How long is acceptable to be off work

[shortsout]

After losing a grandparent?

One place I worked I had to take it off as annual leave.

Another place I had the day after off (parents were flying back from abroad so needed to be around to talk to them) and the day of the funeral.

Both NHS.

It all depends on the employer. When my Nan was dying, my company were amazing but what I was given was rare. Also my relationship was more like mother-daughter rather than a grandparent I saw occasionally. I had 3 weeks to care for her at home under hospice at home, one weeks compassionate and I had a weeks holiday booked on top. So it was about 5 weeks all in I was off. Had the day before her funeral, day of and a day off after.

I just had a day for the funeral. Why did he take the Monday off too? I can understand if the grandparent was like a parent and raised him? I was very very close to my grandparents but they didn’t raise me and so one day off for the funeral felt an acceptable amount of time off

Quite frankly no one knows here. What does his contract say? How badly has he been affected. I would say a death warrants as much time as necessary . How it is classified, compassionate leave:sick leave will depend on many factors.

it really annoys me when people are derisory about other people’s response to death. Everyone will have a different response. Often it can be a trigger for a lot more!! I could flip it round and say if someone felt they only needed an afternoon off or the day of the funeral they obviously are quite a cold person- but that would be unfair, it’s just their response, it doesn’t matter of it wouldn’t be mine

At my place you would possibly get a days compassionats leave if you claimed a very close connection with them plus a day for the funeral..No more.

You said he is on a zero hour contract, so I'd assume it would be unpaid leave. Has he checked his contract or any work policy handbook? I assume he is also planning a 3rd day off for the actual funeral?

My nan lived abroad, long haul and different time zone. I watched the live stream in the middle of the night UK time and was given 1/2 day off- essentially to get some sleep before work.

What other people were/weren't given in their own companies is really irrelevant to your DH's situation

NHS was 3 days for a parent etc, 1 day for GP (day of funeral) may have changed now…but that was 12 years ago.

For the funeral but have to taken as leave. NHS. Other trusts might be different. You can guess why I know that although it wasn't me but a colleague who is now looking for another job. This was recently too

I had 1 day for my father and two days for my mum, but that included arranging the funeral, transport, and catering.

No grand parents

Yes, this is my experience. I don't think it's unreasonable tbh.

Loads of employers do a return to work interview after absences. That's very standard. I'd imagine that's what this is. It isn't designed to be punitive but supportive to make sure the person is actually fit to be back at work and if they need any additional support.

One day for the funeral would be the norm for most employers, I think.
Unless the employee is responsible for making all arrangements etc, then maybe a day or two longer.

I'm seriously surprised by these responses.
My employer is a bog standard private sector company and the policy is 3 days for any bereavement, more if the person is "close" to you (and they allow you to define close, but grandparents etc are explicitly included as an example).
Find it baffling that people wouldn't expect you to be off for more than a day after losing someone who you have known your whole life but wouldn't sniff at being off for a bad headache for example.

My work allows 3 days, I know some people have taken longer, all depends on circumstances

It’s a zero hours contract - so that should mean no guaranteed hours but also no guarantee that the worker will do the hours he’s offered. That’s the only way it can work fairly. He is therefore completely within his rights not to be available for work (although I bet the arrangement is more like they tell him when to work and he has to do what he’s told).

He has to get holiday approved but he let them know he’d be off as you would if you were off sick.

Perhaps it’s how he went about it. I’d ask my manager for bereavement leave, not inform them, as it isn’t a right.

Each company will have its own rules but I didn't take any time off for GPs.

For my mother I got 1.5 weeks. My father died when I was still a student.

One day for the funeral.
time to travel to / from the funeral if it is not local - could be annual leave / unpaid leave ?

For a grandparent I'd say a day for the funeral.

Reading these comments makes me so scared. I still have both my grandparents (mums parents) and they helped bring me up. I see them every week. I will be devastated when they go and I don’t know how to actually cope with losing someone as the last time I lost a family remember I was only 2! I wouldn’t be able to just take a day. It’s sad this is how it is when you’re employed.

When FIL died our DC, one military the other NHS, got the day off for the funeral. DH got a couple of hours off on the actual day he died, then 3 days compassionate, including the day of the funeral.

My work would give you a minimum of 5 days compassionate leave.

more with discretion.

and could be topped up with annual leave

Had a week off when parents died, plus funeral. Brother in law a day plus funeral.
Something really awful happened with child, I had 4 months off. Hard to say what others should do as circumstances and relationships affect how we cope massively. My employers have always been fantastic and I do appreciate that.

I went home early on the day then day off for funeral

I was off work for 4 months with a tragic death in our family. It was a murder and family member was young. My grandad also died in this period but it felt a very different circumstance. I think it depends on a lot of factors but maybe a week or two?