Would you say this is wrong of care company

[Meandmrmen]

Support worker and service user had an argument due to a comment made by the support worker. The service users door had been broken by police due to a possible welfare concern. This had the not been fixed for a few days and the support worker said maybe it was because the hotel were “tried of it it. Which then in turn caused an argument. The support worker then choose not to tie up for the shift the next day. The service users lost money due to having things booked and having to pay for transport to a supermarket meanwhile despite being the instigator the support worker got full pay.

you seem to think you have the rights to this particular support worker who should only be paid for when shes working.

the truth is that the government is paying the care company for SOMEONE not just her to provide care. The company can decide who to send and should have sent someone else when that particular person phoned in sick.

that is what you need to ask, why was a replacement not sent. it could be there was a good reason like half the staff are down with the flu and nobody else was available sorry kind of thing. which at this time of year is understandable.

my mums carers are frequently late as they have to sometimes do extra thats unexpected eg help an elderly person who has a tummy upset and messed themselves and need washed and changed, or has fallen and likely broken a hip and cannot be left until the ambulance arrives. So it’s annoying but no precise time can be given. 15 minutes late isn’t bad.

are you off your meds because you seem very angry.

my ex was bipolar on meds and turned into a right nasty bastard when he was off them. if you cant stay on your meds you may also be like that. you wont feel it yourself but those who love (or even like) you will soon turn away from you if you are nasty to them. just take the meds. if you domt like them ask your gp for alternatives til you find the ones that work for you.

nobody should like their life upset or angry, bitter or full of hatred. we all deserve better.
if your life is shite make changes. we all can. some more than others if they have access to funds for spa days or relaxing massages or whatever one dreams of! but we can all make small changes.

the fact you had money to book tickets to something snd could afford a taxi are luxuries not all can afford.

you sound entitled and not very nice tbh. people wont eant to do you any favours if you’re horrible. you reap what you sow.

you cannot go on buses, why not? find a coping strategy and get on with it. it’s amazing what we can achieve if we just push a little out of our comfort zone. i’d start by having the carer sit behind me so i felt alone but shes still there is i need her. then maybe upstairs so shes further away but still there. then maybe not in the bus at all but meeting me at the stop i get off at. or whatever.

you can change if you want to. start trying. you only have one life so make the best of what youve got.

oh and stop phoning ambulances as people are dying while you are having a chinwag to the nice paramedics. they are not there to chat. which brings us back to the old lady with the broken hip holding up her carer who is now late for her next client. see how it affected you well your actions affect others. it’s all linked.

get back on your meds. domt give up. improve your life. be happy. you can do this. if you try. keep the faith.

Whether or not the support worker got paid by her employer is nothing to do with you.

Maybe she did speak out of turn but she’s a human being with thoughts and feelings too. It sounds as if it wasn’t the first time an incident like this had happened so she was just saying what she thought. Tactless perhaps, but maybe your reaction was so extreme that she just felt she couldn’t work with you the next day. And as I said, whether or not she was paid is not your business. However, I would have thought that the care company should have sent someone else.

Hot Tub, can't imagine having a bath with some random.

There are some horrible posts on this thread. I bet people wouldn’t respond like this if OP had physical health issues rather than MH. She’s been deemed to need a care package so her needs are clearly significant.
Would you blame a physically disabled person if the police knocked their door down after a neighbour raised concern?

The care company clearly feels that their employee’s reasons were valid and didn’t deserve not to be paid because they felt they couldn’t attend.

No worker deserves abuse at work OP.

Actually the care company the staff are late to nearly every shift as they aren’t given driving time from shifts that can be an hour plus away. Because I don’t kick off this regularly happens to me as I understand it’s not the support workers fault it’s the company’s so I regularly lose hours of care a week because of poor management and rotating so yes I am angry

The care company actually said we were both at fault not ha sh was an innocent victim.

@Meandmrmen have you posted before about your issues with support workers etc??

I'm well aware 'it's the real world' but thank you for the patronising comment. It's a shame so many people only want better for vulnerable people once their family members are affected.

the CW answered thoughtlessly.

