To not buy a £1,000 present for DH birthday?

[DandyReader]

Usually, dh and I buy each other an experience for each other's birthdays. But this year, DH is turning 30. He said he'd prefer if I get him a gift. Fair enough, he'd like something to keep.

He has been banging on about getting a 'nice watch' for years. He could afford to buy one himself but knows it's a splurge. He has shown me multiple watches around the £1,000 mark and keeps dropping hints how he really wants a nice watch but can't justify that for himself. He hasn't explicitly asked, but I think he's hoping.

I could easily buy one for him, but I don't want to. I have savings targets to meet and don't want to start a precedent of spending silly money on gifts. AIBU?

I don't think it does set a prescedent. MIL died last year. This is relevant because everything was willed to be three ways, except SILs decided they were having all her jewellery. DH, not wanting to rock the boat (and I felt it wasn't my place) didn't say anything. They left behind all the 'worthless junk.'
I would have liked something to be passed on to our DD. The only piece left after they'd cleared everything was a snapped ring with a stone missing, found a couple of months later whilst DH was getting the house ready to sell.
On a significant anniversary DH gave me a beautiful watch (worth significantly more than your DH is hinting at) and his DM's ring (he'd had it repaired, the small side stone replaced and cleaned).
I have a life limiting condition. He wanted me to have the gifts but also me to have them to pass on one day.
It turns out the ring is quite valuable. DH had no idea, he just wanted something to pass on after I'd said it. Maybe your DH has an eye on it being a bit of an heirloom. Funnily enough both DS have now expressed an interest in it...

Just because you have the money doesn't mean you are obligated to spend it.

I wouldn't personally spend £1000 on a birthday present for my DH, nor would I want him to spend that much on mine either!

Have a look at Hagley West watches, they are really beautiful and very affordable.

#loveyourjourney

I have savings targets to meet

What does this mean? You've set yourself a target gif how much you have decided to save?

If you can easily afford it then I probably would. You’re not setting a precedent if it’s for a big birthday are you? Surely the next time will be in ten years.

But like another poster said, desirable watch brands like Omega, Rolex, Tag etc will be way more than 1k.

30 isn't much of a milestone birthday. Your money, your choice and if I was in your position with your savings target in mind I too wouldn't buy it. Maybe get something else around the £500 mark? In your husband's shoes, I would just ask directly. Life's too short for hinting (in this context).

YANBU. Personally, I think it's daft to spend that much on a watch ( but I know lots of people think differently). Nobody even NEEDS a watch nowadays!

Is it because you are the main earner? Or the bigger, etc...more info needed here

Is 30 a land mark birthday?

This, exactly

Unless there's a drip feed and it's equivalent to 3 months wages or something and you can't afford your. Food shop

My husband never bought me things j needed

Yes, because I know people (as mentioned, my brother) who like these kind of things.

A good watch is a potential investment, as well as something he will keep for life, but at £1,000 you are probably not in "good watch" territory, tbh.
However, if it's what he wants....
And a generous gift has to be better than "savings targets", for sure!

Yab, unreasonable, tight, and gross.

What’s the savings target for if it’s something like a mortgage then absolutely, if you already have many thousands in the bank and this is a month off target then get it… it very much depends on your personal circumstances.

Do you have an engagement ring and wedding ring? Who paid for them, and what did they cost?

I think £1000 is a lot to pay for a single item unless you are living very comfortably. When you say DP, are you married, is it a very long term relationship as this would also make a difference.

You say you have saving targets and I think that’s fair enough. If I was saving for a house or something in particular and a £1k unnecessary outlay would not be a priority for me.

Is he generous to you?

If he can't afford to spend £1k on a watch for himelf, what will he buy you for a specil birthday gift.

I think watches are tricky. A £1000 watch will never appreciate. If that's your budget, I'd keep an eye out at auction.

Nearly 25 years ago I paid about £450 for a Maurice Lacroix watch. A similar one new would now be about £1250+. However, the second hand value is about £150. Go figure.

It says in the OP he could afford to buy it for himself

I spent 1k on my ex for his 30th (we all went to Disney Paris). He spent more as we went to the Caribbean for mine. I don’t think 1k is extortionate for a partners milestone bday. But if you think it is then maybe give him a budget, then he can decide whether to choose a cheaper watch or something different.

We celebrate all the 0 birthdays as big ones.

I’d buy him the watch. Savings can be picked up again next month, you know what he wants, I’d far rather know what someone wants and buy that rather than just stabbing around in the dark for ‘experiences’ that you’ll end up doing for the sake of it but he’ll probably be thinking ‘I’d rather have had the watch.’
my dh never asks for anything as he just buys himself what he wants (including expensive watches) so I like it on the very rare occasion when he tells me something he’d like!

My dh and I have both said we’d buy each other big gifts for our 40th’s. He’s already pointed out watches he would like. I’m saving and will ask family members to give money towards (if they ask what to buy him).
He’s already suggested going half with me on one particular expensive watch.

I think if you can afford it and it’s something he will use and keep then I would go for it. I understand he wants something sentimental for a big birthday.

Could you suggest giving a chunk of money towards it?

😂😂😂

Check his browser history before you spend £1,000 on him 😂

Also, I wouldn’t if I were you. Been there, done that. I see multiple threads on here about how the man never gets good gifts or even any gifts for their wife. Imagine how upset you would be if he didn’t reciprocate. I’m being extra careful with my money from now on. Most men don’t deserve it.