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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Despite his villainous behaviour, anyone feel a teeny bit sorry for Andrew?

886 replies

busymomtoone · 19/02/2026 21:55

Before I get totally flamed, I despise his attitude, and the things he appears to have done - particularly the subsequent lying and apparent determination to shield/ hide misdemeanours. However, seeing the photo of his release today looking a broken man after such huge public downfall , plus thinking of him going back to an empty house on his birthday with no family support - even though I initially felt he deserves every indignity and consequence - there’s still a teeny part of me that just can’t help feeling just a little bit sorry for him. If it’s true that he was taken to a brothel at age 11 , whilst it would in no way excuse abusing others , it means he has also been a victim of abuse. Additionally it seems the Queen and his entourage have never ever said no to him in his whole life- so to reach his 7th decade before any consequences hit makes me question how resilient he will be able to be. Obviously main sympathies are always rightly with any victims , but even the most hardened and perpetual criminals often retain family support, he seems to have nobody. ( albeit if his own making ) or am I just being too soft?!

OP posts:
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TheRuffleandthePearl · 20/02/2026 00:18

Jacopo · 19/02/2026 22:50

I’m just furious that the major players in all of this are getting with (possibly) murder, and definitely with serious sexual assaults, because the judiciary in the USA are totally nobbled by their political administration. Yes Andrew should be called to account - but what about all of the rest of them!!!

Yes this. US has done nothing with all the info. It’s sickening.

BeanQuisine · 20/02/2026 00:18

Barnbrack · 19/02/2026 23:34

🤢🤮 how obscene when considered alongside the stories of babies in the Epstein files. If that baby had been born a different time and place he could have been trafficked to a millionaire paedophile like JE victims, that trafficking enabled and covered up by powerful men like Andrew mount attention windsor.

That photo is a stark and horrific reminder of the accident of birth that leads to such level of inequality

Can't really blame the baby though. His upbringing more-or-less ensured his worst traits of privilege and entitlement would be encouraged.

Had he been brought up in a more normal family environment, with more laudable role models (Philip was a swinish fool and Charlie is a bit of a nutcase), he might have turned out a better man.

Supersimkin7 · 20/02/2026 00:20

Quite. AMScapegoat is a dismal freak, some of the others are wicked and traitors to boot.

VG died because afaik her alcoholism lost her custody of her DC. Awful, and the first person I’d arrest would be her DF who handed his own 15-yr-old DD to Epstein.

DeepBlueDeer · 20/02/2026 00:21

Supersimkin7 · 20/02/2026 00:08

Andrew Mountbatten Scapegoat.

None of the politicians - who did have sensitive stuff to leak - has been arrested.

Whiffy.

You can't arrest someone just because they "could" have done something, you need evidence. At the moment, the only UK politician with any evidence against them (so far as I am aware) is Mandelson - who is already under investigation (and I imagine it will be a longer investigation because of the sheer volume of information that he would have had easy access to).

One person being arrested before another person isn't so much "whiffy" as it is (all but) inevitable, particularly when investigated by two different regional police departments who probably aren't all that worried about synchronizing their watches.

justhowdoyouknow · 20/02/2026 00:21

TortoiseshellNell · 20/02/2026 00:18

I feel the man has been punished enough. He’s lost everything that counts - reputation, family, friends, purpose. He is a broken shell.

I know he did bad stuff but I see he is in a very dark place - and instinctively, I feel sorry for him - for his upbringing that made him arrogant and entitled, for his stupidity and total lack of judgement.

At the same time I absolutely recognise how much his victims have suffered. It’s a sad, sad situation.

Yeah, shit happens when you are a pervert and you use your power to control others.

McSpoot · 20/02/2026 00:21

Smilesinthesunshine · 19/02/2026 23:53

Absolutely!!

Had George Floyd been arrested, he would not have gotten support (we’d not even know about him). There is no parallel to support for Andrew now.

PithyViewer · 20/02/2026 00:21

I'm not sure, because I'm unclear on what he's supposed to have done except sleep with Virginia. I think that was gross of him, because she was much younger and because, at best, he must have thought she was a willing and well-paid prostitute. I'm not sure if he knew she was trafficked.

