Not wanting to share a toilet with men at work

[Babylambchop]

I have started at a new workplace and its toilets are non-compliant with the law. Ordinary toilets - 3 normal cubicles, not floor to ceiling, with shared hand washing- turned into mixed sex. So all toilets are just 'toilets'. I have tried to get on with it, despite absolutely hating the idea, but last week the seats were all up with pubes stuck everywhere and piss all over the floor, so couldn't even really get to the loo without trousers going in it. Plus kept bumping into male colleagues where we were all a bit awkward. I hate it and I can't get over the fact they're illegal and I shouldn't have to put up with it. Dreading my really heavy period next week. Wibu to complain? In all honesty I dont think I can, but ffs!!!

Yes that’s a version of the ‘inclusive’ design that is not regulated. It’s what transactivist designers like but they haven’t safety tested them.

Shared washbasin area is pretty grim as well. I’m a woman but I don’t want to see women rinsing out menstrual cups etc.

Bodily fluids should be private for hygiene and dignity

I've experienced sexual harassment - almost assault - at work. I've experienced panic attacks at work. My colleague begun her mid term miscarriage at work. A different colleague unfairly was humiliated by her boss at work.

In all these instances we first headed to the toilets as a place to be away from duties in a safe enclosed area where we would only encounter other women.

But ..... Doesn't everyone know why single sex toilets are needed already? I cannot believe this knowledge is somehow lost.

As a side point, why can’t men piss in the toilet without getting it everywhere?!

The simple solution is to make the toilets single-occupancy, i.e., lock them as soon as you enter, then they can be mixed. Or just designated men's and women's, and someone has to do a long walk.

I am a woman but I agree - I'd hate to see that!

Astonishes me that men put up with the disgusting state that other men seem to leave loos in tbh.

I worked in an office about 15 years ago where the loo wash shared. I didn't like it as it was amongst three different companies on different floors so you didn't know many of the people using it. It was shockingly dirty sometimes with food sandwich wrappers in the bin!!!

Was not "washed".

I hate using toilets after men have been in there… Even in my own house! Yanbu

Well mine can, I’ve been married to him 35 years and never seen a drop of piss somewhere it shouldn’t be. And if he did miss he’d clean up after himself.

As a new employee I would not raise it - wait and speak to a few other women first.

It is quite unbelievable the state that we are in because Standards weren’t followed.

If you look back at British Standards when the Health and Safety at work legislation was put into place in 1992, it would be unconceivable that single sex designs were used for both sexes. That is why we have safer single sex designs for main provision - typically cubicles (with gaps above and below the doors and partitions) leading on to a single sex washroom (with the sinks). Any mixed toilet in legislation has to be completely private in a separate room - which isn’t so good for health and safety.

As people head to toilets when they feel ill, a disproportionate amount of people collapse in them. That’s why in regulations, toilet doors should be able to be opened up from the outside outwards (as a body pushed up against it prevents rescuers from retrieving the person).

We have this crazy situation where regulations discuss that people collapse in toilets so toilets should be able to be unlocked, but not that you should have a method to know it’s an emergency. The worse case recently was a poor man who was left for 6 days in council offices toilets where people were coming and going. Everyone thought the toilet was just out of order.

The new big problem is hidden cameras. When you have lots of items in the space that has the toilet in, like grills for mechanical ventilation, sink plumbing, individual fire alarms etc it becomes easier to hide a camera. And men have all the time in the world to set it up when it’s private and they are allowed in. There have been no women convicted of voyeurism in toilets. Plenty of men of lots of professions. In my research, I am into double figures for adult men in schools with hidden cameras in children and staff toilets. Doctors seem to like hidden cameras too. And a Scottish SMP, apparently.

Bonus bingo points for 'women's toilets are worse than men's' - it's an absolute joke. Men's toilets are disgusting. Mixed sex ones have piss, skids, pubes, seats up and signs telling the men that they need to close the door.

Here's the High Court judgment - my favourite paragraphs are 25 - 27

www.judiciary.uk/wp-content/uploads/2026/02/good-law-project-EHRC-AC-2025-1953-judgment-13Feb26.pdf

Please come to my local library. Used tampons are wedged into the crack between the wall and ceiling and not removed. They are not removed. At first I thought it was some bizarre art installation (but not). I haven't visited the men's so cannot compare

I just want to thank you again, for all your hard work in this area, you are an inspiration in calmly and clearly laying out the facts, again and again and AGAIN when it comes to discussing why single sex toilets with gaps are the safest and best solution for all.

Every thread this comes up, you arrive and give me new nuggets of information which just confirms to me how important it is for single sex toilets. For women's safety, privacy and dignity. For men's privacy and dignity. I always save your posts to help clarify in my head whenever I see people trying to argue against it and I've used your stats and details in real life when talking to others.

Also, to the @Babylambchop OP, I hope you see @Keeptoiletssafe posts on this thread and on her other threads and use all the resources she's collected and come up with a document and a plan to give to your workplace. You should not put up with this, it's awful. Never mind illegal!

Sending that email as a new employee will mark the new employee as 'that' employee and likely ensure in a roundabout way that her job does not continue beyond probation (for other reasons of course...). Up to OP whether she chooses to do the 'right thing' more than continuing with her job

That’s pretty much what I thought.

They can. All they need to do is sit. Stand at a urinal, sit to piss in a toilet. It’s laziness and an inability to think creatively.

Who are these disgusting men who pee everywhere? Like I said upthread, we have a single floor to ceiling door with the washing facilities then a second floor to ceiling in there for the toilet. Unisex as only person can be in there at a time. We have this set up on each floor.

In over 30 years I have only ever known one man make a mess. The men that use our toilet are civilised, and in fact I have never lived with one of these filthy men. How odd.

Why are you sharing a misleading and legally incorrect article rather than the actual regulations which are very clear?

Why does seeing a male colleague in a toilet make you feel so awkward?

OP (and every other woman) doesn’t have to justify herself for wanting the single sex facilities stipulated by the law.

I think it’s a bit odd when people claim they are NOT uncomfortable sharing such facilities with the opposite sex - it demonstrates a lack of boundaries around privacy.

Maybe you move in very special circles.

I went to an upmarket hotel with mixed sex toilets and they were disgusting - men’s urine in the floor has a distinct odour.

Thank you @INeedAPensieve that’s very kind of you to post.