AIBU - kids sleeping over at GP’s

[Chiavennasca]

My 2 boys, aged 4 & 8, love staying at their GP’s house (DH’s parents.) They stay over every Friday after school. Me and DH love the child free night and usually pick them up the next day about 1/2pm.

here’s my problem. I know they love being fun grandparents, and I get it but sometimes I do wish they would “adult” a bit more. They don’t put them to bed at all, there is no bed time, they get to lie in bed and watch tv till they fall asleep. This is usually after midnight. But both my boys are early risers so they’re still up at 8am the following morning. This means when I pick them up the rest of Saturday is spent with angry, overtired children. but GPs see it as a fun thing “no bed time at Gran and Papas woohoo!” For note - they are both retired and complete night owls themselves.

my other issue is food. Again, they are coming at the angle of being fun grandparents so every meal seems to be optional. Today, MIL said to me “we offered DC (8) x y and z for breakfast but he didn’t want any of it - so he ended up having a packet of wotsits!” I don’t give my DC a choice for breakfast they eat what’s set down in front of them. I know for a fact if she’d given my DC toast or cereal or whatever without question he’d have eaten it.

after we picked them up today, at 2pm, both DCs were hungry (both only had snacks all day - was told sandwiches were made but not eaten) and overtired and crabby. Honestly the rest of the day was a right off and now they’ve both had to go to bed super early on a Saturday night to catch up on sleep. I’m exhausted. For reference - both kids are genuinely super easy go with the flow kids.

I said to my DH that I think we need a break from sleepovers. They are our only outside childcare so they don’t sleepover anywhere else. Me and DH do love the time alone together on a Friday night / sat morning but honestly I don’t think it’s worth it for how rubbish the rest of our Saturday ends up being.

AIBU?

So anyway, your parents don't want to parent your kids every week, no matter how polite they're being about it, and that's why they're not interested in your parenting rules and are just letting them do what they want.

Your kids are suffering, but the main thing is you get to have a night every single weekend to pretend you're "child free".

So either stop dumping your kids one day a week with their grandparents and cut the sleep overs down to a normal amount, once a month maybe, and parent them yourselves, or stop complaining. Those are the choices.

Oh, and I just realised you're moaning about your dh's parents. The facts remain the same of course.

This response is irrelevant as no matter which grandparents she's dumping her kids with every weekend my previous response was correct. They've already parented. Now it's her turn.

Glad we've sorted that out.

OP wasn’t being rude. And I understand perfectly. It’s you who appears to struggle with comprehension. You’ve referred to the GP’s as her parents several times, despite it being clear AND being told by others, that it’s her DH’s parents. You can’t even grasp the basics of what OP has written. So the only one lacking any understanding is you.

You've been told by numerous people you’re consistently being unpleasant and rude.

You’re continually making things up about the OP, and likely projecting. You’re not adding anything constructive to this thread by constantly piping up with your diatribe.

Why don’t you take your lack of reading comprehension, obnoxious attitude and ‘Nah’s’, and pop off yourself.

An occasional late night isn't harmful but once every week isn't great especially if they don't lie in. They won't fully catch up on the sleep they need. I think you have to have a word. It sounds like they want to babysit without any of the hard work of actually parenting. If mine go to their grandparents they might have a slightly late night and watch lots of TV but they are in bed by 9pm and are well fed.

Well it's a good job I make my own then. I make all of my meals from scratch and avoid UPF as much as possible. I'm that crunchy I make my own bread and anything else that's possible. My grandson loves his pizza night with myself, his grandad and my youngest daughter. We then play games and have lovely story time before bed. Sorry I know you're not the poster who was getting at me for the pizza situation but there's so many reasons why GPS are involved in their Gc life.