So, how is it actually possible for our adult kids to ever move out of home?

[cateringday]

I’m imagining it’s the same for a lot of people.
two kids 20 and 18, they both actually have £10000 in the bank as an inheritance but can’t see how they would ever get enough for a deposit or pay a mortgage. If they rent then all that money will be gone anyway.

how old are kids leaving home these days

we live in the south east

This It seems to be only recently that young people have started to expect to be able to go straight from living at home to being homeowners.

Yep.
We have no bother keeping staff that have been here years, it’s getting new ones to allow us to expand that’s the issue.

They are hopeless, and it is all down to attitude. I recently offered an unskilled, unqualified worker a permanent contract as he’d done work experience with us. He’d applied for the permanent role and I thought he seemed keen to progress. The job was above his current skill set, but I explained that we would provide training and put him through qualifications if he could commit to the role and work hard to achieve. It was a golden opportunity to progress, with a starting salary of £34k plus vehicle.

He started work then had a week off for vague reasons. Then asked for a meeting, where he told me he’d heard other people doing his job (with 20 years in the role) got paid more than him. He said I should up his pay, and also he didn’t like that he was taxed every month which makes it ‘not fucking worth it know wot I mean’ so I should also increase pay to cover this.

When I declined he badmouthed us far and wide as ‘slave labourers.’

This is not an uncommon story amongst employers at the moment.

My ds 25 is home saving for a deposit, he thinks rental’s a waste. We’ll give him 50/60k for deposit but won’t get much where we are. Dd on the other time is buying a house with her partner who has a trust fund.. so hard to see one struggle and one not.

*other hand

I have always found it surprised how early it is expected to move out out of your parents home in the UK.

That is very interesting as larger companies who have to adhere to complex HR policies favour youth over experience.

Smaller companies prioritise experience but have ceased hiring or sold.

Basically, once the young secure their first position and stay for a relative time period they become very desirable to employers as long as the strong work ethic Is prevalent.

I moved out in 2018 so it is a while ago but I did uni, lived in halls, then rented a shit tip and lived peasant life for a while. Met now DH and we pooled our resources and rented a slightly less shitty flat. We put our deposit on our first house (which wasn’t a nice house and it wasn’t in a nice area). It kind of sucked but also it was great in some ways because I got to live on my own. Living at home into adulthood simply was not an option and I was willing to tough it out to get where we are now. It was hard and it wasn’t always fun - watching the gas and electric bills, not putting on the heating, living off beans on toast while I waited for pay day, but it was possible. Worth it though. My mum and dad moved up to Scotland a few years ago to live closer, we actually have a nice house now, and everything worked out well and I appreciate being able to put the heating on whenever I want.

Thats beyond shocking.

They’ll have to move away from the South East. The midlands is much cheaper?

I did it in 1987…

Struggle 🤣

of my three oldest sons 2 moved away shortly after uni to big metropolitan areas. Both are renters and struggling financially. The third one just turned 25. He is living at home rent free, making a high wage and last I knew had $65,000 USD in the bank. He seems perfectly content t live at home.

Would they buy together? I’m in SW Greater London and here you get a 2 bed flat in the less nice part of town - still ok just a bit tattier - for 320k. After deposit that’s 150k each. They’d need to earn 30k each and get a mortgage for 5x.

Plenty of people in their 40s left home a very long time ago and still can’t afford to buy a home and get a mortgage. Worrying how an 18 and 20 year old will get a mortgage is pointless. It’s not the 90s anymore, long term rental is a reality for many many people.

Also live in the South East. My eldest bought a flat studio flat and moved out when he was 22. He then bought a three bedroom house last year when he'd just turned 29. My youngest went to uni then moved home as it was peak covid. He moved into rented at 25 and is now buying a flat at 27. Neither of them have had any help from us in terms of deposits or contributions other than they only paid £200 a month whilst they lived at home so they could save.

Neither have particularly well paying jobs. One was a PT and the other works at Lidl. What they are both very good at is saving from their salaries. No expensive cars, the latest phone model or holidays and this obviously makes a difference to how much they could save towards a deposit.

I do think part of the issue now is around our children's generation expectations on what they should have. They want the latest everything and the best first property when actually a phone is a phone and a car is a car and it doesn't matter if your first property is a studio flat.

Well done, you brought them up well. You must be so proud of them. It shows what is still possible.

Most people want to move out and have some independence. I left for uni at 18 and never went back.

Yeah me too. I used to hire people for entry level runner jobs in television. I wouldn't even consider them if they had no work experience. Media degrees were much less relevant than a job in retail or hospitality for the kinds of things we needed them to do. You can learn the media stuff as you go.

I’m in the UK, but the UK isn’t a country. It’s 3 plus a bit of another one. In my country, the experiences on here are also surprising to me!

I have children in their twenties - we are in London. One lives with boyfriend in small 1 bed flat. She earns a bit more so bears larger proportion of rent. Can’t afford to buy.

Second child currently at home as landlord sold property she rented with flatmates and nothing else
was within price range. Her boyfriend who is renting is planning for flat deposit with inheritance, if he can afford anything, and then they will move in together. Likely a small 1 bed in crap area.

Yes it is possible to exist but no quality of life and lack of money for anything else.

Most people I know, moved into cheap house shares until they met a partner, then either rented or got a mortgage with a combined salary 🤷‍♀️

Oh come on now, you must realise that 99 percent of families cannot afford to do this. What a ridiculous thing to suggest.

My DD has had to pay £180 today to go through the credit checks to rent. She won't get it back. I know people who have spent nearly £1k applying to rent. Then around six weeks worth of rent is needed (deposit etc) so another £1.5k . These are mediocre two/three bed terrace houses. It isn't like it was were you move in with a weeks rent upfront. My DD is inadequately housed in disrepair, working, one child with disabilities, one without, but has no chance of social housing. It isn't that people expect to own straight away, they can't afford to rent and we don't have enough adequate, affordable properties to rent. A lot of posters are talking about grotty flats after UNI, the majority of people don't have the same earning capacity. There won't be a future beyond that first flat.

I also think it’s all relative because as much as I love my family once I got a taste of not living in one there’s no way you could drag me back to the council estate. I thought uni halls were heaven on earth. If I’d had a nice house in a nice area to go home to maybe it would be different but going back to a shithole after going to a nice uni would have probably made me clinically depressed. I didn’t even like going home for Christmas and actually hosted my mum and brother in my shared house instead of go home for a couple of years.

Both my two moved out, one with a partner one on their own. We are also South East. They both saved a lot when they started earning and were able to scrape a deposit together. Oldest went to uni and then saved when they got back, youngest saved all the way through. They moved out at 23 and 23 respectively. As long as they're prepared to sacrifice to save they can do it.