AIBU to find it incredibly frustrating that there are basically no resources in the UK for people like me?

[Maybeasd]

I’m genuinely starting to wonder whether I’m being unreasonable or whether this is just a massive blind spot in the UK.

I’m a woman, adult, functioning perfectly well in life for the most part, but I’m very cognitively able and have always been. I’ve been properly assessed and this a known entity (I was not born nor raised in the UK for context).

The issue is I’m finding that there are only pathways if you’re struggling but not if you’re just curious. I’m not only talking about the NHS, even privately I haven’t been able to find someone who hits the spot.

I’ve looked into:
ND assessments (very binary, very impairment-focused)
talk therapy - after years of it total waste of time and money.

People in the US suggested to find a neuropsychologist but they have eye-watering costs, mostly framed around brain injury or rehab

It’s either you’re ill or you’re fine, stop asking questions.

I’m not looking for validation, labels, or coping strategies.
I’m just trying to understand how my mind works, and it feels like that’s somehow illegitimate unless I’m suffering.

So… AIBU to find this incredibly annoying?

Absolutely. I can't think of anything worse than joining a club full of people who are obsessed with their own intelligence.

And that's because you're all different people. You will never find an explanation that says other than that.

Like I say, science can tell us that many people with ASD have sensory sensitivities and it has some idea why. It will never be able to tell us why they are different ones in each individual.

How the mind works is based upon theories, not scientific fact. You're intelligent ( I seen your other post were you said you are 'gifted'), you know your behaviours and you know your triggers. You're unlikely to get anything out of the assessment you are looking for. You also seem very thirsty for knowledge. I think you'd be better off learning about theories of mind independently and applying it yourself. I don't think an assessment from someone else would satisfy your curiosity.

I’m absolutely open to pointers of what platforms you use to hang out!

I’m on a waiting list for ASD assessment, so far I’ve been on it for 18 months, but I’ve started to ponder if I was wasting time and resources (and the spot for someone who would benefit more from it than me).

He has aphantasia, I have it and its like being in a black room in the dark with someone discribing something when someone asks you to picture anything.

OP, are you still fairly young? Because yes, that is all quite normal for people who are exceptionally clever and neurodivergent. Stop gazing at your reflection in the pool and go and read some books.

You are treating your brain set up as a destination when it's barely even a starting point. Ideas, art, creativity, maths, science, literature - that's where someone like you should be looking. That's where the unusual machinery becomes something other than self-contemplation. You read and think and grapple with things larger than yourself and then your mind has something to work on. The pattern recognition finds patterns that matter. The processing depth processes something actually worth processing.

The cleverness and the ND processing and the hyperphantasia or whatever else - those are just the equipment. You're standing there admiring your own toolkit and wondering why no one's built you a special workshop.You have to build your own!

I think I might have that? Have just shut my eyes and thought picture a blue elephant.. nothing. Can people actually close their eyes and conjure up
an elephant? Or like in yoga when the teacher gets you to listen to her voice and imagine a beautiful jungle etc.. do people actually see this ??

I think he CAN imagine things but he says that most of the time his brain doesn’t have any thot in the background, it’s just empty. Which is one of the reasons why he like manual work, he says once he understands what he has to do, he’s like an automaton that doesn’t have to think.

No I’m not! But I’ve come now from the other side, that just thinking about random things and coming up with random theories aren’t beneficial
to anyone but myself, which is OK, but I feel it can be used for something else.

I have my first session volunteering as a women “empowerment advocate” at least I’m now “paying back”.

I'm not sure about 'extraordinary' but definitely flaming insufferable.

I take that as a compliment ;)

OP I'm wondering how much of this is you searching for structure, for a box, for a label.

Also how much of it is unspent intellectual energy - do you feel adequately challenged in your day-to-day life, in your job? Does it interest you?

They can, but like a muscle, I believe that it can grow with use, with practice, but I'm not sure if it can grow like that if someone is totally with the ability.

With the jungle - I'm not sure what they would imagine really. If it's an amazon jungle, the forest floor is pretty dense and repetitive to our eyes.

It does sound like what you want is a thorough neuropsych evaluation that is regularly offered in the US. Unfortunately I think they cost about $10k. My nieces had theirs done for free because my sister works at a medical school and it was for research or training. Maybe you could look into that.

Absolutely brilliant post.

I'm a senior academic, and I run a pretty special research team, with really really clever postdocs. I work with a lot of very clever people. None of them is too serious about their brain capacity or "talents" or cleverness. They just get on writing field-changing books or running extraordinary research projects.

We get on and do stuff, rather than navel-gazing.

My advice to my PhD students is: always to take their work (research) seriously, but never themselves.

Googling 'coaching for the gifted' came up with loads of people who would happily take your money.

I’d say most neuropsychologists would prefer to apply their skills to something useful and helpful (to individuals and society) rather than sell them to someone who is simply curious, but not curious enough to want to study the subject themselves.

You sound incredibly neurodivergent op. And I say that as someone who is also neurodivergent, and who isn’t anything like you. Perhaps start in that direction.

Why wouldn’t your dd be offered an assessment on the Nhs

I suspect the OP actually thinks they are extremely special yet somehow lacks the ability to find out exactly how and why.

Because if there isn’t a problem why would the nhs be interested ? She was coping. She wasn’t ill. She didn’t have anything that needed fixing

How do you know youre gifted? @Maybeasd
Or how do professionals determine it?

Well, quite.

The traditional (and Mensa style) is different types of tests in different types of reasoning. Numerical, verbal, and spatial are the ones that come to
me. I took my last test 15+ years ago

MENSA is just a club for people who can pass those tests you've admitted can be passed with practice.

As I indicated earlier, Jimmy Savile was a long-time MENSA member.