To think in the past people had more stoicism and resilience and it’s a shame we’ve sort of lost that?

[Carrotted]

Towards the end of the battle of Waterloo, the Marquess of Uxbridge, a British general, had part of his leg blown off by a French cannonball. He was sitting atop his horse next to the Duke of Wellington, to whom he turned and said “By God, sir, I think I’ve lost my leg”, to which the Duke of Wellington replied “By God, sir, so you have”. He then went to the field hospital where the remaining leg was amputated without anaesthetic, while he joked with the surgeons.

Thats one individual and the story is probably elaborated for effect, but AIBU to think people in previous generations tended to be more stoic in the face of adversity. To have a “get on with it” attitude?

There are obvious downsides to that attitude, but it can have lots of benefits to have that approach to life.

AIBU?

Modern life ( as an example of the passwords below) hasn’t helped matters. What is meant to make life easier , often isn’t and leads to frustration and anger because it can’t just be sorted out easily.
I suppose that’s about having patience, but that soon runs out too!

Blaming the boomers again! Is there anything that isn't our fault?!

I am now going to approach such moments by asking myself ‘What would the Marquess of Uxbridge do?’ The answer would probably be ‘Lead a charge of dragoons at the internet shouting ‘By George, I’ll have your blood!’’

Anyone in danger of being too admiring of the Marquess of Uxbridge’s stoicism might like to hear that he was a lot less stoical about affairs in Ireland, and had a complicated personal life involving an affair with the Duke of Wellington’s married sister-in-law, meaning he got axed from the Peninsular War because Wellington wouldn’t fight alongside him, and a mad and involved story where he had to try to get a divorce from his own wife under Scottish law by being found in bed with his heavily veiled lover by various chambermaids (because she couldn’t have married him if she was named as his lover).

Just wait until you become ill and you'll see just how easy it is. You're either deluded or you're rich enough to not need a safety net.

Doesn't feel like it. It's sad really that after contributing for 50 years now we want a bit of peace and an easy life we're an inconvenience.
I didn't begrudge my tax and ni going to the pensioners of the day.
I truly wish my life had been as easy as I keep getting told it was.

Yanbu to think we could all use some more resilience and stoicism. You don't have to go far to find someone who is offended about something really not terribly offensive. It's all over aibu!

But thay story could be exaggerated and it actually could happen today. Sometimes people do underreact in moments of crisis ot trauma. It is your body's way of coping. I remember a friend breaking her nose and gushing blood and she was chuckling away as if it was all really terribly amusing.

That's minor inconvenience though. Hardly anything to get stressed about.

No everything is our fault and the things that are not our fault are down to Brexit and as every single one of us voted for Brexit everything is our fault anyway.

could not disagree more @SnoreyCat

What I love most about our ~25 - 45 years old is they are less willing to "pay the piper" (ie the ruling classes of power elites and government institutions)

They have resilience in abundance for the things they care about and that is not about propping up those who perpetuate an unfair divide that seems to be getting wider, imo.

Out of curiosity how do you do that?

I think the op was joking although I find navigating on line stuff very stressful indeed. I'm a boomer though so obviously haven't experienced any real anxiety.

It makes me laugh when the (maybe boomers? 😆) go on about teaching resilience. Children are taught loads about resilience. It’s very commonly in their schools values. However as someone who grew up in the 80s/ o90s I certainly wasn’t taught anything about itg

i also always wonder how all these resilient old people managed to completely fail to raise their own children with any resilience?!

or maybe we’re all just as resilient as we always have been?

You think boomers had ‘everything handed to them’?! You’re kidding, right?

<I am NOT boomer>

Firstly, I wish people would stop blaming individuals rather than the system they've grown up in.

Secondly, it's pretty meaningless. At some point, our brains, nervous systems and bodies give up and there's very little we can do. We become chronically ill or we have a nervous breakdown or become addicts. We each have a different threshold. The only way out is to change our situation/environment and generally, things will improve. If we can't change those things, they won't improve. It's a bit like the experiment with mice where they put some mice in a nice, luxurious cage and some in a terrible environment and gave them access to cocaine. The ones in the nice environment didn't use the cocaine.

Anyway I'm waffling on and giving far too much attention to this goady horrible post.

My first thought was just F off so maybe I should have stuck with that.

Yes of course the dreaded boomer generation
No money if you were ill
No maternity leave
No babies out of wedlock, your family had to support you or baby went for adoption.
No hand outs to sit on your arse, work or starve.
No centrally heated home
No car. Bus or walk.
Stay firmly in the closet if you were gay
Children must be seen but not heard.
Women's rights?.forget it.
The mental health card? No chance, grow a pair of balls.
So yeah what a great time was had by all

How do you know that I’m not already ill or unable to work? Either way, I think that you are missing my point; we all deserve a safety net but it should only kick in when we have exhausted our own avenues. That avenue might be taking more exercise and not going to A&E; it could be taking a low paid job and not sitting at home waiting for a better one but people don’t do that, instead in too many instances they expect the state to manage their lives for them.
Financially it’s unsustainable and it’s breeding a state of people who can’t or won’t build resilience to look after themselves.

And now resent anyone else having those things? 😉

Not at the time but you can't deny that many have made hundreds of thousands of pounds from property price increases.

No but those people are the ones complaining abiut boomers "having it all"

<Marquess of Uxbridge has entered the chat>

Lol, another factless boomers bashing comment.

I do think children learn resilience and confidence by experiencing and coping with more challenging or risky situations. Sitting in front of a device does not teach resilience. Walking a mile home in the dark on a rainy night when you are 7 (because your friend's mum, who was meant to pick you both up, forgot) does teach you confidence because you know you can cope.

Constant supervision and protection isn't very good for resilience. However, letting children get on with stuff alone can lead to tragedy. They were probably more resilient in the past but children also had more accidents.

I take it you've not had much to do with the NHS lately. You really do need to be your knees (literally and metaphorically).

Hardly surprising, when just about every other person seems to have anxiety/depression/be suffering from stress, and it’s virtually illegal nowadays to tell anyone just to get a fucking grip.

Children no longer have it routinely dinged into them that we all have to do things we don’t like sometimes (or often!) so it’s no use whingeing - just get on with it.

There used to be a lot of ‘Just do as you’re bloody well told!’ too - I dare say that’s illegal nowadays, too.

Constantly blaming others clearly shows lack of resilience and accountability 🤷‍♀️