'self indulgent nonsense'. ????

since when is wanting a door fixed so it can be secure & locked 'self indulgent nonsense' oh that's right, when an already vulnerable person ants ti feel safe & secure. 🙇🏻‍♀️

I didn't say a service user can treat a care worker can treat a CW however they want 🙄. But a CW shouldn't say things to wind up a service user. It's unfair & unkind.

The OP had repeatedly demonstrated absolutely no self awareness for how their actions affect other or have consequences. The sw told them. Maybe OP should have a look at what the underlying issue is.... their own attitude.

Being vulnerable is not a get out of jail free card to behave and talk to others whatever way they want. If you cause damage to be done to private property you have to be aware it takes time and money to fix and is upsetting for other people. If you complain people arent earning their wage and are wasting public money and resources without being so completely blind to how much they are wasting themselves then get off the internet.

Yep this is their polite way of saying they dont blame the care worker for walking out, they are trying to get you to realise that you were at fault and the care worker couldnt take it anymore

Did it make you feel big & clever to point this out to someone who needs a support worker?

We do not know the OP’s diagnoses or any additional background info. What we do know is that she has previously been on a section 3, is on 117 aftercare and requires support workers. If it was easy for the OP to navigate relationships and manage situations they feel difficult it would suggest that she wouldn’t need so much input.

It’s a shame that support workers are paid so poorly and are not adequately trained- but they shouldn’t have been causing conflict. Following a welfare check the SW should not have been blaming her in any shape or form, even if she is thinking that. Whether people on this thread think it is all the OP’s fault is irrelevant- the SW will be working from a care plan that hopefully includes being trauma informed.

If the OP needs challenging in her actions then it is not the SW’s job. That’s something the CMHT, psychiatrist or therapist needs to work on.

The care company are being polite so you don't kick off.
They are not referees allocating percentage of blame.
They are being nice to keep you ticking over as I am sure you have mentioned that you are not happy about this woman being paid (again, not your decision to make).
If you are not happy with the level of service this company provides you need to make a proper complaint, do you have friends/family that can help you?
For what its worth I worked as a CW for a while and it is a thankless job. No driving time, unhappy service users and minimum wage do not make for happy employees. Of course we are as kind and polite as possible but everyone has their limits and saying something you dont agree with is not the end of the world.

Exactly!! Well said.

Did the S.W call in advance to say they would not be coming in?
If they just didn't show up, that's not right, they need to phone to say they will be taking the day off.
This info is usually in your contracts.

Oh maybe if means what it means and both people were at fault.
stop trying to twist everything to make me look evil.

Nope I didnf know till the shift was due to start and I no one turned up so I asked

Presumably this sw is not your dedicated pa. If so their time frames are not likely flexible as they may have other commitments. So you putting them back two hours may not be possible if it means someone else is kept waiting or they have to fit another client in before coming to you. Likewise you need to allow for possible delays in making your plans if, for example, an earlier call overruns or there are issues with transport which causes them to run late.

I would expect the care agency to inform the OP that the worker isn’t coming. I would not expect a SW who is not on duty to contact clients- that opens a massive can of worms if they the client is then in crisis when they answer the phone. I would only expect the SW to do it directly if they are employed directly to the client using direct payments or similar.

I'm not trying to make you look evil, just telling the truth. They are placating you because you are complaining which is what everyone who deals with complaints does. I've had to listen to people complaining to me about things I have no control over so I placate them so they go away.

Really? A CW giving her opinion like this is not professional surely? I think the OP has the right co complain about that.

She didn’t have the right to then be rude to her though if that’s what happened.

Op contract is with the agency not the sw, so in absence of sw they should have offered an alternative, if it were possible and deemed safe to do so, or an explanation.

Seems people aren’t reading I had a six hour shift with this woman I pushed it back two hours she was still pad to sit at home she then had the audacity to give herself and extra 15 minutes pay and not turn up nor say sorry.

It’s 15mins, is it really worth this?

If the 2hrs before weren’t an issue for you, quibbling over a few minutes doesn’t seem worthwhile.

Are you sure that because there’s been a breakdown in the relationship and you evidently don’t like her, things that you’d be able to let go from someone else you can’t for her?