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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Man knocking telling me to come outside

157 replies

AmberHiker · 11/01/2026 01:07

At around 11pm, when all the houses were dark and quiet, an unknown man repeatedly knocked on my door. He didn’t knock loudly like it was an emergency – it was light but constant, which somehow felt worse.

I was home alone with my young child, which already made me feel vulnerable. I didn’t open the door but spoke through the glass. He told me there was an issue with “cars outside” and kept saying I should come out and look. His story was vague and didn’t really make sense. He had a dog right up at my door and he stood a few steps back. I started recording the conversation on my phone.

As it went on, he became more agitated. He then said he was going home but still told me I should come out and check for myself. I didn’t.

After he left, I looked outside properly from my kitchen window . The only car there was mine. There was absolutely nothing wrong with it – no lights on, no windows open, no damage, nothing. There were no other cars like he’d suggested either. There was literally no reason for him to knock on my door late at night.

The fact that he knocked repeatedly, tried to get me to come outside, and used a story that wasn’t true has really shaken me. Being alone at night with my child, in the dark, with someone trying to lure me outside has made me feel unsafe in my own home. I keep thinking how different it could have been if I’d opened the door.

I’ve reported it, but I just wanted to share in case it helps someone else trust their instincts. If something feels off, it probably is.

OP posts:
BarbarianBabs · 11/01/2026 08:54

AmberHiker · 11/01/2026 01:27

I actually have two ring doorbells one in the front and one covering the back alley and just my luck both were on charge at this time . I’m still awake now, I feel so unsettled which is silly but had I opened the door I’m assuming the dog would have come in first. I’ve listened to the recording over and over he doesn’t say for example ‘ sorry to knocks late is that your car outside ? The window is down ‘ you know something plausible it’s all very vague . First he says you should come out and look when he sees I’m not going too he says ‘ I’m going home now but you should still come look for yourself ‘ he was like 6ft with a non local accent and had a scarf wrapped around the bottom of his face .. which he did remove . Why did he knock so gently ? First couple I ignored I assumed maybe a delivery driver wrong house , but after a gap he knocked again.. feel quite shook up

I highly recommend getting a spare battery so you can always replace with a charged one with the dead battery is charging up.

so sorry this happened. Must have been very unsettling.

Laura95167 · 11/01/2026 09:09

Tbh if this happens again, I wouldnt speak to him i would ignore the knocking and call the police immediately.

RampantIvy · 11/01/2026 09:19

That sounds worrying. Have you checked your car this morning?

Dery · 11/01/2026 09:22

“butterpuffed · Today 08:02
I was married to a policeman and he sometimes worked nights [from 10pm]. He used to say if someone knocks , don't actually open the door , talk through it [like the OP] but as you go up to it call out 'It's okay, I'll go' so they don't think you're alone in the house.”

This is great advice. Give the impression you’re not alone and also ideally that there’s a man in the house.

Not quite the same thing but for when you’re in the street: i have raised my now young adult DDs to be wary of adults (particularly men) who approach young women to ask for help. If they need help, they can get it from another adult male. I had a taste of this many years ago when walking home late at night. I was vaguely aware of a man walking towards me on the other side of the road. He had been walking normally. Then he saw me and suddenly leaned down on a crutch he had been carrying and asked if i would help him up the steps to his front door (some of the houses on that road have front steps). I refused and kept walking. I wasn’t particularly scared because traffic-wise this is a reasonably busy road, but i still get a chill thinking about what might have happened if i’d helped him. Nowadays, i would report this just so the police have a note of it but it happened about 20 years ago.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 11/01/2026 09:30

How scary. I hope you’re OK now, OP.

A ring doorbell would be good.
Our burglar alarm includes a panic button right by the front door* which will summon the police. I’ve never had to use it - the only time it’s been used was by a child on a play date who had poked it - the police came round PDQ - I was very apologetic, but they said it happened a lot.

*there’s another right by the bed.

Mixerfixer · 11/01/2026 09:34

Any camera would be fine, doesn't need to be a "ring doorbell " You can get some quite cheap ones that you can plug in, so no need to charge. And you can see the fotage on your phone.

Thehandinthecookiejar · 11/01/2026 09:38

Why would you go and “have a look” at a broken down car? Are you a mechanic? Very weird. Good for you for not opening the door though

TortoiseWhoLovesStrawberries · 11/01/2026 09:39

Maybe he was trying to steal your car, get you outside with the keys.

It would be interesting to know if any of your neighbours also had a visit from him.

Alittlefrustrated · 11/01/2026 09:39

It sounds like it's probably genuine/innocent to me,as a past late nighr dog walker. I've knocked to say someone's car was open.
You were right not to go out of course.

BoudiccaRuled · 11/01/2026 09:44

Probably someone on way home from the pub who saw the moonlight reflecting off the car. My uncle did similar recently, dragging us all out to see "the luminescence". Pissed as a fart.

GeorgeMichaelsCat · 11/01/2026 09:55

both were on charge at this time

Buy a second battery for each. Charge them up and then as soon as the battery runs down on your devices, swap it out with the charged ones.

