How long is acceptable to be off work

[shortsout]

After losing a grandparent?

If I lost my child there’s no way I’d be back at work in 5 days!

I took a week off after my nan died. I just couldn't function. I don't know if I I was paid or not, I was very lucky not to have to care. I think you should be able to take the time you need, no matter what the connection xx

This.

I would expect they are checking he's ok and if he's likely to need more time off (funeral)

I'm sorry for your loss.

Sounds like a regular check in following an absence. Box ticking. Try not to worry xxx

No, you're just advocating near endless time off which is unsustainable in the workplace.

Edited for spelling.

A week. I’ve never taken more than a few days though, I wish I’d taken longer

I wasn’t allowed even one day off for my grandmothers funeral. My boss at the time had an important golf day planned, and one of us had to be there.

If you need half a year off after a grandparent dies, do the decent thing and resign. Don’t stay home being paid while your colleagues pick up the slack. That’s just ridiculous, selfish and unsustainable, that’s why.

I worked in the NHS too. The amount of pisstake for absence was unbelievable. Really difficult to sack people. Decided to leave because couldn't put up with people's bullshit any longer.

I think it would be a pretty heartless employer to punish someone for taking a few days off to grieve. Grief affects different people in different ways. I wouldn't have thought a couple of days is in any way excessive. As someone said above, hopefully it will just be a back to work interview or just to touch base and see how he is. I think even the most basic policy allows 3 days paid/unpaid for a bereavement.

I got 1.5 days off when my gran died. Half a day when I went home after finding out she had died and then a day for the funeral

My wife works in a hospital for NHS Scotland, and the absenteeism is farcical. You just about need to murder someone to get sacked.

I remember when my dad died and I said at work that the funeral is on X date and they said 'You need to fill in a special leave request form.' My response was 'I'm not asking for permission.' I'm usually very respectful of rules, I don't take time off as a general rule, quite the opposite I drag myself in even if I feel rough because I don't want to let anyone down. However, the thought of asking permission on that occasion really made me cross! Sometimes employers act like they own you.

This 👆

Entirely depends on your employers policy. Mine covers spouses, siblings, parents, grandparents and in laws

edited to add it’s also completely at managers discretion for anybody after this, so if you are particularly close with an aunt for example they will approve

Eh? What you on about? Nobody's talking about the death of a child... Why are you overdramatising this thread?

It shows a complete lack of understanding of how the loss of a loved one can affect you, would you like someone with cancer to resign?

Let’s hope you never become ill and need a few months off work to recover. If you do let’s hope you have the decency to resign!

I agree. I adored my GPs, but had no time off at all when my GF died (his funeral was on a Saturday). Of course the loss of a loved relative is sad, but when they are elderly it has to be accepted and prepared for, it shouldn't plunge people into overwhelming grief. I'm not in the UK btw and would have been entitled to three days bereavement leave, I just didn't feel I needed to take it.

It is a bereavement. Sadly, a lot of work places are strict about such things.
I was not even allowed to attend my grandad's funeral.

I took emergency holiday to attend my grandparents funerals. In both instances my employer only gave compassionate leave for immediate family: mum, dad, sibling.

And that is why there is such stigma attached to mental health with attitudes like that

Not a grandparent, but I know a lady who became very ill after her mum died... she ended up sectioned. That was about 15 years ago, and she is still not classed as fit for work.

Some people are deeply affected by grief, and that should not be dismissed.

I lost my mum very suddenly when I was 27. I had 4 weeks compassionate leave so I do understand. The loss of a grandparent is not usually such a shock and to take 6 months off is ridiculous. I have had colleagues go off sick ( stress related) for 6 months, come back when the paid leave is expiring, work the statutory minimum to qualify and then go off sick again. All paid for by the tax payer. It’s not sustainable.

15 years out of work for bereavement. Would she have stayed out of work for so long if there wasn’t a social security system to fund that I wonder?

She is not on benefits. Is living off her inheritance. But she has still has assessments etc to get her pension stamp.

I am not entirely sure how it all works