To be annoyed that older people can’t just send a text rather than phoning for the slightest thing?

[Waitingforthesunnydays]

I’ll try not to be ageist here but I might fail at that..so I’m sorry if this offends anyone. If you are over 60 do you feel the need to phone people for things like confirming what time you’ll be arriving that day (after already arranging that you’re coming), letting someone know what colours of paint you’ll be getting for a house renovation, asking someone if they want to go to the cinema with you next week? Those were just examples that popped into my head, but I’m finding it increasingly irritating that the 60 something man that is renovating my house will call me for the slightest thing. It seems he doesn’t know how to text at all as he responds to mine by ringing. Same with my parents, but they get a free pass cos they’re my parents. Same with a neighbour in her 60s who I’m quite friendly with. She rang me the other day, a call which I had to take at work, to say she’d taken my bin in for me, which was very nice of her obviously. But a simply text would have done fine. I’m not talking about very elderly people who don’t know how to use technology, I’m talking about people in their 60s/70s who have had iPhones for at least a decade. Is it just habit or is talking on the phone more common amongst older people? I’m early 40s & I personally hate talking on the phone and will text for everything. I find a phone call quite intrusive, I have to be in the mood to talk to someone, whereas if they would just text me they might get an answer to their question! I can send a text back in any mood but I will often ignore a phone call if I’m not in the mood.
Yes I’m sure I’m being at least a bit unreasonable but it would be nice if everyone could just learn how to text/know how to use text messaging properly. It’s really very easy

My Dad has started moving to calling rather than texting. I suspect either his eyesight is struggling as he ages or he is finding the tiny keyboard hard work. I just put him in my mental group of ring-not-text and let it go to voicemail if it isn’t convenient to answer right that minute. Generally I assume a phone call is a crisis, but not from the non-texters. They are happy to treat a vm like a text and I get visual vm now anyway.

Or voice notes that nobody is listening to.

Dad's eyesight and fine coordination have gone.... So even getting a phone call is a miracle!

Totally agree - in the wider context it’s about older people not moving with the times and adapting to new technology and changing norms. If you don’t keep up you get left behind.

Lol I just realised I do this. Answer the phone then go “sorry I can’t talk” 🤣

You are being ageist. I’m 59. I don’t think I’ve made OR received a phone call of the kind you describe for decades.

I spent a long time telling my DDs that if something is urgent and needs a response to call not text as that is instant, whereas if I'm at home my phone may be in another room and I won't hear a small ting.

"I’m not talking about very elderly people who don’t know how to use technology"

The entire OP is a narrow minded, miserable insult to older people.

The guy doing your house will have other clients. So if he texts you and you don't get back to him straight away, he may be in limbo about organising other appointments/getting parts, so he needs to know straight away.

Also, from what I've observed, he may find it easier to phone you than try to text from a moving van... 😒

YABVVU.
Im 65 now and much prefer texts, WhstsApp or email as apt to phoning. I was an early adopter of email, these aren’t new technologies.
Some older people will of course prefer the phone because of sight issues (I need my reading glasses to read iPhone comfortably, iPad is ok).

So do be sure if you’re generalising about ‘older people’ you’re not being thoughtlessly agist/ablist.

This debate comes up regularly

People have different preferences.

Its not ok for you to force your preferences on them and its not ok for then to force their preference on you.

In short you have to compromise. That means sometimes taking that phonecall and sometimes they text when they would rather use the phone

Your way is not somehow better and their way is not better either. Its preferences

Stop generalising @Waitingforthesunnydays

I am in your ageist bracket and WhatsApp all the time. However, by mutual consent I also have conversations on the phone with people, like my best friend, we ring each other and one adult child rings me as she walks to work. And those conversations are precious to me.
However my default is to WhatsApp.

You obviously have an aversion to phone calls but just stop with the old people texting crap. The answers on this thread have shown to you you have it wrong

Texting is just a digitised version of writing notes or writing a letter. How does that mean people are turning into robots?

Interesting how you went from 'there's a few people in my life who call instead of text and I get annoyed by it', to 'all those people are 'old' so old people are annoying'. Substitute old people with 'black people' or 'gay people' and can you see how prejudiced you are being? And see how you blamed them for your annoyance (which is actually the bit that you bring to the interaction and the only bit you can control). But you know the best bit? You will be old one day (if you are lucky) so you are perpetuating harmful stereotypes that you yourself will be subject to one day.

Oops OP, I’m your worst nightmare. I try to phone rather than text as I think it gives the ‘personal touch’. Might have a rethink now though 🤣.

I'm in my 60s and I will do anything to avoid making a phone call. I'm more than adept at messaging and WhatsApping, thank you very much 😀
I'd be happy to use semaphore or pigeons if it meant I didn't have to actually call someone.

Over 60 and won’t text instead of calling? Give over. I am 60 in a few weeks, I was 28 or 29 when mobile phones became accessible to ordinary people, this is ageist rubbish.

guess what, not only were we one of the first generations to start texting but we can also voice note, set up groups on WhatsApp and FaceTime. Bet that blows your mind!

The only person I call socially is my mum, because she’s 90 and texting is too much.

These over 60,s you are so disparaging about will hsve beeen amongst the first generation of texters

When the most exciting thing you could do with your phone was play snake, they were the generation that invented text speak

70’s here and always text. Phone calls, unless urgent, should be pre-agreed. I don’t have time in my day for pointless chats.

All the people I know over 60 text.

Just turned 50. Am torn because I really don't like long phone calls - I struggle a bit when I can't see the other person's face, and I feel like I can't do anything else when I am on the phone even though I remember my mum pottering about when I was a kid with the (giant) cordless clamped between her ear and shoulder. So on one level I do like a WhatsApp conversation.

But... I also think that we were a bit healthier and happier when we were having real human contact using phones where you couldn't tell who was calling and where if someone called you and you were out you wouldn't necessarily even know (in the days pre answerphones and 1471). I live in a smallish friendly market town and know all my neighbours plus am out and about with my kid and her friends/my friends so I do get a decent amount of natural human socialising, but I can imagine that some people will end up communicating with others almost entirely by typed message and that seems a bit sad and unhealthy to me.

Your bin neighbour sounds a bit lonely to me, OP, on the one hand it's not your job to take care of her but on the other hand you might think about it more as loneliness and wanting to connect, rather than as being a bit annoying and too lazy or inept to text.

It's a personal preference.

I am ok with calls and text/messages, but I absolutely abhor voice messages. They give me the absolute rage.

I much prefer a phone call to endless message conversations. I don't like to have to be looking at my phone more than I already do. Often a phone call can clarify things in 30 seconds that would require 30 annoying messages.

Should You Call or Text? Science Weighs In https://share.google/NpK4OiEBnAiBO6AYl

I am just going to leave this one here it talks of a 2020 study

Oh and btw I am not in your 60+ age group but I prefer a phonecall. I like hearing the voice of people I love and care about it gives me a rush of feel good. Doesnt mean I cant or wont text/use WhatsApp just you know I have a preference

This casual ageism is getting boring.
Steve Jobs, if he was still alive, would be 71 now. That’s right, the chap who brought you the iPhone.
I’m 60 and have been using a mobile phone since 1990 and sending texts since it was possible to do so. I think we have got the hang of them by now.

Yes you’re being ageist. Over 60 here. Generally I’ll use WhatsApp but if it’s going to involve messages going back & forth I’ll call as things can be sorted out quicker just depends on the situation. Not everyone is tied to their phone 24/7.
As a manager my husband has noticed that people are losing the ability to actually communicate clearly in a person to person situation.