HappyMamma2023 · 11/01/2026 09:58

Hope you're OK this morning OP xx

80smonster · 11/01/2026 10:01

I’d have said: ‘The can police sort the issue with cars. They are on their way now, will you wait to explain it to them?’. Then monitored
his reaction. So odd.

MovedlikeHarlowinMonteCarlo · 11/01/2026 10:03

Alittlefrustrated · 11/01/2026 09:39

It sounds like it's probably genuine/innocent to me,as a past late nighr dog walker. I've knocked to say someone's car was open.
You were right not to go out of course.

Why was he so vague then? He could have simply told her the problem then left.

PullTheBricksDown · 11/01/2026 10:05

TortoiseWhoLovesStrawberries · 11/01/2026 09:39

Maybe he was trying to steal your car, get you outside with the keys.

It would be interesting to know if any of your neighbours also had a visit from him.

I think this too. Lots of burglaries are about stealing car keys. Also, given that what he said didn't make a lot of sense, he could have been under the influence of something. Hope the car's OK this morning

darkmatterspacemystery · 11/01/2026 10:07

Alittlefrustrated · 11/01/2026 09:39

It sounds like it's probably genuine/innocent to me,as a past late nighr dog walker. I've knocked to say someone's car was open.
You were right not to go out of course.

I disagree - if her car door was open then he should have just said that- "just to let you know your car door is open". That's it and then left. He didnt need to insist she came out of her house.

The fact he insisted on being vague, not telling her what was wrong and then got agitated when she didnt come out is concerning.

Daygloboo · 11/01/2026 10:09

AmberHiker · 11/01/2026 01:07

At around 11pm, when all the houses were dark and quiet, an unknown man repeatedly knocked on my door. He didn’t knock loudly like it was an emergency – it was light but constant, which somehow felt worse.

I was home alone with my young child, which already made me feel vulnerable. I didn’t open the door but spoke through the glass. He told me there was an issue with “cars outside” and kept saying I should come out and look. His story was vague and didn’t really make sense. He had a dog right up at my door and he stood a few steps back. I started recording the conversation on my phone.

As it went on, he became more agitated. He then said he was going home but still told me I should come out and check for myself. I didn’t.

After he left, I looked outside properly from my kitchen window . The only car there was mine. There was absolutely nothing wrong with it – no lights on, no windows open, no damage, nothing. There were no other cars like he’d suggested either. There was literally no reason for him to knock on my door late at night.

The fact that he knocked repeatedly, tried to get me to come outside, and used a story that wasn’t true has really shaken me. Being alone at night with my child, in the dark, with someone trying to lure me outside has made me feel unsafe in my own home. I keep thinking how different it could have been if I’d opened the door.

I’ve reported it, but I just wanted to share in case it helps someone else trust their instincts. If something feels off, it probably is.

I'd especially secure your back door tonight as well. You'd think if there was an issue with cars he would have been more specific about what the issue was. Without wishing to sound dramatic, can you have some sort of room inside with a lock on or something that you can go to with your child so you have time to ring the police if he did break in. Or make an arrangement with a neighbour to ring or something. Some plan to make you safe and buy you time incase he comes back. It does sound odd. And definitely alert the neighbours.

ElizabethsTailor · 11/01/2026 10:15

I think you were sensible to not open the door. And there have been some good suggestions here (don’t charge the doorbells at night, shout out to “your husband” on your way to the door, etc).

However I also think it’s important to remember it might have been completely innocent.

It’s unfortunately too easy to build these things up in one’s mind, particularly when some replies here have been going to extremes.

Alltheyellowbirds · 11/01/2026 10:19

Just checking in to make sure all is well this morning?

Daftapath · 11/01/2026 10:26

GeorgeMichaelsCat · 11/01/2026 09:55

both were on charge at this time

Buy a second battery for each. Charge them up and then as soon as the battery runs down on your devices, swap it out with the charged ones.

Op doesn’t need two spare batteries, just one. They can be rotated with one always fully charged ready to swap out

Charlize43 · 11/01/2026 10:37

I would ask your neighbours if he knocked on their doors to ask if the car outside with the window open was theirs? At least that would put your mind at rest about his motives. Maybe he was genuine, maybe not.

However, you did absolutely the right thing not to open your door.

Dollymylove · 11/01/2026 10:39

You did the right thing phoning the police. No way would I open the door late at night to anyone. No wonder you felt unnerved. Hopefully it wont happen again

usedtobeaylis · 11/01/2026 10:49

Have you been out to look at your car this morning just in case there was something and it was genuine?

FlapperFlamingo · 11/01/2026 10:52

Honestly I’d have called the police there and then. Perhaps he had done it to several people in the samecroad. As PP have said please make sure your ring doorbell is charged.

Thatpastalife · 11/01/2026 10:54

This sounds incredibly sinister, thank goodness you did not open the door. Always trust your gut in these situations, if something feels off, it is, end of.
Good shout letting the police know, I would also flag on any community groups, whatsapps etc you may be on.