Man knocking telling me to come outside

[AmberHiker]

At around 11pm, when all the houses were dark and quiet, an unknown man repeatedly knocked on my door. He didn’t knock loudly like it was an emergency – it was light but constant, which somehow felt worse.

I was home alone with my young child, which already made me feel vulnerable. I didn’t open the door but spoke through the glass. He told me there was an issue with “cars outside” and kept saying I should come out and look. His story was vague and didn’t really make sense. He had a dog right up at my door and he stood a few steps back. I started recording the conversation on my phone.

As it went on, he became more agitated. He then said he was going home but still told me I should come out and check for myself. I didn’t.

After he left, I looked outside properly from my kitchen window . The only car there was mine. There was absolutely nothing wrong with it – no lights on, no windows open, no damage, nothing. There were no other cars like he’d suggested either. There was literally no reason for him to knock on my door late at night.

The fact that he knocked repeatedly, tried to get me to come outside, and used a story that wasn’t true has really shaken me. Being alone at night with my child, in the dark, with someone trying to lure me outside has made me feel unsafe in my own home. I keep thinking how different it could have been if I’d opened the door.

I’ve reported it, but I just wanted to share in case it helps someone else trust their instincts. If something feels off, it probably is.

A neighbour down our road was burgled a few years ago and it was a very specific time when they were only out for an hour or so. Someone had obviously been watching the house - and were potentially after something in particular.

I had a man knocking late last year. I didn't engage at all the first time as I was frozen with fear. He came back a couple of weeks later so I put my Bluetooth speaker right by the door on full volume and played a man's voice shouting "what do you want?" on repeat. He never returned

I answer the door during the day because we very rarely get cold callers and most people who ring the bell are either delivering or are people we know well. At night I would stick my head out of the bathroom window, which is above the front door, and ask who it is and what do they want.

Something like this happened to me a few years ago when I was a student. About 2am (mid week) an older man started banging on the door of my flat shouting that I turn the music down. I had been asleep in the flat alone for about 2 hours and even before that I had read in bed for an hour and I don't think I had played music at all that night. I told him there was no music and that we were all asleep but he continued to bang on the door insisting that I open the door to him. I was alone because my two male flatmates spend most nights at their girlfriends flats or were out partying somewhere so I was normally on my own at night in that flat. After some time of me refusing to open the door he eventually went away. It happened again a week or so later and this time I told him I was calling the police and he legged it. He had been claiming to live upstairs from me but he went down the stairs to the exit of the flats. The police came out but he wasn't ever found.

I think he had somehow noticed that I was a young woman alone in the flat most nights and I think probably planned to assault me in some way if I'd been stupid enough to open the door to him. The main security door to the flat had been damaged a few weeks before all this happened was finally fixed after the police were involved. I unfortunately never got a good look at the man's face as it was always in shadow as the stairway light was behind him.

I would tell the police as I he might be trying it on elsewhere, I really hate to think what his motives might be.

You did the right thing.. especially reporting it. Sometimes it builds a picture of some random creep trying different houses.

Get a ring though. Or the equivalent with a free cloud. They give piece of mind

I had a kid try this - about 11 maybe but in daylight - we had two door clear glass outter one and main door - outside one was locked and I declined to open due to young kids but he seem upset so offered several times to phone police he went when I got the phone to do so.

Later found out it was a gang doing burglary in local area - man went in back though we had two back doors both locked during the day. Here the doors,may well be unlocked but there I locked them as seem to get quite a few issues peopel tryimg doors or knocking selling.

I didn't report this events but others did and police and local paper alerted people.

To be honest I don’t think life is bleak for women living alone/with children as is being made out here. I think this thread is giving lots of worst case scenarios but generally loads of women live without adult men and fare fine!

I think you just have to tell yourself that no one knocking on your door late at night, needs you to open the door. Just ignore it completely especially if you have cameras. Sure there might be a 0.01% chance that someone knocking on your door is escaping danger or whatever nonsense scenario posed by others, but that is going to be such a rare scenario that ignoring late night knocks on the door is still going to be in your best interest regardless.

For anyone needing help, calling the emergency services is always going to be the first point of call. In most situations a random woman with/without a child is not going to be the most helpful anyway so they’d be better off going elsewhere.

I just think - keep the cameras, ensure they are charged and working and don’t let both batteries die simultaneously again. Don’t speak to anyone at the door at night, they don’t need to hear a female voice speaking to them
it cements that you’re an easy target if they are that way included. If you don’t engage, they lose interest. Especially if they’re being recorded on camera.

I have CCTV and I’d say no one bothers me since putting the cameras up. Before that I might have random knocks but I didn’t know who that was per se. But since having the cameras, they are a massive deterrent to random BS.

Hope you’re ok Op.

I love living alone but I take precautions. I have an alarm which I put on at night. It is one of those where if it goes off they ring and ask if you are ok and I can call them if I someone was to break in during the night. The alarm would probably have gone off if someone knocked on my door at night.

I haven’t got a ringdoor bell. I need to get one.

I want to buy a door jammer I saw for sale on Amazon. Apparently it stops people getting in but you can swiftly disarm it if you need to get out yourself. Does anyone have one?

I think anyone that is knocking on your door to try and entice you to open the door has more than MH issues. They are evil wrong un's.

I haven’t heard of that but I don’t think you need that tbh. The cameras will be more value for money.

