Is the commute justifiable?

[ByGoldHare]

Hi everyone, it’s my first time posting and would love to hear your thoughts this.
I have twin girls who will start nursery school this September. We got accepted into our catchment school (2 min drive or 15 mins walk with my kids) and also a slightly further out rural village school (12 min drive + potentially parking on the street and then walk 7-8 mins).
The local school is a “good” school and has a 3 form entry. I did like it when I first visited but felt the staff were too busy to give individualised attention to all the kids.
Then we found this village school which has only one form entry and absolutely loved it when we visited. It’s much smaller and has a close community feel. But it is quite a hassle to get there, park and walk. I know it’s not a big deal but it’s also graded “outstanding” by ofsted.
I guess my question is, should I go with my gut that the smaller school is better for my kids? Or should I take the easy way and send them to the local school? It is a big commitment to drive them there back and forth, but thankfully I’m in a position to be a full time mum as my husband’s job can support the family comfortably.
On top of that, I just found out I’m pregnant with number 3, which we are thrilled about but it will make school drop off logically much harder.
Please I would love to hear fr

I’d go for the smaller village school every time.

We had a very similar choice. I don’t even consider the local catchment school. My 3 choices were all about 10 minutes drive away.

It is the best decision we’ve ever made. As there are almost no catchment children at the village school, the class is made up of children whose parents actively sought out and chose the school in favour of their respective local catchment schools. This means there are far more engaged parents which is a huge positive.

The school carries out way more events, trips and social activities than any of the local schools do where the majority of children attend by default rather than choice. Parental funding for these activities is huge vs the local schools.

Another added benefit is that the school is a feeder school to the best secondary school in the county so not only do you get a great experience at primary, you also get access to a seconds school you’d normally not get into unless you moved house into an expensive area.

I was surprised how many local parents didn’t even consider anything other than their catchment school. They really weren’t that interested in education and considered all schools to be the same. They most definitely aren’t.

I would definitely choose the bigger local school. I made the mistake (twice) of choosing the smaller school for my kids and all it really does is limits their friendship pool and options of school clubs. Going to bigger schools was the making of both of them in the end.

100% the bigger school. Gives your twins space if they need it, local walkable friends, easier life for you.

I have a friend with twins who wanted them in separate classes from year 3 onwards due to some issues and that wouldn't have been possible in such a small school.
As others have said the transition to high school.is a bit easier from a big school & although he drive isn't far it would be easier when they are older to be able to walk to/from.school on their own and walk to friends' houses in the holidays etc

Go for the good/ bigger school nearby.
That commute will be a nightmare for years and years.
Don't underestimate how hard it will be.
I wouldn't dream of sending to a smaller school because of the experiences of friends.
Bigger classes, wide variety of friends IMO.

Fully agree with this. My kids went to a two form entry school - small, friendly, very family oriented. My older daughter’s year was the first to have the second form, it was one form prior to that. I can’t lie, my kids really benefited from this when younger but by the time they got to Year 3, it felt really small. There was no variety of friendships and the resources in a small school are much more limited compared to a bigger school. Also if your kid has any friendship difficulties, there is no escape as there isn’t another class to move them to. It’s hard to imagine your kids being 9-10-11 years old but they get there very quickly and their needs become very different. The ability for the to walk to school with their friends in Year 5 (giving them independence) and then the move to secondary together with the kids they know was priceless. Personally, I’d be looking at the bigger school from the start.

I’ve had children in both.

My eldest went to a small, one form Catholic primary. It was really lovely to be fair, but agree with others it limits friendships and found it a bit cliquey.

Youngest goes to a bigger two form entry school and that’s been absolutely fine.

Given that the bigger school is closer I’d go for that one.

Also consider school finances and budgets - Will the small one form entry even be around in a few years?

I think we are just about to get in as it’s quite rural and it’s not uncommon for them to take students from up to where we live.

i'd definitely go for the closer school. having friends and community within walking distance is a big boost to your quality of life.

Yes that is my main concern actually with the one form entry. They are so identical that they might be considered as one person.

I think they have capacity for 30 kids per year

I think nursery school will be around 20 and then reception 30

You mention you live in a rural place. I think in that case local is much better. Your little ones will grow and want to play with their friends - better to make these friends locally to be visited by foot or bike, especially if you have three with different friends and interests.

A close school they can walk to is worth way more through the whole of primary than this feeling of needing some perfect bubble to protect them at the start. A bigger school is better too for friendship options, funding, and being able to switch classes if it's ever needed, instead of being with the same 30 and being stuffed if there's no strong connections or if something doesn't work out. No way would I faff with that commute when there's a good option nearby. So nope, not justifiable or necessary for primary.

As an identical twin and a now a teacher their own classes and friends is so important. I really disliked the years me and my sister were together because everyone treats you as one person instead of two individuals who happen to look the same.

A bigger school is better for twins in my opinion. They get to be their one person and not “the twins”.
Mine were in different classes from Y3 upwards. There wouldn’t be that possibility in a single form entry.

Is it fully subscribed/overaubscribed?

I'm a firm believer that a local school is better, if both schools are pretty similar in what they offer.

What happens when one has an afterschool club and the other doesn't?

You're just driving and walking back and forth all the time.

Playdates, friendships, much more convenient to be local.

Obviously it has to be a good school to begin with, I wouldn't pick the worst school just because it was local, but from what you've said, you'd be happy with either school for different reasons.

The advantage of living close to friends shouldn't be underestimated. If your local school is good enough (which it sounds like it is) I would absolutely send my dc there.

Small schools have advantages and disadvantages, my dc went to one so I know. The chance of finding other dc they get on with is much better in a bigger car. When you combine that with the reduced friendship opportunities of being the only dc in the small school not living locally, I wonder how it would be socially for them?

Wow. @Brewtiful Thanks for sharing that. Would you mind if I asked from what age did you start not liking to be the same? My girls are extremely outgoing kids but also inseparable from each other. They are 3.5 and don’t like to be apart. They even insist to wear the same matching socks everyday.

Go to the nearest school. Their friends will stay local, eventually they will be able to walk on their own. You will make local friends and be a great support network to each other. Plus there will be a bigger variety of extra curricular activities etc to choose from

@Glittertwins I would also want them to be in a different class when they are in junior school. Do you find keeping them together in infant school helpful? The 3 form school has a blanket policy of splitting twins so I don’t have the option of keeping them together anyway. At the moment at the small preschool, they are inseparable and would be devastated to split. Was the transition ok for yours?

@JassyRadlett They are oversubscribed in some years but it’s more like having 31-32 applications so only slightly. It’s quite far and the village is small so they can’t always recruit enough kids close by.

Yes that’s my worry too. Because my husband commutes to London occasionally, and our town has a direct train that gets there really fast, we are not in a position to move to that rural village. I can’t see myself driving back and forth for play dates after school. Weekends once in a while maybe ok.