Has anyone on here ever made you cry?

[belvitias]

I’m embarrassed to say I have. I don’t really post much anyway. I usually just read and scroll, but I have let some comments get to me before.

One time, someone called me a cunt, which I know isn’t horrendously awful, but it just really got to me. In my 30 years, I think I’ve only used that word once when I called an ex that after I found out he cheated on me. People here throw that word around for the tiniest reasons.

Another time was when I shared my concerns about my sister’s new boyfriend. He was showing signs of being controlling and coercive, and I just didn’t think he was right for her. I was genuinely worried about her and wanted some advice. Omg, the backlash and comments from people asking if I was single, saying I must be because I sounded so bitter and jealous that she had a man. They were saying how lonely and sad I must be to try to ruin her relationship, just really personal and nasty. Yes, I admit it upset me.

I know you need to have thick skin on social media, but it can be hard sometimes. We’re all human at the end of the day. So, just out of curiosity, if you feel like sharing, has anyone on Mumsnet ever upset you that much?

No - never. You would do well to remember that this site and indeed all SM sites are infested with bad actors who would call Mother Teresa a cunt if they could. It can't be personal because they don't know you. They wouldn't say it to your face.
You should report such comments and don't let them put you off posting. A lot of people don't have anything in their lives except calling strangers on the internet cunts. Feel sorry for them because they will never be at peace!

No. Couldn’t care enough.

There are some vile people out there op, as a pp said they get brave behind a screen

There are vile people and stupid people on MN who love a good pile on.

It never used to be like this.

I've not cried myself in answer to your question. I do enjoy poking ridiculous people back though if they try to poke me. Then when I get bored of their ridiculousness, I just ignore them.

In some way, I actually feel a little sad for those posters who seem so invested, if all they've got in life is trying to make others upset.

I'm sorry to hear that posters made you cry when you were trying to ask for help about your sister.

I've never cried but I have had a kind of nasty taste in my mouth after reading some things people have said to me on here. I hate the casual, hostile rudeness that characterises some people's posts, even though I know their unpleasantness is not really much to do with anything I have said or done.

No but I am really shocked at the way people speak to each other on here. Beyond rude and sometimes really vicious. I'm sorry it's happened to you though, people can be horrible

You've never been moved to tears about someone else's issue? An ill child, a dying partner or a posters own sad circumstances?

maybe have a think about that

There are no consequences if someone slates the OP, well none that I know of. Their comment might get deleted but that’s about it. It’s all anonymised.

No. I ignore any shitty comments, I don’t give them head space, roll my eyes and move on with my day. I don’t respond to anyone who’s being a dick directly to me. I can understand people getting upset if they’re posting for advice and not in a great place mentally getting upset though. I’ve often challenged nasty comments when someone’s being an arse to an OP who’s clearly struggling. Edited to add I turned notifications off a year or so ago because I couldn’t be bothered with them so unless I return to a thread I don’t see if someone’s quoted me/liked a post.

Absolutely brilliant response. Someone wound me up on here today and I just thought: "Well that's troll behaviour right there" - why would I let a random person impact me in that way? They don't know me IRL. They are not my friend. Some people just get off on being vile - which makes their lives small and sad.

And bingo! The first poster having a dig at poor Op.

I posted asking for advice and support with a situation - I was (still am) exhausting myself caring for my elderly mother. I posted in the elderly parents area, I think really I wanted some solidarity and comfort as much as anything else. I got some useful comments but there were also some comments that really made me feel like a useless failure.

I’ve noticed this trend in the past few years, that there are some people on here who enjoy a drama, and will argue with you, deliberately disagree with you, make out that what you are saying is ridiculous, just because they enjoy the conflict.

Thank you, and that's so true. You said it perfectly “it can't be personal because they don't know you."

I've never cried but I have deregistered and taken a break from being here once for the sake of my mental health when two posters in particular had been complete arseholes on a thread I'd started. I came back when I had developed the resilience to not give a shit what random anonymous Internet users think, and know when to walk away from a thread rather than try to argue with stupid.

Mother Theresa genuinely was a cunt though.

I think people on here offload all of their negative emotions behind a screen because they know there are no repercussions. So what, someone can report your post but no more than that. You’d never hear half the comments made on here in real life. Sorry you’ve been made to feel like shit.

That's not what is being asked - has someone made you cry is the title of the post and the content of the post is clear that it's about being targeted offensively online. I am sure many people have been moved by people's posts on here - I have - but that is absolutely not what this thread is even remotely about.

I know, the bloody irony on this thread of all places. Just proving the point.

Never. I couldn't get worked up or upset about a random nobody on the internet firing insults at me. I couldn't care less. 25-ish years of being on message forums has hardened me! 😆

I'm sorry you were upset though @belvitias I hope you reported that comment.

Deleted. I misread something. Sorry!

.

Yeah a while back I had my universal credit sanctioned for missing an appointment. I have schizophrenia. They sanctioned me for three months and I had barely any food. I came on here crying as I wrote it out only to be met with mega vitriol getting called lazy and it's my own fault etc etc. I cried. I felt like part of it was contempt for me being on benefits.

I hope I can be like this someday 😆 I’m a sensitive soul I think!

No, though I got so angry when a poster made remark around my DM death during Covid. I said she wasn’t huge at 14 stone, they thought it was hilarious. I genuinely wanted to punch them. 🫣
MN has definitely got worse over the years, like all SM it gives people the opportunity to be an absolute dick/head.

No worries, if you were referring to the 7th post then you were absolutely right!!

I don't think anyone ever made me cry, but I may have cried at other people's sad stories before - maybe a couple of times over the years. I think I may have shed a tear when a much loved poster sadly died many years ago.
I have felt incredibly angry at people who post unnecessarily vile stuff on threads where the OP is clearly in a fragile state - I see it all the time, and it is definitely worse than ever now. I think yes, it's SM, it's anonymous - but it's a real person there.