There is just SO much coverage, and nothing proved (although recent things from the Epstein files appear to prove that Virginia was telling the truth). But apart from her, I can't get a handle on what's real and what's not, and what else he's meant to have done. The coverage is overwhelming and also affects my mental health. So I'm on the fence, given that there don't seem to be any clear charges against him. At least, none that I can see without reading deeply about Epstein, and - I can't say this strongly enough - I REALLY REALLY have better things to do than roll in his dirt.

viques · 20/02/2026 00:22

No. He had every opportunity in life to make a decent fist of a role for himself but instead chose to be a lazy, greedy, misogynistic entitled liar with no understanding of the concepts of honesty or honour.

Supersimkin7 · 20/02/2026 00:23

Agreed. No one in the US has been charged either.

It’s really important they get as many of these buggers as they can.

Andrew being the sole scalp is not good enough.

CantBreathe90 · 20/02/2026 00:24

I've not been following it closely. Is the main gripe against him that he was using sex workers? Some of which were underage in their country of origin, but not in the UK? Or has something else come to light - I'm not sure what being "inappropriate in office" means. If the former, I feel sorry for him insomuch as I always assumed most men (and probably a fair few women) in power did this. He's been unlucky enough to get caught. Not saying I agree with what he's done, obviously. But we're in a society that appears for the most part to agree with and legitimise gross amounts of inequality. Historically, the use of (young) sex workers, was an extension of this. It's nieve to think it's any different today, so I don't understand the degree of moral outrage there's been. Again, unless I'm not up to date and there's more I've missed (quite possible).

Scout2016 · 20/02/2026 00:25

socialdilemmawhattodo · 20/02/2026 00:13

This is where I feel. Not having read any of today's news. There are probably far more influential American men who seem to be shielded. I would prefer for that stack to be toppled. I think AMW was probably always intended to be a public scapegoat. He was flattered so went along. Let's get the BIG players. There is seemingly no intention to go for them. Why not?

Maybe Andrew could speak up anout what he witnessed and do something to help the victims, instead of bullshit lies on PR TV interviews aimed at saving his own skin. He's tried and failed to help himself and done nothing for those women and girls. If the others are to be convicted someone needs to break ranks and speak up.

On a related note, what was that £12million payment all about? Wasn't about his desire to help the course of justice and bring criminals to account was it.

TheRuffleandthePearl · 20/02/2026 00:25

Strngerthings · 19/02/2026 23:03

well look at all the support there was for George Floyd, and yet his criminal activities etc

So he deserved to die slowly and painfully on the street, calling for his Mama? I bet you think Alex kicking a tail light also deserved 10 bullets in him too.

Barnbrack · 20/02/2026 00:27

BeanQuisine · 20/02/2026 00:18

Can't really blame the baby though. His upbringing more-or-less ensured his worst traits of privilege and entitlement would be encouraged.

Had he been brought up in a more normal family environment, with more laudable role models (Philip was a swinish fool and Charlie is a bit of a nutcase), he might have turned out a better man.

He grew up in wealth and privilege.

He never had to worry where his next meal would come from, if his family would pay the bills and he'd end up homeless, never had to worry he couldn't afford the next ig thing clothes wise or whatever. All the things children all over the country have to worry about.

Children grow up in all kinds of horrible. Neglectful. Overpriveleged. Abused. Neglected. Spoilt etc etc environments. Some people in all of those scenarios grow up to do very bad things. Why is privilege and wanting for nothing and excuse for hideous behaviour?

LizzieW1969 · 20/02/2026 00:28

Pepperlee · 19/02/2026 22:27

You don't know that for sure. I wish people wouldn't take their own thoughts as truth. It's just what you think. And she was a woman when she died...not a girl.

And even if it’s true that she killed herself (I have my doubts myself that she did, I suspect foul play personally), it wouldn’t have been because of AMW particularly. She suffered SA at the hands of others, including her own father. This will have been the worst betrayal (believe me, I’ve been there). There was also Epstein himself and probably others.

