I’m cheating what to do

[ashamedclown]

Hi all. For the last couple of years I have realised fallen out of love with my DH. We’ve been married for twenty five years and got married in our late teens and we both came from religious households (I am no longer religious myself). We have three children together (19, 17, and 16). I don’t hate him but I just no longer can stand being around him. I am ashamed but for the last nine months I have been having an affair. He’s not in a relationship and he is generous and kind. He says now that I have to tell my husband about us so that we can officially get together but this would mean admitting to what I’ve done. I don’t know my children or parents would react to me having done something so horrible. What should I do?

Stop cheating and leave your husband and spend some time on your own.

End it with other guy until you can be honest and face into what you have done to husband/family.

We actually met at the gym. My husband never goes to the gym so that’s where we kept meeting up.

Fucking stop cheating.

Just tell them the truth, yes they will possibly be hurt or angry, but… that’s your fault so just face up to it and try and at least sound sorry.

😂😂😂😂

OP you're going to get ripped to shreds with this...

You're cheating on your husband, yes you need to tell him ASAP and not only because your side piece says so.

If you are unhappy then you're supposed to leave, not start cheating.

You'll have to come clean and deal with all the fall out.

Leave your husband. Own up to the terrible decisions you've made. Hope your children can move on eventually from what you've done to your family.
You've done an awful thing and deserve for it to be public.

I can’t exactly remember to be honest. We got chatting and I think we were both a bit flirty.

So what do you want?

To be with the new guy? 9 months doesn't seem to be a long time together before making this decision.

No matter what happens now it's going to be messy and hard

Tell your husband. He has a right to know and you don't have a right to have your cake and eat it. Be with one man or the other, not both.

Let the chips fall as they may. Maybe your husband will be ok with it as long as he can go out and shag some other women as well. Which of course you'd be fine with. Or maybe he'll leave you, which will allow you to be with the other man guilt free. Your kids are old enough that a divorce wouldn't be that complicated, and you'd probably both be happier.

Stop both relationships, be on your own for a while. You need to separate from your DH as soon as possible and let him know that the relationship is over. It’s not fair on him to string him along in the hopes of keeping the status quo.

So this single bloke has found a woman in an unhappy relationship, done some love bombing, and is getting a regular shag?

He might not be the prince you think he is

Tell your hubby. He doesn't need you in his life.

Let me quess one thing lead to another and your clothes just vanished?

Intuition

Who cares, she’s having an affair and is thinking of leaving the man she can’t stand to be with affair partner, the details of sexual activity aren’t that relevant

OP since they've now posted about it twice this person apparently wants to know if you're shagging the guy you've been seeing for 9 months? No idea why it makes a difference but have at it, have you been shagging @ashamedclown?

Life is messy.

Against the grain a bit. You're dont have to fess up, no one deserves to know "the truth"

BUT you do owe it to OH to stop fucking cheating on them.

Stop cheating, make the decision whether you stay with OH (doesn't sound like it) or end the relationship. And then when the relationship is over, you are single and can pursue other options. Affair partner being one of them.

Your OH doesnt "have to know" that youve been cheating BUT they do deserve to know that youve fallen out of love, the relationship doesnt make you happy and you want to part ways. They dont need to know youve been screwing around behind their back or anything that will cause them additional hurt and pain!.

The morality police are out in force, OP.
Do what seems right. You only get one life.