How long is acceptable to be off work

[shortsout]

After losing a grandparent?

Unless he is the only person to be able to organise all the paperwork following a death, the Monday was unnecessary.
Usually GP is day of funeral only but most companies will agree to an additional day unpaid.

I had the day as needed to travel back to family then day of the funeral with my only GP left whilst I was working age
Everyone is different though

This, the Friday most companies would understand but taking the Monday seems like he wanted a long weekend.

When I worked at a place which had a policy, it was compassionate leave (don’t know how much as it never happened) for spouse, parent, child and sibling only.

I had to take annual leave for my grandparent’s funeral…. and my infant niece’s.

I imsgine in those circumstances most people would get signed off sick .

I wasn’t entitled to any compassionate leave when my grandparents died, I had to take annual leave for the funeral. If I had been unable to work because I was upset it would have had to be sick leave.
If you’re asking how much time is acceptable, that would really depend how close you were and if the death was expected. I was upset when my grandad died because although he was in his 80s he was well and living at home until he died and it was unexpected, also I was quite young so had a a couple of days off uni I think. Didn’t feel like I needed any time off for my other grandparents because they were older and had been unwell.

I recently lost a grandparent and so did my husband. Fell over Christmas so no days off but I was given CL for both funerals (3 days). My husband was given 2 days for his GP and used annual leave for my GP's funeral.

Maybe a day or two and then a day for the funeral, unless your work offers more

I had to take an AL day for my mother’s funeral!! She died on a Sunday, 3 days bereavement (M/T/W) funeral was on Thursday!

One day to attend the funeral.

Unless there are circumstances such as they brought you up instead of your parents.

They’d be a bit arseholish to sack someone for 2 days off, but that doesn’t mean they won’t. How long has he worked there?

My work policy is up to 3 days paid (5 days if they brought you up and you view them as you would a parent) including funeral attendance. Line managers have discretion to approve additional paid special leave if required and appropriate. This would be a maximum of 5 additional days.
Pretty decent company.

I had none. Just time off for the funeral.

None.

There is no statutory right to paid bereavement leave for a grandparent in the UK, but employers typically allow 1 to 5 days of compassionate or bereavement leave, often at their discretion.

Many employers these days, will not allow a single hour off, not even for the funeral, and you will be expected to use annual leave.

Sounds like your DH works at such a place. I hope everything is OK for him @shortsout and I am sorry to hear of the death.

Some people where I work would be given six months compassionate leave for this. I would be lucky to get a day off for the funeral, and that would have to be annual leave.

It very much depends on the situation. I've only taken time off for grandparents so I can travel and attend their funerals. It was very sad each time but they were all elderly, and died from long term conditions, and my parents, aunts and uncles are all very capable normal adults who were able to make arrangements and be present. My employer's very flexible and supportive so if I needed to leave early to help my mum with logistics and arrangements, that was fine. I work from home so when I've found out in the work day in this job I've been able to take a break, go for a walk and get in a better headspace, and my colleagues have been really supportive of me taking the time I need.

When I worked in a place I had to be at in person, I received a call from my best friend's sibling to say she had died (we were in our 30s) and my boss there immediately sent me home and said to take the next day off. Not a relative, but such a shock that she said I needed to look after myself and they could manage without me. I think my inability to talk without crying probably didn't help in my customer facing role! I mention that as an empathetic employer can and should be flexible.

I know people who have been raised by their grandparents who I'd expect to be treated in the same way as someone who loses a parent. I have a friend whose mum and aunt are useless at being grown ups and she was the one who had to do all of the post-death logistics with care, hospitals, funeral director etc and she also needed more time off than many people would need.

The meeting could be about anything though surely?!

This would be perfectly acceptable at my work.

A grandparent is considered a "direct relative" and the starting point is 3 days, where 1 is the funeral.

However, it is also line managers discretion so we would be expected to have that conversation, not just not go in. Discretion also can mean more time.

When my Grandma died, I had a day where I did the mad dash across country to her bedside on a Friday. Then she died in the night Sunday night. I did an hour or so handover that day, then had Tuesday off and worked a couple of hours each day for the rest of the week. She was in rented accommodation and we only had a week to clear her flat so we had a lot to sort quite quickly. My boss was clear that he didnt expect me to work that week at all but the balance suited me. I then had a day off for the funeral a few weeks later.

In comparison, when my other Grandma died during covid I took the rest of the day after I got the call and then half a day for the funeral as it was remote. I worked in the morning more as a distraction than anything. This death was more expected though so I'd done some "pre grieving" of sorts.

Sorry for your husband's loss and I hope his work are compassionate.

I had a few days off when my nan suddenly died, she lived two hours away from us so we needed to go and sort things out, then did the funeral.
My other nan on my mother's side had dementia for years and it was almost a relief when she went, just one special leave day for her funeral.

I think got a day off for the funeral.

My Grandad was 94 when he died, I didn’t feel I needed a day off work as I knew he’d had a good life.

Funeral only unfortunately

My last full-time employer, where I worked for 18 years, allowed three days compassionate leave for the death of a parent, to include the day of the funeral, none for a grandparent, time off would be unpaid unless booked as holiday.

a couple of days at most

The principal though @Sweetcorn100 s that although it was only 2 days actually off work it spanned the weekend and in effect the OPs DH needed 4 days to come to terms with it as he also took the Monday off.

Whether that was reasonable or not, it depends on how close the DH was to his Grandfather and any other circumstances which there may have been that he also needed the Monday as well. That, we don't know, from the OPs posts.

When I worked in local government and a university it was upto a week with pay for an immediate relative -parent/child or sibling. Grandparents etc were not considered "immediate" (unless they had brought you up/were closest kin) so it was usually unpaid leave at the discretion of the manager. I got a week of paid when my father died.

5 days?!! 5 Days?! That's incredibly generous, where on earth do you work?!