You don’t only want to protect yourself in case a conflict occurs, you want to prevent the conflict from happening to begin with - cameras are a big deterrent. It might be the case that some invader unable to enter your house due to the door jammer, would not have targeted you to begin with if they saw visible CCTV in the first place. Because then it moves from opportunistic crime to something they have to plan out and consider evidence in advance. Cameras don’t prevent every crime but I’d rather invest in that than a door jammer.

People can have genuine and helpful reasons, definitely. Recently I had to get the gas board out and the engineer had to rouse all the neighbours in the early hours, in essence to save their lives. Took her ages as people weren't answering.

However we always need to be cautious/sensible as predators will try anything.

I don't necessarily agree that it gives piece of mind. A handful of friends and one of my neighbours have become over anxious and mildly paranoid with the false positives it throws up. I've had to check out my neighbour's property a good number of times because of their bloody ring door bell (don't mind though as she does so much for me)

I actually opened a door to Gas meter bloke, well what i thought it was.
It was dark winter rainy day, few years ago, around 6.30pm, also had black clothes on and also hoodie on.
He knocked on, I opened -thinking its a courier I was expecting.
He said he came to take down a gas meter readings and he waved some lanyard with some vague id.
I let him, gas meter located in the kitchen, had to walk through the living room.
As soon he walked into living room, he spotted DH sitting on the sofa, he looked well taken aback but continued following me to the kitchen, where pointed to the meters door.
He looked briefly at it and said ok and quickly walked out.
He didn't even typed the numbers down or looked long enough!
A hour later a neighbour in our road posted that a same looking man tried to get into her house, her teen daughter opened the door and said to him to come another day when mum will be home, he put his foot into the door trying to push the door open, luckily her boyfriend was upstairs so she quickly called him and the bloke just run out quickly.
I actually couldn't believe it when I read it, I also contacted my Gas company to confirm if anyone checking meters in our street today, they confirmed 100% nope.

So you would report someone asking for help and you saying no and walking away without incident?
I'd be surprised if they did anything about that.
You did the right thing by not doing it but you said no and continued he didn't follow or attempt to do anything to you so I can't see how that's report worthy or that they'd do anything.
Perhaps nothing would have happened even if you had helped.
Again you did the right thing, I'd have refused too but I wouldn't have seen me refusing and walking away without further incident report worthy.

As for the OP someone knocking on the door of her house at night would definitely be report worthy.

Thanks for all your responses and sharing your experiences . I have learned to never have the ring doorbells not charged for the night time . They are both back on.

i checked my car this morning . Absolutely nothing different - wrong - at all. I drove to town and back. I was on edge last night I stayed up for a long time and today this evening I felt paranoid about not having the curtains closed come evening time . I’ve changed the settings on my doorbell so they notify me critical even if my phone is on do not disturb.

I don’t think I will hear anything from the police . The only other odd thing was a Deliveroo driver came to the door and I checked over the camera it was for this address ? He said it was but then that he was looking for someone called Daniel on the order … that’s never happened before either ! Not connected I’m sure but I don’t want any more unknown males knocking at my door !

Police should investigate and find him. This is how people like Wayne cousins slip through the net until they commit a terrible crime - which could be preventable if police took things like this as seriously as they should

@CellophanicDreams - that’s fair. I would have explained the whole thing to the police but not with the expectation that they would take action or arrest him for that but in case it helped build up a profile if others were reporting similar.

Re the delivery driver, do you have any streets nearby with the same first part of the name as yours? E.g. XXX Road, XXX Close, XXX Terrace? This was the issue with the delivery driver that knocked on our door the other night. The delivery was intended for a nearby street with the same first part of the name.

You could always play Dave Edmunds’ no 1 song from 1970 on full blast from an upstairs window. That’ll definitely drive the message home

Personally I would always say something like, "OK I'll get my husband to look shortly". Doesn't have to be husband, can be brother, partner, anything but someone male. So they don't think you're alone.

How horrible for you, hope you’re ok! Something similar happened to me a few years ago, I was on my own with my daughter who was about 6 at the time, and somebody woke me up banging on my door at 2:30 in the morning, I was absolutely rooted to the spot - petrified!
I did report it to the police and a lovely PCSO came round. She was so helpful and gave me loads of reassurance and advice and told me to get security cameras front and back. She also said to buy a curtain for the front door (it made me really anxious that somebody would be able to see through the glass panels if I moved around). I also put a security motion activated light out the back.
it did happen a couple more times and somebody once knocked before midnight, i never did find out who or why. Maybe some drunk getting mixed up with their mates house or something! Honestly it was still horrible but I felt a little bit safer as I had used that advice, the door curtain was the best I still have it now.. I hope it doesn’t happen to you again x

Hi Op you did the right thing but don’t rule out they are not connected just treat them all the same unwanted. I would say even if there was an issue with your car leave it be as it’s not more important than you or your dc. Cars are replaceable. They could be opportunists working together next time it could be an old lady or a kid just use the bell for any conversation.

I live with my partner and we do not answer the door after dark. We've had people knock at 10.30pm and 5am in the morning and we won't answer if it is dark outside.
You have definitely done the right thing OP. I hope it doesn't happen again.

Glad you reported this and did not open the door.
What person knocks this late and constantly makes me angry just thinking about it.
I'd definitely up your security with a ring doorbell the police will tell you to do this.