To feel annoyed I can never have a drink because I always have to collect Dh from work?

[stripeyrain]

I usually get home around 5 and Dh finishes around 9.
He isn’t allowed to park in his work car park as there is limited space and they are reserved for management.
It’s a sort of business park off a busy intersection so there’s no side roads or parking nearby.

Sometimes (not often) I really feel like coming home especially on a Friday and having a glass of wine while I make dinner but I always have to pick him up later so I can’t have a drink after work with colleagues on the odd occasion they do or with friend.
I was never a big drinker but I do resent having to drive later every night and just never being able to if I fancy ever.
He’s had this job for 6 years now and I miss sitting in the garden with a glass of wine after work, enjoying the last bit of sun of the day (in the summer) I just feel a bit restricted as his chauffeur when that should be my down time and this time of year I’d feel very unreasonable making him walk home in the dark and pouring rain just so I could have a couple of drinks after work but that doesn’t stop me from resenting that I never can.

How very controlling that he dictates your evenings.
Not normal, not healthy.
Wake up OP.

😆

I missed that update from the OP.

Tell him to get a moped or an ebike!
Why should you be his taxi service, it's ridiculous!

He’s redeemed himself slightly by being built like this 🤭🤭

Gosh how ridiculous! 30
minutes is nothing and would be lovely through the park come spring. It’s hardly going to be boiling hot in this country at that time of night.

He sounds controlling and you are enabling this. This is about you having some free time to make plans in the evening and not being beholden to him every bloody evening!

Put a stop to it!

Cycle in the summer, a couple of nights a week.

You can't be serious?

It's not about having a drink, it's about the fact that millions of people manage to get themselves to and from work every single day (including those on night shifts) without having their partner pick them up and drop them off. And to expect someone to do that every single day for 6 years so that you don't have to walk for half an hour is beyond fucking cheeky.

I'm surprised at people saying he could "occasionally" get a taxi. I have no idea why an able bodied adult cannot walk 30 minutes to work and back everyday. If it was -10 degrees or raining really hard then I could understand asking for or offering a lift but average weather conditions shouldn't be a reason to inconvenience your partner everyday. I notice you work, do chores and cook dinner so I'm wondering what contribution he makes.

Or walk, the fact his thighs rub probably means the need to exercise is greater.

Think we’re in agreement!

It would be an absolute deal breaker for me. 6 years of no social life because I had to drive a man who couldn't walk for 30 mins every now and then.
It's not just drinking - no meeting friends, theatre, cinema, anything.

Not really.

He could look like George Clooney and Brad Pitt's love child but I'd still get the ick from the fact he's basically a giant (rugby player sized) man child who can't walk anywhere in case he gets a rash.

Or after work you can drop the car off at his work and you can walk home

People really do have weird concepts about walking. Don’t get a a dog - that’s about. 2 hours of walking a day.
30 mins in the morning and evening is really nothing. Tiny school kids do this. It would be so good for his health.

I don't think its reasonable for you to be his taxi service every single working day when he's only half an hour from home. And I totally understand the need to wind down on a Friday. I can't have a wine either until my child has finished his club at 9pm (and his club on Weds, and his guitar lesson on Thurs - but I don't really want vino on those days - however sometimes it would be nice just to have a bath and wind down)
I'm also taxi service for that child every day - that was my decision because he needs to get a train to school and I chose that school. So I can't really complain about it. Actually distance from Friday club is also about 30 mins walk from home and the child is happy to walk back, but I choose to collect him, because he's a child.
Your DH is a grown man. He can find his own way home on a Friday night. Either by cab - its only a couple of miles - or by foot. I understand he's probably tired after a days work - aren't we all - but its hardly a million miles away. The chub rub excuse is outrageous. You don't get chub rub if you're wearing frigging trousers.

What does he do when you're out with friends or have gone away for a few days?

How many hours a week is he working if they start work at about the same time but he doesn’t finish until 9? Sounds to me as though he is cunningly missing all the boring home things that need doing after work, just coming home at a convenient time when the OP has tidied up, put a wash on, cooked supper , wiped down the kitchen……….

Friday night would be an Uber night! And a takeaway.

Tell him to get a grip. He sounds like a complete melt.

How does he manage daily life if walking anywhere gives him a "leg rash" ffs. And if he can't cope with getting wet in winter and hot in summer. Does he never leave the house?

So what if he gets hot and sweaty - yes that's the point of exercise! Shock horror, people get hot in summer! He's coming home anyway, he can jump straight in the shower.

I can understand why he might get a bit annoyed at not getting a lift on the offchance you might fancy a drink, but it's completely unfair for you to miss out on occasionally going out with your colleagues (and presumably your friends as well if you're expected to pick him up every single night?).

If you had young kids you wouldn't be able to leave them alone in the house at 9pm every night. Nearly all his colleagues must be in the same position as him, I highly doubt their partners/parents/whoever come and pick them up every single night! He needs to a) be a lot more grateful that you do most days and b) be prepared to lift share/pay for a taxi/walk/ride a bike/get a bus occasionally.

Send him this link and give him a tenner to get started.

www.bodyglide.co.uk/pages/mens-chafing

😂😂 you’re definitely right, —i am just very single—

cycling would be sexier than pestering his wife for lifts, honestly

I didn't say there was anything wrong with not wanting to cycle - I said some people make out that it's not possible rather than just saying they don't want to do it. I think people should just be honest and not make excuses!

I don't know why you're surprised and I've already said I've worked in urban and rural places and there have always been plenty of people cycling to and from work. I. know someone who currently regularly cycles from the Caerphilly to Cardiff - it's 12 miles and hilly, they avoid the motorway (as you can with most cycle routes) and they do it three times a week with no trouble, rain or shine.

This. It's a 30 minute walk! That is literally nothing, unless it's pouring with rain. Even when cold outside, that is nothing.

Sometimes (not often) I really feel like coming home especially on a Friday and having a glass of wine while I make dinner but I always have to pick him up later so I can’t have a drink after work with colleagues on the odd occasion they do or with friend.

This is from the OP.