To go LC with PILs because FIL voted for Trump?

[EachotherAndAnother]

I've been married for 18 years, two primary-aged DC. My ILs are American. They live about 20 mins drive from us (in the UK). For most of my marriage we've gotten along fine-ish, although I've often felt like they cross a lot of boundaries and have learned to be judicious about how much I open up to them. But they're hospitable and generous - have helped us financially when buying our house, help with the DC in the holidays etc.
They've occasionally made comments that have rubbed me the wrong way, but I've dismissed them as typical boomer nonsense - e.g. the idea that poor people are usually poor because they've make bad choices. They also cautioned their other son (DH's brother), who was planning to (and did) marry a Black woman, that any time a "minority" has married into the family it's ended up causing problems and division. But by and large I keep my conversations with them superficial and manage to rub along ok. The DC adore them.
But - I recently found out that FIL voted for Trump. Any time a controversial issue has come up regarding politics in the US, the conversation gets shut down very quickly, but I had my suspicions and these are now confirmed. And maybe it's ridiculous but I just can't stomach being around them anymore - I'm disgusted that he felt a man like that deserved to be elevated to the role of president and I'm furious about the havoc that is unleashing in the States and elsewhere. I don't want my daughter (in particular, but also not my son) spending time with them, I just feel like they're completely different people from me, with completely different values.
They are oblivious to how I feel and would feel blindsided if I brought it up. We would definitely not be able to have a productive conversation about it. So AIBU to just quietly stop accepting invitations, offers of help etc and gradually distance my family from theirs, or is that a massive overreaction?

I've dismissed them as typical boomer nonsense

I stopped reading when I reached the ageist comment.

Is it though?

or is it pandering to everyone, treating all opinions are worthwhile ?

sometimes the courage of conviction is needed - if I think you are a committed racist I will turn my back on you.

prominent Democrats are in the Epstein too more than trump - Just look at all the Bill Clinton photos of them together, they were good friends. Also Biden in his 4 year presidency could’ve released the files and didn’t, to protect his own party. Epstein involves both parties. At the
top republican/democrat doesn’t matter, it’s all about extreme wealth and the trappings that brings.

Trumps a complete bellend, but he got voted in as POTUS twice apparently many peoole who voted for him in the last election did so because they believed they would be financially enter off then him
Ultimately people have the right to vote for whoever they want going no contact with them becsusd yoy fint agree with them is childish.

And that is fine, but wasn't OP's question, or the point being made by the poster whom I quoted.

So, to be fair, are a lot of younger people. Trump got a huge amount of votes from younger Americans, and those of other ethnicities 🤷‍♀️

Millions of good people may have been misled and whilst infuriating, they don't deserve to be ostracised. However, anyone who STILL now supports the man doesn't deserve the same understanding. It is entirely honourable to take a moral stance in life.

For many, voting Republican (and holding their noses about Trump) is talking the moral stance, given the current state of the Democratic party. There is no third option in the US.

Silly . You don’t have to agree with them but it’s your husbands family fgs .

Well I’m currently hiding upstairs from FIL who is visiting for the day after he declared happily that he is voting reform and that he doesn’t care that if they were in charge we’d potentially lose our benefits and SEND education funding and NHS health care for our disabled children. So I have sympathy OP.

Yanbu but how will you pay back the tainted money to them?

Hard to see how you could live in a trump voter funded house but not go for tea with them once a month

I expect she only has principles when she’s not out of pocket

I'm surprised you've gone this long without reducing contact with them, tbh.

I'm LC with mine because of their racism and xenophobia.

You’re comfortable accepting their financial support, but you’re considering going low contact over their differing opinions, even though they haven’t treated you badly. That feels like a contradiction and is extremely fickle

You'd be very foolish to live your life like this, cutting off people you disagree with.

The key to a cohesive society is tolerance and communication.

Stereotyping groups into woke and boomer plays into the hands of the powerful and the wealthy who don't want the majority of society to look their way and realise that they are issue, hoarding both money and power.

Be a role model, be fair and judicious and accepting that maybe not all Trump voters are aligned with everything he does and says. You'll have far more impact in a far more beneficial way if you take the higher road.

There's a reason conversations around politics are said to be avoided, so you don't fall out with people you otherwise generally get along with :). More importantly though, these are your husband's parents. This is not a reason to cause that kind of family rupture, unless he decides the situation is untenable?

Conversations about politics often tell you who people really are and what they stand for. I don't think there is any reason why they should be avoided.

And yes, these are her husband's parents. I usually think that people are far too quick to go LC or NC with family members. But where do you draw the line? Would you really turn a blind eye to someone who actively supports a fascist leader?

You have a point. I guess I would see a difference between an evangelical Trump supporter, who used instances of contact to push his agenda, and someone who voted for what they saw as the better option out of two parties and preferred not to discuss their political leanings?

Peoples opinions and political beliefs are shaped by life experience. There is often a generational gap.

Trump voting- whatever you believe, he got voted in so most of a country voted for him. Are you so arrogant (political beliefs aside) that you believe you are superior, and in every way so much more moral than more than 50% of the American population to the extent that you should not even associate with them? Because that’s what you’re saying.

I might go LC for the racist comment about marrying a minority as that’s awful. But that doesn’t see to have bothered you as much - strangely. So, YABU.

I absolutely judge anyone who voted in Trump for the second time, and I wouldn't want to associate with any of them.

There couldn't have been any doubt at that point about who he was and what he stood for.

You can associate with whoever you like. Some of us have basic standards.

It was clear as to what Trump was prior to the election. Perhaps I could just about forgive someone for voting them in if they realised now what they had done and deeply regretted it. But it doesn't sound like that's the case.

I have family who voted for Trump politics is just not discussed with them

family friends who you would never ever think are Trump supporters again politics not up for discussion or subject avoided

people voted for him for different reasons and some would always vote Republican

I do not agree with their reasoning and some are totally lost to all the conspiracy nonsense, it’s always in the background in American politics a fear of communism style politics impacting policies, has been around for years but just exploded under Trump

my aunt and uncle are good kind people just their politics (and wanting to protect their hard earned money) is off in my view

are you even based in the US though?
People are polarised on him over there but ultimately he gets support. In any room in the UK he is almost universally hated.

You must understand. Politics is based on lived experience. In the UK there is a widely accepted anti trump agenda to the extent that he is suing the BBC.

Over in the US, Fox News and other outlets are pro trump a lot of the news outlets are.

news influences and effects who people vote for.

Honestly, I used to feel as strongly about people who voted Tory. Part of maturity is realising people have had different exposures and those exposures impact belief.

Surely it’s better to be tolerant, have intellectual debate and challenge thinking? Especially if someone’s only news source is Fox News.

I don’t value cutting off people with different ethnicities, religions or, importantly BELIEF. I think that is decisive and not beneficial to society.

I live in a very multicultural town, with many people who have relatives and friends in Iran. Most of whom, mainly amongst the older people, are totally against the protests. Surprised me, but that seems to be the reality.

No, I'm not based in the US, but I have close friends who are. They are beside themselves and believe that Trump is a fascist. And all of the evidence seems to back them up.

And yes, there is support for Trump in the US. So what? There were Germans that voted for the Nazis. Does that mean that we should have "tolerated" Hitler?

I honestly don't know why anyone is so intent on minimising what is going on in the US right now. What will it take to make them realise that this isn't simply about a difference of opinions?