To think therapists are mostly charlatans?

[BlueJuniper94]

I've heard in real life of people who have made radical decisions/changes in their lives because of what a "therapist" has said to them. Things that have surprised me as it seems outside the scope of what I thought therapists are there to do (although it's perhaps not entirely clear what that is now).

Today I was listening to woman's hour where a woman being interviewed about her husband walking out on her and her kids tried to keep it from them for a month as per her therapists advice which she said looking back was the wrong thing to do. I am surely this therapist was handsomely paid nonetheless. Aibu?

@idontknowhowtodreamyourdreams depends though. If you were after CBT you’d need a BABCP accredited therapist. The BACP is full of counsellors who have done a short course in CBT and think it’s just handing out a few sheets of paper. If you wanted EMDR you’d need someone accredited elsewhere after BACP or BABCP accreditation. I find a lot the BABCP accredited therapists have jumped through more hoops and their reaccreditation requirements are more stringent and have stronger clinical training than a BACP therapist. Though there are many very good BACP therapists of course.

such a shame that therapist isn’t a protected title like Clinical Psychologist is @CrazyGoatLadyas there are some wonderful ones in my experience. (And also some worrying ones, alongside worrying social workers, teachers, medics etc…)

Therapist here (psychotherapist, counsellor, therapist - call it what you like as not protected), and in total my training has been across 5 years postgraduate with a ‘core profession’. BACP BABCP registered and other core reg as well.

However, whilst protected titles/registration are crucial, boundaries/workplace management/supervision and experience are equally as important!

I think they’re just human beings doing their best at their jobs. Like in any profession, some are better than others, and sometimes they make mistakes and give wrong advice. Anyone who takes their advice as gospel needs to remember it’s not infallible.

I would never trust a therapist and would never have any sort of therapy/ counselling ever again after my raw notes of our session were sent to my GP without my permission - the notes contained a very damaging comment from the therapist based on opinion and not fact, and are now stuck on my file. Not only was the comment damaging and sickening/lie, but to see my session notes I felt so violated.

This is utter nonsense. The emergency services do answer calls from overseas numbers, 999 and 112 will both work if they're located in the UK.

You assess the person's risk to themselves and to/from others and find out where the person is based, assuming in the UK, then if they're actively suicidal you find their local crisis response service or single point of access and support them to refer to an actual crisis team or Safer Space, if they have one. There are many, many more crisis services out there than Samaritans. Or you call the emergency services for them, if they need to attend A&E or can't keep themselves safe.

There, a bit of free training for you. There's more free training out there, like NHS England Staying Safe from Suicide.

You are clearly working well outside your competence if you didn't know this very basic stuff. And yes, you should not be engaging in depth beyond offering to help them with a referral to a suitable crisis service. Better still, turn your work phone off at night so you're not spending your evenings getting pulled into rescuing people.

My cpn was the worst therapist I've ever had to work with she was nothing but about ticker . Who just thought I could think my way out of anorexia nervosa

Read my first post. I got an unsolicited message. My only options were to engage or to not engage. I have no idea why the uk emergency services don’t answer an international call but they don’t, so engaging seem like the best choice.

Well “good therapy” is relative. As I said, I do believe it has value to certain personality types, but a degree of excessive self-interest (and willingness to suspend disbelief over how unbearably trivial they might sound) seems to be a prerequisite for success. I am aware there are causes of depression that may be related to trauma or experience rather than brain chemistry, but I’m fucked if I want to listen to myself wang on about it week after week. It’s just not very interesting, and nothing a therapist can credibly suggest is beyond the wit of anyone who has a passing familiarity with basic psychology. I found myself wishing I could use the time to crack on with something productive, like the ironing, which I suspect would have had equal therapeutic value.

How are you getting unsolicited messages in an evening? I presume it was via a work number …don’t you switch it off when the working day is over?
If you really felt like you needed to engage, you should have directed them to a crisis services/emergency services. Not engaged in a back and forth for the evening. Really very bizarre and completely unboundaried.

