄
His wife says different.

They're having a loud conversation in public. Fair game.

I want to know what a 60ish year old couple were doing in Millets in the first place. With Philip 's knees they are hardly likely to be going camping . Or maybe they are going to a festival this summer , it's going to be wasted on him as he won't be able to hear it anyway .

I am Team Judith here as Philip sounds like a smug git and probably very very annoying. And his non hobby may be a spiritual awakening and he is practicing his Zen .
I hate Philip.

Tears streaming and proper belly laughs to this this morning! 🤣

I imagine he doesn’t want to be able to hear her wittering

Team Philip! I suspect he would benefit greatly from either divorce or being completely deaf 😆

Apologies for not updating sooner - my phone ran out of battery not long after I posted and I spent the rest of my meal doing absolutely nothing but eat and enjoy a wine, must remember to unplug more often because it was glorious.

Judith did come back and sit back down.

Judith: ’Shall we have a pudding?’
Phillip: ‘yes if you’d like one’
Judith: ’well are you having one?’
Phillip: ’I wasn’t planning to, no’
Judith: ’well I won’t have one either then’ (annoyed)
Phillip: ’just have the bloody desert JUDITH’.
Silence.
Judith: ’well I don’t want to sit here eating if you’re not. Shall we share one? Let’s share one’
Phillip: ’yes alright, what would you like?’
Judith: ’I don’t know, you choose’

Phillip, to his credit, ordered a sticky toffee pudding without another word and even chose custard (the correct choice) without asking Judith first. Judith had about 3 bites before declaring she was stuffed and Phillip finished it off.

Phillip asked for the bill. There was a bit of back and forth about how Phillip needs a new wallet as he struggled to get his card out of the card slot but he said it was his fingers that were the problem, not the wallet. Judith pursed her lips so hard they went white.

They left not long after that, Phillip and his bad knees helped Judith with her coat (both in matching heavy duty anoraks, a practical but possibly over precautious choice for a mild evening in March) and they detoured via the bar and thanked the bar staff for a lovely meal on their way out. I saw Judith chivvy Phillip towards the door with a little hand gesture when he started to go into detail about why he particularly enjoyed his beer. I think the detail might have been lost on the man behind the bar in any case even if he’d managed to expand the topic.

Alas, we might never know what happened in Millets but I’m glad Judith got her pudding.

Thank you for the update....it was an interesting people watching session!!

Well I've just been on a ten minute rollercoaster. I initially agreed with OP's assessment of Phillip being infuriatingly dismissive as the source of Judith's anger but after the pudding incident have concluded that Judith is unbearably codependent and probably feels angry much of the time because, by some miracle, Phillip hasn't caught it.

I think OP is writing for comedy effect as these two's conversation has tickled her.....and is giving us all good entertainment

I can’t speak for anyone else’s reasons, but for me personally I love watching normality. I’m dining alone because of a stacking series of heartaches and watching two people who clearly love each other have a full blown argument, both feeling safe to express their annoyance not only to each other but in public, fully confident they’ll wake up together in the morning and all will be fine. I like that this kind of steadiness exists even if not in my life right now. I find it fascinating and comforting.

Aahhhh! Milletts! Isn’t that a store that sells walking gear, boots, etc?? Maybe they went there to buy coats and accidentally purchased identical ones? 🤔🤷‍♀️😁

Thank you @Motherflubber .Just what I needed to get my spirits up this morning. Instead of fretting to get my 16 year old autistic son out of the loo so he won't be late. Why does he have to poo just before it's time to go every bloody single time. I asked him 20 min earlier and no, didn't need to go. Ahhrg.
I think they were both endearing tbh. He should get hearing aids but then we might not get the follow up next time you see (hear) them. Because you need to get to the bottom of the Millets mystery !

Absolutely fascinating.

I presume that Milletsgate was a his and hers anoraks,

Jusith stuck her tongue out at him and blew a raspberry. There is now awkward silence.

Maybe it’s Judith who shouldn’t be going to Mark and Fiona’s next week !!

The plot thickens slightly here - the millets in our local town closed quite a few years ago so either they’ve been shopping recently in a foreign Millets or this is a longstanding example of something Judith brings up often?

Oh my! That is class! In other words "you never fucking listen" 😁

I keep imagining Mark is their son and Fiona is the DIL Judith is desperate not to be shown up in front of

A brilliant and entertaining vignette. Well done and thank you OP

Thank you motherflubber 💐 I was in such a grump since being woken at 4am by the kitten who had had a Bad Tray, and this has cheered me (and DH) right up. 😄 You are a tonic!
Can we send you out again?