To think XH has outdone himself

[BurnoutGP]

DD1 is 24 DD2 Is 18. The father is not a good man or father. DD1 is estranged through no fault of her own. Paternal grandfather died last year and DD2 was told all grandchildren were left 5K.
Few weeks ago a letter arrived for DD2 asking her to attend solicitor with proof of ID/address etc for inheritance. Nothing for DD1. She is currently travelling abroad so we assumed her father had said he didn't know where she was. She emailed the solicitors and got no response. Very upset thinking she had for some reason been left out the will (no reason she loved him and visiting him more than the other grandchildren including DD2). She requested a copy of the will online and it states 5k to all his grandchildren but not named by name.
I rung solicitors who confirmed that XH when asked for a list of his children did not identify her at all so they were unable to communicate with her until her identify was proved. I have since taken in her birth certificate.

They have been estranged for years since she was a teen. After years of letting her down and gaslighting she decided to leave it to him to make contact and he never did. This has affected her hugely. She is so upset about this.
I am sadly not surprised he is a spiteful abusive little man.
AUBU that this is pretty low even for him.

You need to be prepared for when he dies, it sounds as though she will be cut out again. Does DD2 see how terrible he is? They need to not let his behaviour ever affect their relationship.

Bullshit. It’s her grandfather’s will

There is nothing odd in saying "my grandchildren". It avoids having to add codicils or re do the will.If more grandchildren are born later.

Sounds like my family and I’m the eldest daughter as well. My dad had a few others whilst married to mum it all came out when I was a teen.

I’m in my 50s now it’s still awful, I hope things are easier for your DD.

Your ex is a spiteful little shit. Sorry OP

Maybe read the OP before posting a reply?🙄

Ffs seriously, she is a biological grandchild she has every right.

As there seem to be grandchildren from a previous/ other relationship I would have thought for the avoidance of doubt that naming them would have resolved alll issues.

@socks1107

People like you make me mad. Read the post

it’s the grandfather who’s will is being discussed. She was not estranged from him and visited him more than the other grandchildren including her own sister

hence yes she is entitled to money from her GRANDFATHER

clear?

.

She's left it a wee bit late for an abortion now.

Truly awful men can be very nice when they want something
its how abusers operate

Jesus Christ the bar is low for men isn’t it.

What planet are you on @socks1107 . This is abuse of a child. Let’s start calling out men’s behaviour correctly.

I agree it’s awful OP. I knew of something similar but it involved an estranged father and deceased grandmother who the child had lived with. They were very close. The father told the child what was left to them, gave them a cheque and it bounced. No solicitor to assist in that case.

How men can be so bloody vile to their own kids is beyond me.

Why not. Its not his money. It's from her Grandad.

It’s very common to just list “X amount each or X amount split between the grandchildren”. Most people have written their wills years before dying and this covers additional grandchildren being born during that time.

The child was not unknown to the rest of the family.

I am really surprised the solicitor hasn’t seen this before and should have known to check with the grandchildren he was told about, if there were any more.
Surely the executor solicitor should check with each grandchild,’ I have Amy, Ben, Cat, David and Ellie. Is this list complete, and who is missing ? Many thanks’
Or if that breaches GDPR, then a letter to each grandchild to ask to confirm who their brothers and sisters are.
Dear Amy, please confirm you are the only child of Fred, son of grandfather.
Failure to declare a sibling will be considered fraud’
Or similar.
My aunt would have declared that only her kids existed, as money was everything to her, but my cousins would have said no, we have cousins, kids of my mother’s brother.

Very odd the executor solicitor didn’t check better

Can't say I was overly impressed when speaking to the solicitor who insisted I physically take her birth certificate in. Luckily I am local but DD1 is abroad. She also seems to be making the process for DD1 abroad more onerous than Google would suggest it should be.

As despicable as he has behaved, reporting him will only make things worse at this point.

Obv if he doesn't see the will executed correctly you could use this as leverage to get her share.

What. XH needs to realise is that this isn't his money. I was the executor of my mum's will and at times it did feel like I was losing somethig by relinquishing things but ultimately the will overrides any feelings.

How did your ex behave towards DD1 at her granddad's funeral? Waw he rude and dismissive even then?

He sounds like a real piece of work.....

It is worth your daughter informing the grandchild of the 3rd son asap and also emailing the solicitor to let her know there are x number or grandchildren. Is she aware of the 3rd child and his family?

that’ll serve her DF right and is beautiful pay back.

She wasn't estranged from her Grandfather though was she, it's his money and he wanted it to go to ALL of his grandchildren.

The grandfather died, not the father. It says she had a good relationship with grandfather but was estranged from her father :-)

Father is a small and petty man!

Grandad’s will was actually drafted in the best way for his circumstances. He didn’t want to exclude any of his grandchildren so the clause does its job. The fact that the ex committed fraud during the execution of the will does not detract from this. If he had named each grandchild individually any born after the will was signed would have been inadvertently excluded, unless he went to the expensive trouble of updating his will every time one of his children gave birth. That kind of situation is a common consequence of a badly drafted will.

@BurnoutGP please don’t rely on Google for legal advice. I doubt she’s making it more onerous. We constantly have people indicating Google suggests something more simple, when it really isn’t in practice.