To not buy a £1,000 present for DH birthday?

[DandyReader]

Usually, dh and I buy each other an experience for each other's birthdays. But this year, DH is turning 30. He said he'd prefer if I get him a gift. Fair enough, he'd like something to keep.

He has been banging on about getting a 'nice watch' for years. He could afford to buy one himself but knows it's a splurge. He has shown me multiple watches around the £1,000 mark and keeps dropping hints how he really wants a nice watch but can't justify that for himself. He hasn't explicitly asked, but I think he's hoping.

I could easily buy one for him, but I don't want to. I have savings targets to meet and don't want to start a precedent of spending silly money on gifts. AIBU?

Oh you're quite right, apologies.

Yeah that's hypocritical, £15k on a one off holiday is way more extravagant than £1k on a watch he might have for life and wear every day!

Hahah this was my first thought to be honest.

Absolutely no way would I spend that much on a gift for DH, he’s taking the piss!

Snob alert 🚨

This feels highly dependent on income!

You can get a decent watch for far less than £100 never mind £1000.🙄

If it was my OH, I had the money, and I knew he really wanted an expensive watch that'll probably last him decades...I would but it for him.
You are only 30 once.

If we were both comfortably off I’m not sure I’d find a partner prioritising ‘savings targets’ over a generous but not stupidly expensive gift very attractive. Meanness is a massive turn-off.

I’m on team buy him the watch.

I had a big birthday last year and wanted a very expensive watch. I actually had an inheritance to put towards it and could have bought it myself by making up the money but it felt more special to have it as my birthday gift. So DH offered to buy it for me ( the inheritance was also contributed).

Now when I look at my shiny wrist I’m reminded of two of the people I love best.

I don't know one watch from another and don't even own one but I do know that some people love them. My DB and SIL argue over it as he wants an expensive one.

I'm surprised he's showing you many different watches. It implies that he doesn't really "love" any of them if he's not bothered which one it is. Does he just want it for status/looks, rather than actually being a watch enthusiast?

Also, a pp has been called snobby for saying you can't get a "nice" one for £1000 but would need to spend £2.5k+. I think that is actually true and not a snobby perspective. As I said, I don't even have a watch so I am no watch snob.

Depends what you mean by ‘decent’. Sure, you can get one that works but that’s not always why people want stuff.

Some watches hold their value and even appreciate, making them a good investment. But for that you’re looking at the £5k mark.

A £1k watch is mid range.

30 is not a milestone birthday

He can buy it h8mself. I would not be spending £1k on a present

... tight af.

I agree.
My husband bought me a Raymond Weil watch around 30 years ago. It's the only watch I own, still looks and performs brilliantly, and a good watch could possibly be handed down one day to a family member.

Exactly this.

Stop being greedy. If you love him, can afford it and it’s not going to decimate your savings but him this for his milestone birthday.

Imagine if your DH was saying the same thing - as if you’re not worth it.

Poor bloke.

So you don't know anything about watches but you know that you have to spend £2.5k to get a nice one.
Ok.

I’d buy a Christopher Ward for that, but their marketing blurb says they mark up 300%. As opposed to 500% for the expensive brands.

I would treat him - you have the money and he'll be absolutely thrilled. £1000 is actually at the moderate end of the scale for quality watches.

I'm as tight af but not as careful as my DH.

If he wants it, he can get it.

But hint dropping & precedents are a slippery slope.

A decent watch is one that keeps good timing....an investment watch is something else.
My son bought my mum a Timex watch one Christmas long ago...she treasured it and wore it till the day she died...now that was a decent watch.

I would match his gift giving energy. If he always remembers significant dates and buys you nice things without bragging about it for 3 months then buy the man his watch. If he is the other sort of partner then you are right to hesitate.

What a tight wad. ‘You’ve got spending targets’ 😂 Don’t you like him? My husband’s 40th was 5 years ago and I spent over £1k on a refurbished iPad/gig tickets and a smaller gift. That’s because I’m rather keen on him.

Why? It’s very controlling.

You have the money? It would give him pleasure and he’d wear it every day?

Why wouldn’t you buy it for him?

What watch is it?