That response says more about you than the people you imagine you’re describing. For instance, I’m not having talk therapy at all. I’m seeing a somatic therapist who works with EMDR and other techniques. I’m finding these effective as a way of dealing with the ongoing effects of being raped when I was ten. I’m neither depressed nor excessively self-interested, nor is there anything amiss with my brain chemistry.

Because you are not given to analysis of your thought patterns and how you relate to others does not mean that you are right that attending therapy involves ‘excessive self-interest’. It’s not self indulgent to want to get better whether that’s from mental health challenges or physical ones.

Changing your perspective on past events and changing the unhelpful patterns you have fallen into can be incredibly helpful for many people. In fact in the end it can make you less self-absorbed as you are less burdened by internal conflicts.

Certainly my therapist had the patience and the insight to help me break out of many unhelpful thought processes that had dogged me for many years. No one else in my life would have had the knowledge and quite frankly the inclination to do that.

It’s fine to say that therapy isn’t for you. It’s unfair to imply it’s only for self obsessed bores when it has helped many, many people.

People need to excercise their own brain as rare as the idea seems to be these days

That’s very risky practice. If they’re in Portugal there’s literally nothing you can do to safely manage the risk. Does your insurance cover you for practice outside the UK and do you have safety protocols in place for international clients?How did they come to randomly message you and why would you engage beyond making an appointment?

Many people interpret differently to what occured.

An example

My therapist thinks I am on the autistic spectrum..

What happened?

Client. I struggle in social settings
Therapist. Have you ever considered if you moght be on the autistic spectrum?

Therapis had done what they are there to do. To make their client think and look at their own thought processes. Doesnt mean they think their client is on the autistic spectrum. Could be a way to aid their client to consideer things in a different light.

Nope but it’s the definition of poor and unprofessional boundaries I’m afraid.

I am by no means an expert, but I was talking about NHS therapists (and the thread is about therapists), who I believe are more highly qualified than counsellors, aren't they?

That’s pretty poor practice. Much better for the client to explore what those struggles are, how they experience their own struggle, how they make sense of why they struggle and whether that feeling is around in therapy. It’s the therapists job to help the client understand themselves better, not to offer a label they aren’t qualified to give.

The client will go away from that interaction thinking “my therapist says I’m autistic”.

No they’re really not. In some cases you’ll be seeing a CPN with a weekend course in CBT.

You were clearly not in the right frame of mind (for whatever reason) to engage in therapy. And that's fine. If you were sitting there bored by your own "wanging on" and wanted to be doing the ironing then I hope you ended the sessions so as not to waste their time or yours.
Yes, it can be excruciating talking about yourself - I'm sure people who don't think or talk about themselves a great deal, are disproportionately represented in those being advised to have some therapy.
Many people find themselves in therapy because, despite knowing basic psychology, need support from someone else (well qualified) to help them feel themselves again, or function well day to day, or to get out of a big black hole.

Ah right. As I said, I'm not expert. I have very limited personal experience and mine was very positive.

You sound angry. Why do you think that is?

Could it be a case of people thinking if they dont hear what they want to hear then every therapist must be wrong?

I don't think I'd word it as the OP does. And I have met a few therapists I really respect.

But gods, just look at the number who seem completely willing to buy into gender ideology bollocks to the point of medicating young kids. It has to make you wonder.

More personally, I have met a lot of therapists I really question, people who seem to struggle with their own mental health, boundaries, and understanding other people. I'd take advice from my dog before many of them.

I wouldn't trust my cat with the clinical psychologist I know.
She has no life experience whatsoever, completely dependent on family and cannot function in social environments. She has an opinion about everything, and has no personal experience about anything. Having been at the receiving end of her unsolicited advice, I dread to think what she says to clients.

i have not found it easy to find the right therapist for me. Someone who isn’t the right fit could do more harm than good.