HH income of £250k but we don’t feel rich?

[Bdrgvlugcbu]

Not a brag in the slightest! And wouldn’t discuss this non-anonymously.

DH earns just over £250k per year. Has fallen into the role really and is based on natural ability/talent as oppose to lots of hard work and training. He works very long hours though. I’m a SAHM to 3 young children.

Take home is approx £12k per month.

School fees: £3,000 per month
Mortgage, car and bills: £3500 per month
Personal savings £2000 per month
Kids savings: £450 per month
DH and I take: £500 personal money each per month
Leaves us with £2,000 per month for general spending, food shopping, days out, holidays, children’s clothes…

We don’t really go without, but we don’t feel “well off” by any means. Where are we going wrong?!

Jesus, typical arsehole answers from Mumsnetters.

If you go to your local children’s centre you might be able to get a Food Bank referral?

I’m so sorry you’re not coping on your DH’s wage. It’s ridiculous how employers expect that wage to even cover one person, let alone five people.

Thoughts and prayers 🙏🏻.

You’re saving £2450 a month. So you do have money left over.

I expect you’re frittering money away all over the place because you’re not putting any effort in to making it work harder for you. Have you invested in solar panels for the house? Replaced your cars and appliances with more efficient models? Got rid of unnecessary expenditure?

Most people live just within their means - and your expectations of life increase as your income does. So you expect ski holidays and 5* AI for a fortnight in August and private school and a big house and a nice car each; you have a cleaner and a gardener and someone who comes to wash the windows on your huge house… it’s expensive.

Some families whole income would be the near 2.5k you save each month. Of course you are well off

Send your kids to a state school and you can save 5k a month. Big difference. But no-one is going to feel sorry for you here. I raised 3 kids as a single parent and despite no 3k a month education they came out with top grades and top degrees. And are humble.

I do.

You do…you have £2k that you put into savings…what else do you do with leftovers??
A lot of people live in that for a whole month.

That’s the cocaine budget

You don't feel well off because you seem to think it's normal to spend £3k on school fees, £2.5k on savings and £3.5 k on mortgage and bills per month. These are massive spends. Be grateful for what you have as many households live on less than a quarter of your budget. You are hugely wealthy. You have 2.5k 'spare' to save per month. You have £3k 'spare' to spend on school fees. These are choices and where your cash is going.

Saving more than a lot of people earn should make you feel well off....

here we go again.
I don't envy you, your lifestyle sounds very very miserable. You need a NMW job as soon as possible, love, because I am sure he already has a younger model lined up

Terrible bait!

You can’t afford the school fees if you are spending a quarter of your take home income on them.

And I missed the part where you and husband take 500 quid each personal money per month. If you aren’t winding us up you are delulu.

Have you thought about doing Only Fans?

But after everything has gone out and you’ve paid school fees, 2k savings, £500 each spending, you have 2,000 pounds left to play with. That IS A LOT.

If you don’t think it is, reduce the savings to 1k a month and stop paying in the kids savings account. That leaves you with £3,500 a month surplus income. How much more do you want?

🤦🏻‍♀️.

And put your income into this and give your head a wobble https://www.ons.gov.uk/visualisations/dvc1802/calculator/index.html

You do have lots of money left over you put it in savings! This post is fucking ridiculous 🙄

Well most people do not spend £3000 on school fees each month, have children's savings, have a smaller mortgage and certainly not £500 each to spend on themselves. Absolutely fine if your income allows this, but your income allows this because you are well off. You are also very fortunate not to have to work. I am also very fortunate that my social worker salary (whilst not huge) allowed me and my children to survive and have a life when DH died very suddenly and insurances refused to pay out. It is all relative.

Take home is approx £12k per month.
School fees: £3,000 per month not essential
Mortgage, car and bills: £3500 per month
Personal savings £2000 per month not essential
Kids savings: £450 per month not essential
DH and I take: £500 personal money each per month not essential
Leaves us with £2,000 per month for general spending, food shopping, days out, holidays, children’s clothes… could be halved

You just know this is going to land on deaf ears…

I would say though that I suspect there’s a huge chunk of people who are having their ever increasing private school fees paid by grandparents - definitely not out of own taxable income. I see this amongst DS and DD’s contemporaries at their prep school. It’s a huge slug of generational wealth being handed down.

Like us, you’re paying fees out of your taxable income, so it’s a hefty whack. Our choice, though, and we are privileged
to have the opportunity for a really good education.
Secondary state schools are all pretty poor in our area so we will be continuing to pay at senior school. It’s a shame we are out of catchment for a grammar school - but it is what it is.

Do you worry about paying the bills each month? I guess not as you are making regular payments into savings.
And if the big end on the car went you’d be ok?
If the first answer is no and the second answer is yes I reckon you would be seen as well off in most people’s eyes.
DH and I are retired, DC flown the nest, house is paid off and we have decent pensions and savings so we are in the fortunate position of not having to worry about money at all. I count that as well off.

Get a chicken, make it last a week

First response nailed it