Anyway, I happen to think she was silenced, like Epstein himself probably was

To answer the OP’s question, no I don’t feel the least bit sorry for AMW. He deserves everything he gets now.

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · 20/02/2026 00:29

I haven't felt even the tiniest shred of compassion for Andrew, honestly.

But I voted yanbu because I have felt the kind of pity that you describe before when watching people fall from grace because of their own despicable behaviour. I can't actually think of any examples now, but there is something quite tragic about seeing someone having been the architect of their own downfall. You can undoubtedly pity someone while utterly abhorring their crimes.

But somehow, this one leaves me cold. I feel nothing but disgust for him. And anger.

Shonainthecastle · 20/02/2026 00:29

As well as being a disgusting sleaze (at least), he is also a traitor to this country because he has definitely passed sensitive confidential information to JE when he was working as trade envoy.

Ladamesansmerci · 20/02/2026 00:29

No, jesus.

He's not a young man who has grown up troubled in foster care with a trauma history, or etc. He is a powerful and rich man with every privilege in the world who has been involved in horrible sexual crimes, trafficking, and grooming (either directly or indirectly). He deserves everything that will come his way.

canuckup · 20/02/2026 00:30

🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 😂 😂

Not an ounce. Not a tiny jot.

Goatsarebest · 20/02/2026 00:31

I dont feel sorry for him but they released 3 million documents and so far those 3 million have only resulted in this. I know it has to start with someone, but this really must be the start and not the end.

alondonerabroad · 20/02/2026 00:33

I don’t feel sorry for him or what he’s done. He did everything in the full knowledge and expectation that he was untouchable. I do think he’s a stooge or a patsy as he’s such a well known name. Others have done similar or far worse but he’s the one in the public eye and therefore can be made an example of. He didn’t do himself ANY favours at that interview and really showed himself to be an arrogant petulant petty little boy. It’s been 6 years since Epsteins death, why is it still only him and ghislaine taking the fall?

LizzieW1969 · 20/02/2026 00:35

^I completely agree. We don’t want AMW to simply be the fall guy, whilst other perpetrators get off Scot free. They should all face their just deserts.

LizzieW1969 · 20/02/2026 00:39

alondonerabroad · 20/02/2026 00:33

I don’t feel sorry for him or what he’s done. He did everything in the full knowledge and expectation that he was untouchable. I do think he’s a stooge or a patsy as he’s such a well known name. Others have done similar or far worse but he’s the one in the public eye and therefore can be made an example of. He didn’t do himself ANY favours at that interview and really showed himself to be an arrogant petulant petty little boy. It’s been 6 years since Epsteins death, why is it still only him and ghislaine taking the fall?

Others are in the public eye as much as he is, actually, though not so much in this country. (Obviously Trump is, though he’s like Teflon, so I don’t think he’ll ever be properly investigated for his own involvement with Epstein.)

Emigree · 20/02/2026 00:39

Nope, not at all.
It pisses me off though, that all these guys are more likely to face consequences for their political and economic misdemenors, when multiple women and girls have been telling of their abuse for years.
The whole bunch of nonces should face real consequences for the abuses they chose to commit.

TheRuffleandthePearl · 20/02/2026 00:40

Barnbrack · 19/02/2026 23:40

Support for someone murdered publicly by state police forces is a proportionate response.

If george floyd had been taken for questioning for a crime, released on bail to await trial I doubt there'd have been much out ry.

If a group of police officers had picked up Andrew, held him down and proceeded to kneel on his neck while he cried for his mother until he suffocated to death despite onlookers videoing in horror and asking them to stop I think most people probably would feel some compassion for him.

Can you see the difference there?

George floyd was murdered without trial by the police due to suspicion of robbing a convenience store. AMH has been taken on for questioning and released pending further investigation despite decades of sex trafficking allegations and now evidence coming to light of sharing state secrets with a convicted sex trafficking paedophile.

Please tell me you understand why people's responses to your straw man argument are incredulity?

Thank you for this articulate response to the batshittery non-thinking.

THEDEACON · 20/02/2026 00:42

Absolutely NOT Id charge him with treason and put him in the Tower