To feel bad for Helen Flanagan here?

[mumofoneAloneandwell]

https://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/helen-flanagan-furiously-hits-out-36599678.amp

she’s being made to sell their home and work, taking jobs she wouldn’t normally, and being away from her kids?

I know some of you are gonna be like ‘poor little rich girl’ 😂😂😂 but honestly, what kind of man is this?? Feel for her a little (from my own, much lower, tax bracket)

I agree @mumofoneAloneandwell being a SAHM is a job, in fact it's multiple jobs. Re, the women who go to paid employment as well, many of these will outsource to childminders, nannies, cleaners, laundry services, etc. The SAHM will do all the work these people do herself.

Working mums - especially full time ones - do NOT do a full time job- and 'everything else as well' (that a SAHM does.) They just don't.

And I say this as someone who has been a SAHM, a part time working mum, and a full time working mum.

SAHM is a little bit of a privilege but it's not an easy life for everyone, and it IS a job. (Indeed, multiple jobs as I said.) Frankly it's demeaning and insulting to say 'it's not a job.'

he wants her to move to a smalller home and he stops paying maintenance 😬😬

She was a child actress, so often accountants will advise on how to invest money.
Anyway, she's got a part in a play, so that could well lead to other work.

She wasn’t married. She was very unwise to be a sahm unmarried.
Living in a house he solely owns she has less rights than a lodger. She’s there due to his goodwill, he could ask her to leave tonight. Calling him a dickhead in press isn’t best move when you are relying on goodwill.
He of course is required to financially support his children but he had no legal responsibility to an ex girlfriend.
Different if they were married. Presumably he didn’t want to yet she had 3 children in full knowledge of her legal status. She’d have been better working ft and buying her own home.

I can't imagine a man who wouldn't want to pay to support his children, even if the mum went out to work. So she gets more acting jobs, fine, but they're still his children. It seems strange.

Reading the report, it says he’s offered to buy her a 4 bedroom house in the same area, but she wants to stay in the 6 bedroom one…no I don’t feel sorry for her, would love someone to buy me a 4 bed house 😂 plus he’s paid for where she’s living and all bills, maintenance etc for almost four years

Unfortunately the children have nothing to do with the reason why a father won't pay maintenance.

It's because the maintenance gets paid to the mother & these fathers who won't pay maintenance just can't stand the thought of the ex having their money, forgetting that the money is spent on providing for the children.

So not paying maintenance is a weapon used to threaten & hurt the resident parent except the real victims are the children.

But she can't afford to be a SAHM. It is shit, but it's equally shit for anyone in her position. After a divorce or separation most mum's have to go to work. She's no different to anyone else.

I hope she has grown up since her time on I am a celeb as she seemed really narcissistic when she was on that !

Not a job that, you know, pays money. Like you need for you monthly mortgage payment or rent

I don't know the ins and outs of it all but Helen didn't marry Scott. He has zero obligations to support Helen; his only obligation is to his children. If the house she's been living in, is owned by Scott (and not Helen), then he's within his rights to ask her to move out. If the property is jointly owned, and he's currently footing the bills because Helen can't, then the house needs to be sold, if she can't buy him out. Unfortunately, this isn't any different to a normal run of the mill couple, who've separated.

Yes, she will need to find another property suitable for herself and the three children to live in. Yes, she will need to work to pay her bills. Hopefully Scott is paying Helen child support (which presumably will be substantial given he's a footballer, even if it's a lower league).

Helen is an actor, which doesn't give a person job security. Finances can be unpredictable. Actors do have to take 'normal work' to support themselves. Bills don't pay themselves, and she can't expect Scott to financially support her.

I don’t understand why you think she should be a kept woman by her ex-boyfriend?
Where’s the independence and integrity of paying your own way?

I feel that it’s definitely not wrong for a mum to work and have kids, plenty do and do it well! - but they should want to, not be forced into it

I don’t think that it should be ‘oh well your marriage failed, off to work you go’

also, how many women are staying in shite marrriages because they know they won’t get the support they need to be the mum they want otherwise?!

There is probably a schedule 1 Children’s Act claim being negotiated. It sounds like he’s currently paying for housing the children and has offered to buy her a property as part of a settlement so she can house them but this will result in less ongoing maintenance.
She went to private school so perhaps her parents can assist if he’s only willing to fund a 4 bed and she wants to stay in a 6 bed. 4 bed is a bedroom per child.
Whilst he’s obviously been higher earning in past he’s not a particularly high earner now.
She’s mad to refuse a house in her name. If she stays as his guest in the 6 bed house one day when children are adults she’ll need to move out and will be in her 50s starting from scratch on housing ladder.
The comment about her adding value to his house. Don’t add value to someone else’s property. In limited circumstances you can try and claim a beneficial interest but it’s fraught with difficulty and expensive legally.

You are missing point she wasn’t married Op.
Total chalk and cheese between legal positions.

But child rearing, and all that comes with it is a full time job - it’s a job that lots of women do in addition to working, but still a job nonetheless 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Agree that this is key here

of course, plenty of women get screwed when they married the guy also

What’s the point in saying it’s a job in the context of someone who needs to earn money?

how do parents earn money if they already have a job?

Oo I didn’t watch it - she used to have this kind of spoiled school girl act, she didn’t still have it??

I don’t get why you think he should fund Helen’s lifestyle. Yes he wants to sell the house but he’s said he’d pay for a smaller one so not like he’s cutting all financial support & as a follower of his on social media he has his children regularly too, in fact I read somewhere the oldest actually wants to live with her dad.

many other single mums don’t get the luxury of having a house and all experiences covered by their children’s dad so why should he any different.

Agree but I think that Scott should support her as the mother of his kids 😬😬😬

I understood it as he was offering to buy her a house but then stop maintenance

Not That 2:22 play??

If I were her I'd take up the offer to buy her a house! There are worse ways to emerge from a relationship where you had multiple children, gave up work and didn't have the wit to make marriage a condition of all this. A four bed fully paid off property is nothing to sniff at.

I don't know the whole background but they are not doing 50/50 they live at opposite ends of the country. He IMO should pay enough support for the kids to have a similar life style to what they would have had if their parents had remained together. As far as she is concerned, it's not like she can go and work in M&S, I hope she gets some decent opportunities, tricky working long hours with 3 kids hope she has good support too.