To be confused as to why hiring a cleaner is seen as an indulgence?

[Gahr]

This is something that I see time and again on this site, and it is SO WEIRD. People seem to think that it is the height of luxury to have a housecleaner, and also seem to be strangely apologetic about it, offering disclaimers as to why they need one. Also, I've noticed that on threads when someone has a problem with their cleaning service, they will get several posts telling them to 'clean their own house'. Nobody would tell someone to 'service their own boiler' or 'fix their own toilet'! I don't understand it at all. I have a cleaner and I wouldn't be without her.

I am with you. At the moment it seems a “necessity” to take children on a holiday that costs thousands, to have hair and nails done every few months costing hundreds, have takeaway coffees five days a week with a bought sandwich etc etc. I did none of those things, I did work extra hours so I could pay a cleaner. I loved my job she loved hers!

If you csn afford one , and uour lufe style means you benefit from it then ofcourse you could have one...
However millions of kids/families are living in poverty, where choices of 'is it heating or food', or where parents go without food so the kids dont . That is the reality for many.
So yeah a cleaner, car valet, take away/meal out regularly ARE luxuries.
we are ok off, we live in our 1st home, a 2 up 2 down terrace which purchased 30yrs ago but I only know 1 person with a cleaner. Dad works away and mum works long hours with 3 kids to look after so she chooses to spend on a cleaner. So as pp said the fact all your friends have one means your outlook is probably a bit skewed .

And YBU to be confused about it - not everyone has as much spare money as you do .

We are retired, we have a lady who comes in once a week for about 3 hours. We also had a man to do odd jobs when we moved to the house with many small jobs to be done.
We needed work that we could not or preferred not to do, we employed someone. They were nor slaves or servants they were employed. Paid by Bank Transfer.

excellent point.

It is a luxury for me. I can't be the only one.

I don’t think it’s a luxury at all if all the adults in the house work full time.

It's probably £5 per hour more than minimum wage (which I earn).

I hate to break it to you but most common people...clean their own houses
I know it must come as a massive shock to you

You cannot be serious.
What a pompous and ridiculous question.
The answer by the way, is because you are perfectly capable of doing it yourself and most of us don’t have buckets of disposable income to pay others to do the basics for us. There is often an attitude not wanting to clean your own mess and therefore paying some skivvy to clean up after you is a much more preferable option. This isn’t an attitude to be proud of.
Of course there are lots of reasonable reasons why people have cleaners, from work and family and time constraints to simply needing a bit of help. Absolutely nothing wrong with that. However for most of us it’s a costly luxury we can’t afford.
It’s nothing like paying to have your boiler fixed - I can’t do that myself, you have to have a bunch of training and certification for a start.
As for the ‘it’s a wonderful wealth distribution tool’ - I just cannot. Hopefully you flick some crumbs from your table their way as well.

Yes, it would as I have done it before when I wasn’t working and was a SAHM. We have 5 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms, a study, kids playroom, tv room, living room and a large kitchen dining area. If I was to clean all the bathrooms, hoover the whole house, mops all the floors, dust and wipe down surfaces etc. that’s the time it used to take me and our cleaner takes a similar amount of time.

And it is not that I don’t clean or tidy at all. I clean the kitchen counters daily, sweep and mop the entrance hallway and kitchen/dining area daily as that gets the most traffic. I also often clean the bathroom and kitchen sink or put some toilet cleaner in the toilet bowls if the kids have made a mess. But I like my home to look nice at all times. The problems of being a perfectionist! Very high standards! 😂

18phr is nothing when u consider that they have to have insurance, insure their vehicles, some provide their own products, equipment, have to deal with their taxes pay relevant national insurance. When all that's paid it's a lot less an hour they actually make

If you had 2 parents working for minimum wage, it could be quite feasible they worked ft and commuted ....and didnt have money for a cleaner after essentials like rent/mortgage childcare, bills like water, heating, food etc,....in which case it would be a luxury?
I guess the difference is whether its an affordable luxury (for lots it is) or an unaffordable luxury.

Ive never really understood the point of a cleaner when you can do it yourself.
We could afford it, we live in oxford, both work full time and good household income, two kids under 6, but we still manage to clean the house ourselves, just seems like a waste of money to me. I also have ocd.

I have a cleaner. I’m an intelligent woman with 3dc and dh and I work full time. Of course it’s a luxury 😆 spending £52.80 (because I pay vat hence the odd amount) for a 2 hour clean every week is not something everyone can afford, like eating out or going to the theatre… these things are luxuries. My friend doesn’t have a cleaner but eats out with her dh twice a week - again, a luxury, but a different one.

I’m baffled there are people who don’t see that. Using a different example; getting your car through its MOT = not a luxury, getting it valeted = luxury. Getting your boiler serviced by an actual gas engineer = not a luxury (you cannot do that yourself, unless you’re qualified and choosing to get someone else to do it), getting someone to clean you’re radiators = luxury. Does that help?

Alternate view, I don’t see the point of spending my spare time cleaning when I’d rather be spending that time with my dc.

I get a little bit of disability and use some of it for a cleaner once a week. I used to be a live in care assistant so it feels a bit weird and uncomfortable but I don’t feel guilty. Is it a luxury ? Well yes, in my working class circle it is and more and more people are feeling the squeeze. But your also correct in saying it’s about choices, for example, someone who treats themselves to coffee every morning could pay a cleaner for an hour instead, or that lunch you go for on a Saturday with a friend, or drinks after work on a Friday night. My cleaner is £15 an hour by the way.

I mean... people struggle to pay basic bills and put food on the table for their family even with 2 jobs.

You Still can't see how having a cleaner may be seen as luxury?

For example, a cleaner may not afford a cleaner ... because of small wages.
I work in health and social care and the amount of children & families i see on my cases struggling with financial hardship puts a different perspective on value of things.

Do you think that your cleaner has a cleaner OP, if it’s a totally normal everyday thing that ‘everyone’ has?

I agree with you but my husabnd wouldnt let us have any of these basic services. I waswokign three different jobs and doing a phd and he was working a stressful full-time job and I asked for a cleaner but he refused. I ended up in psychosis from stress and I lost everything. his approach to money was insane

I agree totally. its really not a lot of money compared to other thigns people spend on

my huabsn and I both worked full-time and I was also doing a phd. I knew it was all getting too much for me. I wish I had insisted hard on having a cleaner becasue my husband refused for us to have any services at all and I was under such strain I went into psychosis and lost everythign. every single thing id worked for and I came from a background of poverty and trauma.

Oh wow, blissful ignorance.

I need the laughing emoji!
So you don’t outsource anything? You do EVERYTHING without exception “yourself” @Stephybris62

You make everything from scratch for example?

The poster you quoted says they dont have a cleaner, not that they dont outsource anything?

I also dont have a cleaner, although we could probably afford it. DH is in the middle of decorating a spare bedroom , some people might pay someone to do that, I dont think its that strange to prefer not to pay for (some) things you can do yourself.

In our town there are people on local Facebook offering, or looking for all sorts of services that others would do themselves - handy man, putting together flat packs, kitchen reorganising, wardrobe reorganising, wrapping christmas presents, sewing name tags or cub badges, pushchair valeting as well as cleaning, ironing, gardening, dog walking, decorating etc
Some people will choose to pay for them, some won't.(and some won't be able to afford any of it) 🤷‍♀️