HH income of £250k but we don’t feel rich?

[Bdrgvlugcbu]

Not a brag in the slightest! And wouldn’t discuss this non-anonymously.

DH earns just over £250k per year. Has fallen into the role really and is based on natural ability/talent as oppose to lots of hard work and training. He works very long hours though. I’m a SAHM to 3 young children.

Take home is approx £12k per month.

School fees: £3,000 per month
Mortgage, car and bills: £3500 per month
Personal savings £2000 per month
Kids savings: £450 per month
DH and I take: £500 personal money each per month
Leaves us with £2,000 per month for general spending, food shopping, days out, holidays, children’s clothes…

We don’t really go without, but we don’t feel “well off” by any means. Where are we going wrong?!

Good grief you have less in your pension now than I do … 30 years older than you

you really have lost the plot OP

yiu are rich
yiu. Can easily afford everything you need without worry
you have good savings and a great safety net

you are not happy
you are not satisfied

put some music on
i suggest Ralph mcTell and had a good sing and dance to cheer yourself up

Why then do you think you're hard done by?

You earn lots, have a ice 4 bedroom house, have kids in independent schools, have cars, savings, lots of spending money etc

WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?

This is nonsense. Cleaner/dog walker/someone to mow the lawn and chop weeds back maybe, but fully pay rolled staff are VERY expensive. And most people earning this money are lawyers/in tech/finance and we live in 3/4 bed semis in zone 4/5/6! No room for a full staff.

Assuming this is real….You don’t feel rich because you are no doubt surrounded by extremely wealthy people who will make your relative wealth seem paltry. It’s why the top 1% don’t feel rich: they tend to compare themselves to the top 0.1%.

Our HH income is way less but I feel rich as I don’t have to worry about paying bills, or providing basic essentials for my (state educated) kids. Given that I grew up with the threat of eviction and bailiffs, it feels like wealth.

You have lots of money left over each month. When you can afford £2k in savings per month, and holidays, and personal money - you are so much better off than most people. FFS, the average take home must be about £2.5k per month.
Just count your blessings.

Yes I don’t think it’s possible to do private education and have the expensive house and cars on this salary. It’s one or the other. I think this is a big part of it.

.... But you clearly can... Because you're doing it...

why do you not work then to improve your household income?
you can’t afford 3x private secondary with those expenses.

You save every month what I earn every month.

You do. You have £2k personal savings each month. That's my entire income.

This is also nonsense. I earn a fraction of that and never do a camping holiday.

Maybe you didn’t intend your OP as a wind up and perhaps it’s because you mix at the school gate with people who are high earners and therefore your perspective is skewed, but really, you are so far removed from the average that it really does irritate. You don’t need to spend what you are spending and you would be better putting money into a pension if you haven’t got one.

You have something in common with the 7% of the population who send their children to private school and maybe some of those are even more well off than you, but you’re posting on a forum that’s more likely to appeal to the 93% who don’t send their children to private school. Of course there are some of the 7% are on here, but I think most will find it difficult to find some sympathy for you, especially when you can very easily be altered to give you savings, as well as a decent quality of life.

I don't believe it either.😂

Also, when I see folks complaining about all of these situations, I think 'why are you sending your kids to private school, if you're then saying you don't have money?' State school is absolutely great for most kids. There you are, £3k more a month. See, I sorted it for you.

Well you’ve chosen education then- that’s your perceived compromise and you should be very happy that you are rich enough to do this and still have money left for other things.

I can’t be bothered to read the thread, but you just need to change your mindset and recognise you are rich and stop being such a dick. 2k of savings in addition to the 2k personal spending on top of everything else.

Our household take home is quite a lot higher than yours, and right now don’t feel rich cos we have fuck off costs (none relating to private school) so actually have some debts to pay off. But I’m not crying to myself or asking others to pity me. FFS. Get real.

DH has been self employed for a very long time and didn’t pay into a pension. He earned approx £180k per year for 15 years. He now has a job paying £250k and has only been paying into a pension for 2 years.
We have less than £120k in pensions between us. We are late 30s.

if your DH has had those sort of earnings for 15-20 years and you needed to buy a car on finance you have money management issues. Where did all the £180k’s go? Sounds like you frittered it away on a lifestyle and now with three kids (more than the average family size) and large outgoings / savings you don’t have cash for as many treats. Because you didn’t think of the future when your DH earned 180k a year.

Nevermind17 maybe she doesn’t like cleaning. Being a sahm does not mean you you have to resign yourself to drudgery.

Who wants to clean? If she can’t afford a cleaner with that household income then there really is a problem.

Them lefty’s on MN know nothing about the struggles of the aspirational!

You're saving £2k a month, saving £450 for the children, spending £1k between you on personal spending and you're complaining because you only have £2k a month left for general spending.

I've got just under £2k a month coming in, in total. I have no savings.

At the moment I have £109 to last until I get paid on the 28th. That's got to cover two weeks worth of household food, a tank of petrol and any other necessary spending.

Sorry for not feeling any sympathy for you.

£2k a month savings

Fuck right off

Seriously just fuck off

He earned £180,000 a year and never put money into any kind of pension scheme?

And now he's still not got the hint and isn't putting in extra?

That £2000 in savings should go into his pension...

How are you both so financially illiterate yet earning 9-10 times the amount most people do...

Your DH could be salary sacrificing £60k a year into a pension and not paying any Tax and NI on it. Thats a better way to build a pension than taking the salary, paying huge amounts of tax.

Only for a bit though til Labour start siphoning that too

Gosh, it’s incredibly sad for you to be struggling, without even a nanny.
Perhaps your first steps to freeing up some cash could be doing your own ironing or housework.
…..and you both grew up incredibly poor? This thread CANNOT be for real!

I hate to say this OP, but if you feel poor now, wait until you have 3 DC at Senior private school. £3k a month in fees is very low - I have 2 DC in Senior and the fees are over £4k a month - that’s with a 20% and 25% sports scholarship. You definitely best get back to work!