Old Fashioned Table Manners

[Unorganisedchaos2]

Probably more "am I being an old fashioned old grump ...."

Me, DD7 and DH live together, only in the last two years had space for a dining room table. We don't eat out much as a family but do on holidays / weekends away. DD's table manners weren't great for a while but I've been really trying to get them in check, she now eats pretty well when we go out, will order her own food and sit at the table without relying on a tablet too much 😕

We are all home for dinner time and I would like to have the same rules and have been asking DD to help set the table, sit nicely through dinner, have a chat about the day and ask before she can leave the table. A few younger family members have commented that is really old fashioned now, especially asking to leave the table?

Also DH, who seems to take no pleasure in siting together for a meal just wants to eat his food quickly, go out for a cigarette then get on with his evening.

Is it unreasonable to ask everyone to sit together for 20 minutes to eat and have a chat and use some manners, or am I out of touch?

The one I hated was 'no elbows on the table'. Which was logistically difficult when your under 4ft tall. I was always taught to ask to please leave the table when I was finished and take my plate and wash it.

So yeah I think that's a good habit to get into.

Im not sure if it needs to be worded like that, but I do think it’s normal to sit and chat until everyone’s finished eating. If you’re desperate to leave before that surely you should excuse yourself in some way not just get up and walk off? That applies whether you’re fifteen or fifty.

Absolutely this.

Your daughter will have confidence to sit and have dinner with anyone from all sorts of backgrounds, she will know how to converse, use correct cutlery and never worry or embarrass herself about how to behave at the table. She may well have a career which involves dining with people she doesn't know well, because she has good table manners she won't make any faux pas or embarrass herself.

Do your rude relations just get up and leave the table before everyone has finished and generally behave like pigs?