How long is acceptable to be off work

[shortsout]

After losing a grandparent?

Just the day of the funeral unless you are having a breakdown. Losing a GP is sad but life - and work - goes on.

Err, surely this would depend on the needs of the individual?
People respond differently so no one on here can answer this.
If you need time off then speak with your GP
I am sorry for your loss and hope you are able to take the time you need and grieve

If you have to travel, a few days plus funeral I think.

If grandparent lived nearby, a couple of days here and there to help.

DH’s work would give 5 if needed but are more of an employee focused employer with good benefits as he gets 4 months paid paternity. He took the day off for his uncles funeral last month and they offered him the day after off too.

Mine offer the day of the funeral only.

Do you mean paid time off, or just time off? You can self certify sickness for a week so that’s fine. I’d get a day off for the funeral but nothing else “compassionate” in my work. It’s normally clearly laid out in policies.

5 days compassionate leave at my place, but also have up to 6 months paid sick leave a year when you’ve worked there for 4 years (British bank). I’ve seen colleagues take anywhere from the 5 days to a few months for a grandparent. I’ve never lost anyone and I’m dreading it!

I managed some fairly large teams over the years & you know how to play it if you are on the ball & know your staff. Some people only want/need a few days off.
Others I knew had been brought up by their grandparents so cut them slack and gave them compassionate leave based on stress.
The standard days off for a death just don't cut it for everyone, I never had any pushback from our HR when I presented the case clearly.
Yes I'm sure there are some who would try to milk it, but that is down to any manager knowing their team. Something I think that is sadly missing these days.

I personally only had one grandparent left when I became an adult and I went back to work the next day. I had the funeral off. I think I would expect that from most people unless their grandparent played a parenting role, or there was no one else in the family to do all the death admin. Reading this thread I see people do differently though.

I lost my mum in my 20s and I had a day off for the funeral and the day after.
Wallowing doesn't really help me !

A day for the funeral would be reasonable. But a lot of employers would ask you to use holiday leave.

You can only be on a zero hours contract for four years. After that you're deemed to be permanent. Your DH should contact ACAS. They're very helpful.

Op what your dh took sounds reasonable to me and a number of my old jobs would have been fine with it. Unfortunately there are always the robots that believe life slots back into place the day after someone dies and doesn’t realise the person may be upset, might live away from the family area and or might need to help other family members out x

We are entitled to time off for the funeral of anyone who is not parent or child.

Each of my grandparents died in the morning of a work day. I left immediately each time so that's one day off then one day for the funeral.

No annual leave required

DS’s last job, he wasn’t even guaranteed time off for the funeral.

Wow that’s harsh! Did you know her relationship with her grandparents or her upbringing, what her grandparent contributed! Be kind

Day / pm for the funeral

I was given 5 days + day of funeral but that was because I was next of kin and extremely emotionally close to my grandparent (all their children already dead) and I was the one making all the arrangements, there in her last days and dealing with her affairs when she lived at a distance.

If it had been a circumstance where I had a parent or somebody else dealing with everything I would have perhaps expected one day for any potential bedside visit pre-death if a sudden call to attend and one for the funeral.

If the meeting is total crap since he’s worked those house consistently for so long, with those hours - he needs to ask for advice about whether he’s really an ‘employee’ - perhaps ACAS? And I think he’s a bit better protected having been there over 2 years.

I'm really glad that in my jobs my managers have always just used their discretion and not given two hoots about the official policy. . I would have been expected in to work the day after my best friends husband hung himself, despite having stayed up all night with her waiting for the funeral director to remove him, help her with the kids etc,.as well as my own grief. Thankfully I called my manager in the morning and he just said, see you next week, let me know how you're getting on.

I've had great mangers and I'm so grateful as they've really influenced how I manage people.

You're confusing two issues here. You are quite right that mental health services are terrible. Nobody can argue with that.

But, it's equally not appropriate to expect a company to support an employee for that amount of time. It simply isn't sustainable for most businesses, particularly SMEs.

The answer to mental health problems is not for the sufferer to live a life of being on sick leave.

Interesting item on Radio 4 this am. Over 11million “ fit notes “ issued last year. An increase of 800000 over last 6 years. GP who was interviewed said it is v hard for GPs to say no, this often results in complaints and breakdown of patient doctor relationship. Notes can be issued digitally without the patient even being seen. Mental health and stress main listed reason. Often due to conflict in the workplace. Again, how sustainable and how appropriate a way of addressing in work issues is this?
www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c20lew24kngo

If you've a crap employer with ridiculous rules it might be the only way to address issues.

As for GPs issuing fitnotes without seeing patients, that's a GP problem.

Maybe it's time employers thought more about the consequences of their company model if it's causing employees to take drastic action and go off sick.

I wouldn't expect any more than the day of the funeral TBH.

Is he going to he requesting further time off for the funeral? Maybe that’s what they want to discuss?

It would also be good practice to have a return to work check in, if handled compassionately.

Unless the one making funeral arrangements, for a grandparent, a day for the funeral would be the norm. I don’t personally think that’s great if you were very close.

I was responding to a previous poster. Please try to be polite.