Nursery teachers snarky comment

[CheekyTealFawn]

I’m livid, wondering whether to bring it up or just leave it if I’m overreacting.

DD is 2 yrs 9 month old, and just started nursery today. She’ll go 2 days per week, 7.30am-6.30pm.

I work two jobs (one evening and one Saturday per week), as I am studying 30 hours per week for my BA in English, which I do on my childcare days, in nap times, and every free evening I have. So, I could really use every minute of help I can get.

I dropped DD off at 8.30am no problems. When I go to pick her up, I get there at 6.20pm. I see I have two missed calls from the nursery. I ask why they called, worried, and the manager laughed and said “because we want to go home.” I was confused, and said “oh, I’m so sorry, I thought pick up was before 6.30?” And she pulled a face and said “yes, but it’s Friday and your daughter is the last one here, and she has been waiting and asking for you and wondering why she is the only one”

All of the staff had their hats and coats on waiting by the door when I arrived. DD was also sat by the door with her hat and coat on looking out the window waiting for me. it’s made me feel like the worst mum, and extremely embarrassed as I felt like the staff were all looking at and judging me. My daughter loved her first day, seems very happy there, but I don’t know whether to say something to the manager about it?

I understand it’s Friday and of course the staff want to go home, but I didn’t initially want Fridays, but they made me pick that day since it was quieter and we’re only part time, to make room for more full time children on the other days .

i don’t know what I’d say, and I don’t know if mum guilt at leaving my daughter there last is making me more sensitive, but now I’m anxious to leave her there until 6.20, even though I could really use it since I’m constantly playing catch up with my university work because I’m forever lagging behind due to not being able to afford enough childcare.

am I being sensitive? Should I say something? If so, what?

I would email.

Thank you for a good first week, Olivia talked positively about xyz.

I am concerned that Fridays do not work for you, based on (quote comments).

As you know, Friday is not my preference for how I distribute the hours of childcare I need. This was the only option you offered me.

I wanted to offer again that I could do (half days, any other day, etc).

If Friday is the best day for you, then please be assured that I will ensure I am on time, but will be collecting at 6.20, allowing for a 5min handover and picking up her things and so on.

Please do ensure that Olivia is playing and engaging with staff and not sat waiting.

Kind regards (tossers),

You

Pretty simple. Them calling could be the reason the op is stalled for a further 5 minutes. It is stupid.

Maybe you could offer some advice to the op? Or maybe you support the coated staff making their exit? Having a dig at me is a little sad.

Edit to ask why you removed your “grow up” comment? It was fine. I wasn’t offended. More Bemused.

Some people have no choice!

With their attitude, I’d be seriously concerned about leaving my child with them full stop.

I think you just - unnecessarily - provided it Pliro.

Fair enough.

Because they called at 6.19pm and 6.20pm, and I arrived at the nursery a handful of seconds after the second cal, which is when I noticed they had phoned. As I was walking through the wind and rain to pick her up at the time, I didn’t hear or feel my phone ringing, otherwise I would have

I would be reporting them to Ofsted

Mine went to a nursery and I had to be there 10 minutes before closing time for the handover. The staff finished at closing time. I think this is what they’re saying to you. If you arrive at 6.30 to pick her up, you won’t leave until 6.40. Just clarify that in a phone call with the manager.

I work in a nursery. It annoys me when my colleagues complain children won’t be picked up until 5.45 when we’re open till 6. Later pick ups are parents who work and they’re entitled to have their child with us until closing time. Really drives me mad when they complain about it

Thank you so much for this, this is so kind and was something I definitely needed to hear 🥰 I also am old enough to remember when my mum went back to university and I just remember my pride when she graduated, the only part of her studying and being away long hours I remember is seeing her study notes stuck all over the kitchen so she could revise while cooking. Now I’m a mum myself I look back on that with even more pride because I think my mum was and is incredible

When I asked, because I was genuinely so confused at their reaction to me arriving at 6.20, if the pick up time was before 6.30, they basically said yes it is but it’s Friday and we want to go home as your kid is the only one here!

That’s actually uncalled for.

They were very unprofessional. This is not a 'you' problem. I would speak to the manager if it happens again, asking to change your days.

What’s uncalled for is questioning why both me and another mum in the thread had kids if we’re going to “outsource them to other people for most of their waking hours”. That sounds like the behaviour of an unhappy person to me 🤔

Clearly the child isn’t ’outsourced for the majority of her waking hours.’

With that said I do kind of agree that until 630 is a long day, even for two days a week. I just think it’s a lot for the staff and the children, but the way this was explained was unprofessional.

I can see that a setting closing at 630 and having parents pick up at 620 would grate a bit and I wouldn’t do it.

Co

Op, just ignore these stupid, ignorant comments.

Completely agree it’s long, it is. I wish I could spread it out but everytime I asked in my nursery search it was an emphatic no. Childcare is really hard work, I did it for a few years and I’ve never been so exhausted, but I worked 7am-7pm, I was tired but those were the hours I agreed too. But I don’t feel bad for the staff for the hours, because they know the hours when they take up a job there, and they’re not doing me a favour.

You’re right I should! I resolved to but then everytime I get one I’m like… what are you even talking about and feel compelled 😂🥲

Well that’s unacceptable. You should tell the manager that you’re not happy with this at all and want to know how long she was dressed waiting in her coat to go home. Also they need to change their closing hours accordingly as they cant say 6.30 but expect you there by 6?! Talk to her and explain. Perhaps report it to the owners.

Absolutely cheeky fuckers! Not only that, unprofessional and cruel to do that to your daughter (and you, but especially a child)!

My DD was sometimes one of the last ones there when she was at nursery and I'm sure the staff there wanted to go home too, but they never behaved like that! My DD did used to get a bit upset when the bolk of the other kids had left, but her keyworker would distract her/cheer her up.

You're paying for a service until 6:30, you're within your rights to use it until then.

Definitely agree with comments asking to clarify the opening hours and explain that is why you chose their nursery for the late opening. Are there any other nurseries that open that late should you need to change? (Around here 6 is the latest so not sure whether this is why you went for that nursery as it was the only option).

However I would also try and find out what time other children get picked up on Fridays. Usually on Friday parents do try to pick up early if they can, so it may be that your DD is always last, and if others pick up at 5.30 for example then it will feel like a long time on her own, and there will be staff presumably starting tidying up around her which she might notice more with no other children around her.

The Handmaids have had their say, back to the kitchen for them.

It is a long day and very few children of that age are in care until so late

My daughter went to nursery from 8am to 6pm 5 days a week from just over 5 months old until she started school. So did plenty of other children at that time.

many children picked up at that time are over tired

I don't understand that, why would they be more tired at nursery than at home? The nursery should be managing activities and quiet times so that children don't get over tired.

@CheekyTealFawn Waiting by the door with hats and coats on as if you were late is outrageous and unprofessional. They should have been engaging your daughter so that she felt special (not abandoned!).